Dear Auburn, With your football contest against my alma mater now less than a week away, I feel...

Dear Auburn,

With your football contest against my alma mater now less than a week away, I feel this is an appropriate time for me to remind you of my feelings for you. I hate you. I hate your backward little cow college. I hate your players, coaches, students, administrators, fans, alumni, janitors, and cafeteria workers. I hate your multiple mascots. I hate you to the point I root for both Alabama and Al Qaeda against you. I hate the fact your supporters, with their cow feces caked work boots, will be allowed inside Neyland Stadium next week. I hate you to the point that I have rooted for Texas to defeat you. I hate you so viciously that I don't even root for you against Vanderbilt, I simply hope the ground opens up and swallows both teams and their supporters. I hate you enough to hope you go winless and scoreless every season.

I hope this clears up any ambiguity about my thoughts regarding your institution and its supporters. Have a nice day.

Sincerely,

Hatvol96

This one comes straight off Vol Nation. I tell you, aside from the whole being a Tennessee fan, I think this guy has got it figured out.

5 months ago outsidethesidelines 8 comments 0 recs |

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I don't get the part about hating Vandy.

I didn’t think anyone hated Vandy.

What you're seeing is team spirit. It's like the Holy Spirit, but more powerful.

-Hank Hill

by Zoltar on Sep 28, 2009 1:36 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs

Re: Vanderbilt

I went to the Bama – Vandy game in Nashville in ‘07 and heard some pretty nasty stuff tossed our way from the 7-8 of their fans that bothered to show up. I used to pull for them as the ultimate underdog, as the great academic institution in our conference, etc. I’ve subsequently decided they’re in tier two of the conference hate. Tier one being Auburn, Tennessee, LSU and Florida. Vandy was in tier three by themselves, but they graduated to tier two that day. I figure if they all hate us, I’m not saving any sympathy for them.

RollBamaRoll.com

by Nico2.0 on Sep 28, 2009 3:50 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs