It's Meltdown Time...
by outsidethesidelines on Nov 17, 2009 7:15 AM CST
in Football
77 comments
Another week goes by, and another round of meltdowns explode across the Internet. You would think at some point fan bases would just become immune, but it just doesn't seem to happen that way. When there's a loss, there's a meltdown. You can bank on it like the sun rising in the morning.
This week we've got some great material from Auburn, Tennessee, Notre Dame, Michigan, USC, and Miami. All six took it on the chin this past weekend and, well, let's just say that none of the six took it particularly well. As usual, we've got it all this week... abortions, dikes, snipers, toilet bowls, group boycotts, Fear the Thumb, Daniel Moore speculations, the Detroit Lions, bribing officials, Krusty the Clown, Wild Turkey, Hormel Spam... You name it, and we've got it. Of course, the language gets very rough, so once again consider yourself warned.
And without further adieu, it's meltdown time...
ALL the recruiting in the world won't fix this. We have the worst coached defense in the conference and it looks like we still love going into Tubershell when we get up by more than 10 points. I blame the coaches totally for this loss!
I am seriously starting to question the intelligence of Auburn fans.
What sucks is us losing by 28 to Bama and then going to a shi$ bowl and losing to a shi$ team. So, we lose 3 straight to end the season ending 7-6. This may very well hurt the guys actually signing in February. A verbal commitment doesn't mean anything if we look like shi$ and the kids change their mind and go elsewhere.
I HOPE this doesn't happen. GOD get us out of the college football toilet.
And, yes, Todd takes too many sacks and, if pressured, makes TERRIBLE decisions. And of course the O-line is weak. And Ziemba just may be retarded.
Who truly believes we have a chance against Bama?
Bama 41 Auburn 20
More like 45-13. Bammers D is the best I have seen in many years.
Zero chance of winning this game. The score will be 14-3 at the half with a final of 42-3.
I really don't think most of this board realizes the differences in talent on these 2 teams. Alabama has 5 star players on their D that never play.
Ted Roof was a loser at Minnesota and is a loser now. What an idiotic hire by Chiznik
How Bad Does Bama Beat Us?
It'll be similar to last year.
20-28 points
It will be something like 41-14
Just look up the 1948 Iron Bowl for how bad they beat us . . . .
we will need to knock out Ingram, Julio and their o and d lines just to make it even.
Fuck our guys for talking crap when they're in the middle of the worst rushing defensive effort in school history.
I say, OSU 48, 0.
This team has not improved at all from last year. The only difference in the records is that UM played 3 teams that dont even belong in college football.
They are worse than the Lions.
MOST POINTS ever scored by Wisky on Michigan. Thanks RR!!!!
Deal with it people, we're irrelevant. Have been for a couple of years now, and will be for several more. Nothing seen this year to change that. We're coasting on name brand and that's it. We're playing at the level of the Iowa States and Washington States of the world.
Weis should be fired or resign tomorrow. I see no reason for the "evaluated at the end of the season schtick" at this point.
lets pray to god charlie resigns tonight.
Charlie Weis is a fat piece of……well, you all know. For christ’s sake can we get a coach that IS in shape??? How can you respect someone that doesn’t even have respect for their own body. Shame on Charlie Weis and shame on Notre Dame for forking out millions of dollars a year to have him as their coach. Hell, we can’t even beat Navy anymore. They beat us 2 out of the last 3 years. Shame on Notre Dame. I’m seriously thinking of rooting for a good school like Penn State. Go Nittany Lions!
This is pathetic.
Let`s move on....start the search for new leadership....NOW!!
I am not watching another ND game, until Weis is gone.
Next ND game I watch will be coached by a competent coach, or I am done watching, after 43 years....
Could be worse...easly could be 2-8..
The fact is he is not a head coach -- he has been pathetic the last three years.
With 5000 male students on campus do you think ND could find one kid who can punt a football over 40 yards?
Pull out the dollars, even the Benjamins ... any officials that inept must be corrupt. Time to bribe 'em.
I think we can all agree that the recruiting services for ND are too high
Do it now! Fire the whole staff before they even get on the freaking bus.
The collective body language of this team is an absolute embarassment.
ND is not an elite football program and hasn't been for quite a while now
How many will Stanford hang on us?
63 sounds right to me. I'd say at least 50.
At least 70????
50 sounds about right
Charlie is horrible -- we will lose out
OMG THE SKY IS FALLING!
Sorry Gator Bowl, your too good for us
Swarbrick-FIRE CHARLIE TONIGHT!
