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Why i hate jorts, airbrush, and everything florida

my second game seeing bama v. florida was the 93 sec championship game at legion field.  david palmer was taking snaps at  quarterback because of injuries.  our defense was stifling, but not at its best  b/c our offense couldn't hold onto the ball.  the weather was miserable.  it was cold and rainy.  my dad had 8 tickets.  we only used two, but didnt sell the rest, since they were free to us and looked pretty cool. it was better than selling for five bucks a pop outside of legions field.  we took the seats under the upper deck because of the sorry weather.  the game was just plain sloppy.  this was the first time i saw florida fans as "those obnoxious sons of beotches".  i remember seeing cigarette smoking, torn jeans wearing auburn fans taunt my father while watching the iron bowl, but this was something different.  florida went on to win (insert score here).  since the  sugar bowl was at stake, all of the florida fans found it appropriate to toss sugar from the upper deck.  if you've never experienced this, sugar and rain make for a bit of a mess.  this was also the first time i thought i was going to see my father whoop somebody's arse.  the combination of the rain, sugar, and arrogant gator fans damn near sent my normally pedestrian father into a "mood".  walknig back to the car, i couldn't help but thinking, "holy crap!  i'm gonna have to restrain my father from kicking the ever living crap out of some idiot in orange."  on the way home, we had to stop at arby's to wash off and calm down.  we weren't too surprised about the outcome of the game, but i was totally shocked at the conduct of the florida fans. 

luckily in 1999, i was able to see bama whip florida's butt in the georgia dome, with my father.  as satisfying as it was, i feel that there is some payback due.  i will not be attending this seccg, nor will my father.  however, i still remember having domino's sugar poured on me in the rain 15 years ago and i'm still pissed.  for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.  this is yours, florida.  be ready.

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yeah but

we don’t have as many horse farms as yall do, so sugar cubes are in short supply. Just be glad you weren’t at the Vandy bowl-clinching game, as you might have been pelted with weedeaters.

by skigator93 on Dec 5, 2008 8:42 AM CST reply actions  

1996 Game

Better known as “Dear God, can we please stop Wuerffel throwing the damned corner fade, 45-30 and not that close game”…we were at a pub and some jort-attired Gators came over, bought us a pitcher then proceeded to Gator chomp and scream at us the entire meal. The bartender took pity on us and played “Sweet Home Alabama” and the Gators screamed even louder “Spurrier is of the Virgin Mary”

Any time Florida is involved, it’s surreal

by Stuck in the Plains on Dec 5, 2008 9:05 AM CST reply actions  

I lived...

…in Florida during the ’05 beatdown. Wore my Brodie jersey for a week straight.

by Nico2.0 on Dec 5, 2008 9:25 AM CST reply actions  

heck yes

i did too. Brodie Croyle was and is basically my man crush and i let every florida fan in ear shot hear what I had to say.

long live Brodemus Maximus Croylus, Smasher of Gators, Defeater of Meyers.

im not impressed with your performance

by troy145 on Dec 5, 2008 12:57 PM CST up reply actions  

Don't

forget the worst thing about Florida, hair gel. I went to the Bama-FSU game last year in freakville and I swear I saw enough dudes with their hair encased in liquid goup to last me a lifetime…

by Bens4vcobra on Dec 5, 2008 10:32 AM CST reply actions  

I myself

am a Dapper Dan man.

Auburn fans are like slinkys... not really good for anything but they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs.

by IHC800 on Dec 5, 2008 10:59 AM CST up reply actions  

And...

…a man of constant sorrow?

by NiceLittleSaturday on Dec 5, 2008 11:30 AM CST up reply actions  

Do you often find yourself...

in a tight spot?

"There's a lot of blood, sweat, and guts between dreams and success" - Coach Bryant

by TopDaddy on Dec 5, 2008 1:48 PM CST up reply actions  

I'll tell ya'll one thang shure...

Them Gators is gonna R-U-N-N-O-F-T after they git their tales whuped!

I bleed crimson and white...I puke Vol puke orange. RTR

by SugarBowl93 on Dec 5, 2008 2:16 PM CST up reply actions  

Come on...

no need to rip on Jacksonville. A great city by the way. Growing up in Jacksonville, I’ve always hated the Gators as much if not more than anyone else. But I’ve been a Tide fan since I was born in ‘86 (my momma gre up in B’ham). I love Jacksonville………Roll Tide!!!! Bring it home tomorrow!!!

by dsz002 on Dec 5, 2008 7:49 PM CST up reply actions  

I found your culprits, sir...

