Wait, I COULD have been a jock?!

Any and all athletic ambition I may have ever had quickly vanished in the 2nd grade when, after running a mile in PE, I broke down in tears from the throbbing pain coursing through my knees and had to be taken to the emergency room.  Blame my Mother; her side of the family is full of artificial this and thats (she has a fake hip herself) and I myself have had two procedurs done to my left knee and have been told that I will need to get that right one looked at pretty soon.  From 2nd to 8th grade, when PE as a required course mercifully ended, I was allowed to walk the required mile each year, and even then I "miscounted" the number of laps I had completed until the coaches would finally get fed up and let me go sit on the bleachers until the end of the period.  So even though I loved the game of football from darn near the cradle, actually taking part in any sort of organized sport was never an option for me which I regret to this very day.  Sadly my collegiate career is well over, because hope has finally arrived for us poor souls who wanted to be jocks, really we did, but just didn't have the physical tools to get there.  From the Harvard Crimson:

In the last few weeks, 23 of North America’s top universities have signed up to join a brand-new competitive collegiate league. Students from McGill, Princeton, Stanford, University of Chicago, Yale, and Harvard have answered an irresistible call: the opportunity to introduce an entirely new game into the hallowed halls of college sports.

Instead of pads and helmets, this sport merely requires a computer, keyboard, mouse, and Internet connection. These tools are standard for any college student, and travel costs are negligible, since the opposing teams can play each other online.

That's right, friends, computer gaming is now a collegiate sport.  The Ivy Leaguers are playing something nerdy, of course, but it's only a matter of time before the southern schools ramp it up with something like Madden or the NCAA series.  Can't you just imagine an SEC where Vandy has a legitimate chance to win the conference? Where the Iron Bowl Rivalry really is a 365 day a year event? Where Mississippi State's telekinetic DEs will wreak horrifying havoc in opposing backfields? It will be glorious...

The future is now, friends.