He is a dead man walking...the team knows it and has packed it in...
Thats it, Fire him TONIGHT!!
The punter should have his scholarship revoked, seriously. I have never attacked a player but this guy is the worst starting player that I have ever seen at ND.
He may be the worst d 1 player in the country. Its kind of funny how much they practice and he still cant punt.
For all his love of ND, Charlie may well have killed ND as a football power.
I don't think that it's going to get any worse, unless they hire Krusty the Clown as head coach.
but what do I know, I am resorting to Wild Turkey and Kahlua just to get through the Pitt game at the moment...
Which loss is worse? Michigan or Navy?
THIS IS UTTERLY EMBARRASSING!!! I can't take this anymore. I will no longer watch ND until Weis is gone!!!!
Look at the good side, at least we aren't being manhandled by Navy this week.
I have seen better tackling at Pee-Wee football games than what I see.
Fire everyone! Including the Leprechaun guy. ALL of them!!!!!!
Can we release the defense from their scholarships and sign a 50 man recruiting class?
Resign
AAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAD IT. WEIS HAS TO GO TOMORROW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS MESSAGE SHOULD HAVE SOME SIGNIFICANCE!!!!!!!!!!! DO SOMETHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We are not who we thought we were!
We have to much talented players for SC to get it's ASS KICKED at HOME LIKE THIS!
We need a change!
Hey, at least we had a great tailgate...
When did USC Peak and Start Coming Down?
It was a slow decline but now we have fallen off a cliff.
Mark Sanchez made the right choice
Hackett... never had a loss that bad... something to think about
The SC football program has gone over the cliff and Pete Carroll is the only one to blame.
These coaches HATE Joe McKnight. The absolutely HATE HIM! If I was Joe Mcknight I would beat the shyt out of Jeremy Bates then stuff his head down a crap filled toilet.
This idiot is the absolute WORST coach usc has EVER had in ANY compacity
Go to hell Jeremy Bates!
Given the talent disrepancy between the 2001 and 2009 teams, I say 2009 has been the worst year of the PC era.
Look at the staff and you'll see why top talent is shunning SC and why we are where we are despite all these "top" recruiting classes. I said years ago that Pete was dragging the program down the backside of the curve. We are there now. Good news, though. Tickets will be readily available and affordable. Less traffic, too. Welcome to the Pete Hackett era. Put a fork in it, this program is done until Pete ditches his BS and hires quality coaches for whom kids will play.
Who's going to El Paso?!
Sunshine pumpers? Where are you now? This team has fallen apart. The decline is now in full Florida State/Miami mode. Carroll looks absolutely lost, the team is playing with no heart, no energy, getting absolutely mauled.
Defense is full of chicken shits that are afraid to get physical.
Stanford guys laughing at us! I've seen it all now
This is the low point in the Pete Carroll era. Mark my words, the national media attention will wane, recruiting will suffer - and this very well could be the end of an era. Boos in the Coliseum? Never happened since 2000
the NCAA is ready to provide us the boom with sanctions.
This feels like having a super model girlfriend completely let herself go and fatten up to 200lbs.
Brando has an orgasm reporting USC / Stanford score...
Our LB'ers are complete shit!!!
Hey dumb fuck, this is the worst performance by a USC defense in the entire history of USC football.
Sun Bowl here we come!
Jacory Harris, Spence and all of the so "called" saviours will be JUNIORS next season and we still have yet to compete for an ACC title. Lets also not forget that the ACC could possibly be the worst conference in college football.
The entire defensive line minus Allen Bailey is garbage.
just go out and PAY GRUDEN THE $$$
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oh yaaa
the barners are really sweating us
"There's a lot of blood, sweat and guts between dreams and success." PBB
by Pachyderm Pride on Nov 17, 2009 7:53 AM CST reply actions
Funny
That damn Tennessee orange truck upside down at the Mississippi state line.. priceless.
Ole Miss football 2009. I shaved my balls for this?
by BimBamOleMissByDamn on Nov 17, 2009 8:06 AM CST reply actions
By far my favorite:
I really don’t think most of this board realizes the differences in talent on these 2 teams. Alabama has 5 star players on their D that never play.
UT's new recruiting slogan: You can go to USCe and WORK at a gas station or come to UT and ROB that gas station.
"Stanford guys laughing at us! I've seen it all now"
LMAO!
I live in Utah but HATE the Utes! Roll TIDE, Roll!