"There's a lot of blood, sweat, and guts between dreams and success" - Coach Bryant

by TopDaddy on Dec 5, 2008 1:55 PM CST reply actions  

lol @ #14

im not impressed with your performance

by troy145 on Dec 5, 2008 2:16 PM CST up reply actions  

Don't look too far into the picture, Troy.

"There's a lot of blood, sweat, and guts between dreams and success" - Coach Bryant

by TopDaddy on Dec 5, 2008 2:33 PM CST up reply actions  

lol @ overpasses

im not impressed with your performance

by troy145 on Dec 5, 2008 2:58 PM CST up reply actions  

LIVESTRONG, red headed mullet jort gator fan, LIVESTRONG...

and P.S. to the non-LIVESTRONG jort gator fan, the beer goes IN the coozy… but you can just hold it if you’d like… you’ve earned it…

MR. NONLIVESTRONGJORTSWEARINGGAAAAAAATORFAN.
(Anheiser Busch, St. Louis Missouri)

"There's a lot of blood, sweat, and guts between dreams and success" - Coach Bryant

by TopDaddy on Dec 5, 2008 3:42 PM CST up reply actions  

Those guys

crack my s*** up….every time. It’s the gift that keeps giving.

"penis fish"…google that, and the candiru is the first thing that pops up

by Stuck in the Plains on Dec 5, 2008 3:26 PM CST up reply actions  

Who wear's short jorts?

HE WEARS SHORT JORTS!!

(With a big honkin’ belt buckle)

by yellowhammer on Dec 5, 2008 4:16 PM CST up reply actions  

You gotta love that redhead JUST cut off his jeans!

I wonder how many layers of skin peeled off after exposing those legs to the sun??? Ouch!

Unfortunately, the gator fans I KNOW, aren’t this sad, they are arrogant snobs! We all met at a UA/UF game in Ttown in the late ’80s early ’90s, and still keep in touch—-until THIS WEEK! I made the decision not to listen to their BS this year. Maybe I can use this pic, somehow….

by crimsongirl on Dec 5, 2008 3:53 PM CST reply actions  

Be sure to use this one, too

"There's a lot of blood, sweat, and guts between dreams and success" - Coach Bryant

by TopDaddy on Dec 5, 2008 4:15 PM CST up reply actions  

Metal up your ass, big guy.

Keep Rok’n

"penis fish"…google that, and the candiru is the first thing that pops up

by Stuck in the Plains on Dec 5, 2008 6:33 PM CST up reply actions  

Wow

You finally referenced something I know about! I’ve got that tape in a box somewhere.

by yellowhammer on Dec 6, 2008 6:27 AM CST up reply actions  

Ha

I used to be a big fan of him back in the day, I went out and bought a bass guitar just to learn (Anesthesia) Pulling Teeth… and in case you’re wondering, I pulled it off and it was the best day of my life. Except for around 7PM this evening.

by Bens4vcobra on Dec 6, 2008 10:07 AM CST up reply actions  

baseline from hell...

try keeping up with the title track from Master of Puppets. Congrats on Anesthesia though…it’s pretty sweet.

"penis fish"…google that, and the candiru is the first thing that pops up

by Stuck in the Plains on Dec 6, 2008 10:34 AM CST up reply actions  

WOW!

He did stay in the sun too long. That is sickening in so many ways….I can use this, no matter the outcome! Hey, where did his rodeo belt go?

by crimsongirl on Dec 5, 2008 5:14 PM CST reply actions  

It would be funnier

If they weren’t UGA fans in Jacksonville “dressed up” at Florida fans.

The real humor is that the redheaded UGA fan actually had that haircut BEFORE he decided to dress up.

by skigator93 on Dec 5, 2008 7:31 PM CST reply actions  

o me skigator

Alibi Pictures, Images and Photos

im not impressed with your performance

by troy145 on Dec 5, 2008 8:50 PM CST up reply actions  

Me thinks he doth protest too much!

I am SO SORRY skigator! I didn’t realize it was you, or I wouldn’t have kept it up. ;)

by crimsongirl on Dec 5, 2008 7:52 PM CST reply actions  

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