Listen, lemme tell you a story:

A good friend of mine called me a few weeks back.  He's an LSU fan, but a good guy, through and through.  "Just so you know, I have an extra ticket."  I demurred.

Then:  Texas fell . . . and something inside me clicked.

So I find myself heading South and shaking my head. "I generally hate getting hit in the face, and I further hate getting hit in the face with Jack Dan'l's bottles."

I've never been in Death Valley before, and here are the things you need to know:

First:  good dang stadium.  Fast elevators, jambalaya at the concessions, drinking beer allowed on campus.  Second:  maniacs in your face screaming, Dark Lord avatars hung and burned outside the stadium.  My favorite slur of all time:  "Gump."  The Cajun accent obscured the meaning.  I didn't get it until, like, the third time.  Laughing just made the guy madder, but frankly, Gump is a hilarious put-down.

A good, all-LSU section filled with smart folks and a large anti-Jerrett Lee faction.  When the field goal was blocked, three seconds to go, what did I do? Damn near threw up.  The good folks around me hooted and hollered, but then quite kindly patted me on the shoulders.  I looked up:  "it's SEC," I said, and there were more hollers.  Those who left early were damned.

Right before the attempt, I told my buddy--whose ticket I was riding on--"I ain't singing Rammer Jammer.  No need when it's a clinical win via field goal."

Then, after the block (and what a helluva block):  fear:  then:  RASHAD!!:  then:  "I take back what I said."

And so when John Parker punched it in, what was left of my voice screeched out the holy lyric.  In the distance--lo!  An end zone away!--I saw my people singing, and I rejoiced.

HEY TIGERS!!

When was the last time we could sing that?

HEY TIGERS!!

When was the last time a Bama fan screamed that, hoarse through four quarters of SEC hell?

WE JUST . . .

I got to sing "Rammer Jammer" in Death Valley.  God bless the boys that made it possible.