Man, some epic stuff today. We’re going to embarrass Awbrun and there’s not a damn thing they can do about it. And they know it!
how about we wait till nov. 28
to start gloating? while the odds certainly seem to be in our favor, if there is one game where that might not matter it is this one.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
Agreed
Sure, it’s great to see fear and despair in your opponent’s fan base, especially the barners,, but I have zero doubt that the guys wearing the uniforms will show up to play. Yeah, I think we’ll win, but I would never take it for granted. Those Auburn fans are just getting anesthetized, lining up the booze early. We should not be uncorking champagne.
You can't win. You can't break even. You can't get out of the game.
by StablerRaider on Nov 17, 2009 9:19 AM CST up reply actions
I have six employees who graduated from the Barn
and they all came up to me this week just wanting to keep the game respectable. Sounded like us for a couple of Shula years…I almost felt sorry for them.
Especially one of the trainers. Italian and HOT!
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
by BamaReturns07 on Nov 17, 2009 5:06 PM CST up reply actions
I almost felt sorry for them.
that’s just adorable.
now, how about you think about that for a full ten seconds and then think about this…
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
Lets also not forget....
"A demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots." -H. L. Mencken
you need to check your dates
you can wait til nov. 28th, however, the game is the 27th, and you can bet your bottom dollar alabama will be the victors. no way auburn stands a chance against this defense. last year is gonna seem like a tea party compared to this one. ROLL TIDE TOLL
Good and Bad
Prego wife + AU loss = miserable night
The good is that it made me laugh. The bad is that it means that they’re reproducing.
http://www.rivalryesq.com/
The quintessential Big Ten smoking room.
on the plus side...
I didn’t wear my lucky underwear.
suggests that vols fans are having only sporadic success at the same.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
In full disclosure
I’ve been wearing darn near the same outfit every saturday all year with slight tweaks for weather and such. This includes my undies.
I can understand where this guy is coming from.
I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk.
by That Other Dave on Nov 17, 2009 3:36 PM CST up reply actions
i hear you
i was recently describe as “retarded” but “in the nicest way possible” for my own superstitions in relation to my beloved crimson tide.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
During the Dubose Era
I clipped my fingernails before everygame because we won after I did that one time. They are just now growing back
I'm in no condition to drive...wait! I shouldn't listen to myself, I'm drunk.
by That Other Dave on Nov 17, 2009 4:04 PM CST up reply actions
which served the bonus benifit
of limiting you ability to claw your eyes out at losses due to his idiotic playcalling.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
HA HA HA HA HA
I might go huntin during the bama game Id rather see a deer get killed than us.
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
one of my closest friends
is in grad school down there and he gave me his student ticket for that very same reason. Gun season opens and he told me he’d rather spend his time freezing in the woods than watch his team get “embarrassed”
"Well Eli, Smokey just came out of the tunnel, and he's about 100 yards away from me now, and if I had my deer rifle I believe I could drop him, back to you Eli" -- Jerry Duncan's comments to Eli Gold just prior to kickoff against Tennessee
by Thomas Walker Esq on Nov 17, 2009 12:41 PM CST up reply actions
I really think they are HONESTLY conceeding defeat already.
I am still amazed at how quickly Saban has turned us around. Damn. We are already loaded, and really just an elite QB away from being nigh unstoppable.
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
by BamaReturns07 on Nov 17, 2009 5:08 PM CST up reply actions
The
thing that has to be most distressing for Auburn fans is that even while Alabama was on probation and had mediocre to poor coaches, the discrepancy between the two was never as wide as it is today. And its happened, as you pointed out, in such a short time. That reality has to be hard to deal with.
"A demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots." -H. L. Mencken
shannon
I love the Miami hatred. Shannon goes 3-1 through the opening month and he’s a shoe-in for COTY, now they’re gonna wrap up 9-3 and they all want to fire him.
As a Heels alumnist I love it.
ItsFELDER
by MichaelFelder on Nov 17, 2009 8:58 AM CST via mobile reply actions
This feels like having a super model girlfriend completely let herself go and fatten up to 200lbs.
^^^ that’s the winner…sums up USC football right now…
ahahahahaha…
enjoy...
This thread is truly special..
you should have to pay admission for this kind of fun on a Tuesday morning.
At the end of the day
So CNS is a marsupial now?
“And all the while their devil coach stands on the sidelines and grins like a possum”
Ok now kids, everyone who has ever seen CNS actually ‘grin’ please raise your hands.
That one made me spit coffee on my darn keyboard.
So CNS is a marsupial now?
“And all the while their devil coach stands on the sidelines and grins like a possum”
Ok now kids, everyone who has ever seen CNS actually ‘grin’ please raise your hands.
That one made me spit coffee on my darn keyboard.
The CNS hate
I am not suprised by. If you’re an Alabama fan you get one of two things from others: Hate or contempt. After 10 years of the latter, I’m ok with the former.
As far as respect goes, that is never given, only earned. After 10 years without it, it’s good to see it showing up strong again.
"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog." - Bear Bryant
Priceless
Too damn funny for a Tuesday morning. From the barners’ suicide notes to that overturned orange truck at the Mississippi line, too funny. Nothing from MSU? after all that talk of playing their opponents close—which they did—and the possibiity of a breakout against us, there must be some Bullpups crying in their beer.
You can't win. You can't break even. You can't get out of the game.
Have you been to that blog?
DEAD
Lee Corso: How would you describe tailgating at Alabama?
Kirk Herbstreit: Barbecue and Ralph Lauren
by animalcracker on Nov 17, 2009 7:50 PM CST up reply actions
This one kills me......
“The only reason I’m not watching it this year for the first time in my life is that I don’t believe Auburn will be allowed to win…..so even if lightening should strike twice (1989, 2009), I don’t think the SEC will let that game play out naturally.”
-
This is one of the reasons I hate the barn. Even when their team sucks they can’t accept a legit beatdown as the real deal. It’s always someone elses fault other than their own.
Your temper brings dishonor to my happy mooshu palace.
You are correct.
I have a lot of Auburn friends and after UGA they all thought they were robbed somehow. They can just never admit that their team is just no good. The whole world, especially Alabama, is one giant conspiracy against the forces of good at Auburn.
I hate the NCAA more than UT & AU combined. At least with UT & AU you got a fighting chance.
well, i think we should be fair here...
and say it’s less that their team is no good than they aren’t as good as other teams in the conference. the barn has done better with what it’s got on hand than anyone expected this year.
of course that distinction does nothing to mitigate your point about their idiotic (and epically ironic) reflext to credit any loss to cheating by the opposing program.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
Kleph + big words = awesome
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
by BamaReturns07 on Nov 17, 2009 5:09 PM CST up reply actions
it's what happens to your style...
when you get paid by column length.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
Seriously delusional people those barnturds.
Last year my Ex-roommate (the hugest barn turd homer of all time) was all like if Saban hadn’t of cheated and called timeout before the fg in the second quarter. Awbarn would have had the momentum going into half-time and would have came back out and won. I replied you are an idiot.
I was talking to him last night and he was bitching that no one was talking about Tate for Heisman when he had a couple more yards then Ingram two weeks ago. I was like A. He is on a team that is not winning big games B. He played one more game and had 40+ more carries at the time. Such a delusional homer. He is like you just wait throw out all the records for the Iron Bowl it is always close. I replied that is what you said last year.
36-0
"If wanting to win is a fault, as some of my critics seem to insist, then I plead guilty. I like to win. I know no other way. It's in my blood."- The Bear
by Bham03UAgrad on Nov 17, 2009 10:45 AM CST up reply actions
they took the same
Belly-aching 101 class as Kiffin
"Well Eli, Smokey just came out of the tunnel, and he's about 100 yards away from me now, and if I had my deer rifle I believe I could drop him, back to you Eli" -- Jerry Duncan's comments to Eli Gold just prior to kickoff against Tennessee
by Thomas Walker Esq on Nov 17, 2009 12:17 PM CST up reply actions
I have to say, watching the Auburn game the other night, I was thinking what many of them were thinking: If their o-line can’t even slow down Georgia’s pass rush, how in the hell are they even going to keep Chris Todd alive, let alone upright long enough to throw a pass?
I'm wrong all the time.
if to defeat your enemy you must become your enemy...
then i’ll just settle for simply outgunning the bastards.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
I'm hoping for a bumper sticker day
“Honk if you sacked Chris Todd”
Brodie deserves more than a little payback.
by DurhamO on Nov 17, 2009 10:36 AM CST up reply actions 1 recs
FTW!
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
by BamaReturns07 on Nov 17, 2009 5:10 PM CST up reply actions
They know it too...
…and they expressed that sentiment in all it’s misspelled Barner glory. My favorite of all the comments to that end was the one in the double box that just said “they’re going to kill us”. Beautiful.
by Queen of the Universe on Nov 17, 2009 11:12 AM CST up reply actions
THEY'LL KILL US!!!!
"Underlying most arguments against the free market is a lack of belief in freedom itself." -- Milton Friedman
by outsidethesidelines on Nov 17, 2009 12:10 PM CST up reply actions
Woo Hoo!!!
Bonus Meltdown Thread Simpsons Reference! loves it.
by Queen of the Universe on Nov 17, 2009 4:03 PM CST up reply actions
Good stuff!
Hey I read on alot of forums but kudos to you OTS, I look forward to this every Tuesday.
Nothing gets your morning started better than some other teams agony.
BWAHAHAHA!
MOST POINTS ever scored by Wisky on Michigan. Thanks RR!!!!
Yeah. Thanks RR (Rita Rod)! We dodged a major bullet!
Roll Tide! Beat the Moccasins?! Mockingbirds?!
Tell me about it!
She is more appreciated in the state of Alabama than she might think!
UT's new recruiting slogan: You can go to USCe and WORK at a gas station or come to UT and ROB that gas station.
"Thank Ya'll! Rich and I miss WV! And hooters!"
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
by BamaReturns07 on Nov 17, 2009 5:11 PM CST up reply actions
Night of the Living Dead....
"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban
by NiceLittleSaturday on Nov 17, 2009 9:03 PM CST up reply actions
Love child of
The Crypt Keeper and Dolly Parton.
I'm wrong all the time.
by PeteHoliday on Nov 17, 2009 10:05 PM CST up reply actions
Came across the obits in the Knox News today an all I could think was “lucky fuckers”
McClusterfucked!
"this defense couldn't stop a girl's volleyball team"
Ha! This made me smile…
Tuesday Meltdown with my morning coffee makes for an awesome rest of the day…
by Queen of the Universe on Nov 17, 2009 11:04 AM CST reply actions
We need to
print up all the Auburn comments and mail the whole dossier to every player and coach in the greater Opelika area. Embrace the hurt, Barners.
by Darby Up The Middle on Nov 17, 2009 11:16 AM CST reply actions
Can't stop laughing at......
Came across the obits in the Knox News today an all I could think was “lucky fuckers”
That has to be the best meltdown post I’ve ever seen.
The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his. ~General George S. Patton~
How long til the barners
find these Meltdown threads and either a). post about it on TET or b). start flaming us and bringing up 6-in-a-row?
It is important to find someone who allows you to fulfill your dreams. It is luck if that person finds you, too - Isaiah Zagar
a). post about it on TET
Where have you been?
Along with Jay’s amateurish attempt to contribute to the “Let’s delegitimize Alabama’s success” template.
"A demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots." -H. L. Mencken
As we see, Miami fans are much like their team once was...
…a bunch of thugs. They reference shooting their coach, not once but twice. They are also the most vulgar of the meltdown maniacs.
Auburn and Tennessee fans are a lot like Slinkys...neither are worth much but you do get a sense of satisfaction from pushing them down a flight of stairs
All things considered
Not that much of a meltdown by Tennessee fans. Only the most mild of the Tennessee ones were taken from RTT, I’m somewhat proud to say. Does this cement us as the best Tennessee blog out there?
Still, this has to be my favorite:
Came across the obits in the Knox News today an all I could think was “lucky fuckers”
Because, to be quite honest, I agree. Funny how none of those comments talked about the offense being held to 17 points, either … I was so scared about the Ole Miss game leading up to it because, quite frankly, McCluster is amazing. How come you Alabamians got Ole Miss BEFORE Nutt realized “oh, McCluster > Snead”?
Tennessee Fans: We win at teh Internet!
because we had javy on the field and you guys didn't have janzen
mccluster had a beast of a game but he was also at the right place at the right time. losing your free safety days before the contest was a hell of a blow. between the absence of that player and the disruption to the secondary as a unit the defense was off-balance from the start.
it’s a situation we recognize in the most painful way imaginable. ask us about our sugar bowl performance sometime.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
Who did South Carolina have?
And yeah, Janen was the major ‘stop the big play’ guy, which we WERE best in the nation at. That and our losses in the Linebacking Corps had us thin thin thin.
Tennessee Fans: We win at teh Internet!
by bobo_the_vol on Nov 18, 2009 2:27 PM CST up reply actions
it’s certainly not the only reason he feasted on the UT defense, but it certainly was a big part of the entree.
Roll 'Bama Roll: The Champagne of 'Bama Blogs.
Hi everyone.
I hope y’all dont mind; I’m stopping by from RCR. I love this meltdown piece. I’m a solid OM fan, but anybody who puts together such a hilarious column is ok with me. Thanks for the laughs, and I can’t wait to see what you find for LSU this week.
by TheOnlySouthernMissRebelFan on Nov 22, 2009 6:21 PM CST reply actions
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