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It's Just Too Good NOT to Use...

When kleph came up with the idea for a "Moral Victory National Championship" we sent out a request via the Twitter for a special trophy to go to the winner.  Something funny happened on the way to the schadenfreude, though, when everyone got the joke and took it pretty well.  Feeling like actually going through the process of taking a vote and running the bracket to it's conclusion would be belaboring the point, we let the single post stand on it's own but forgot to e-mail the incredibly talented person who volunteered to do our photoshopping for us and save her some effort.  But since this is too awesome to just let sit in the e-mails, and because blogging has produced so much negative exposure to everyone else's fans that I've grown incredibly hateful towards every other team in the country (besides UConn, who represented very well at the papajohns.com bowl, go Huskies!), so much so that every game not involving the Tide has become a meteor game for me, I'm posting it anyway:

Cry_baby_trophy_medium
CONGRATULATIONS!

Yep, all y'all who cried about Colt McCoy have got yourselves a trophy, too, 'cause Lord knows with him Texas would have scored approximately 187 TDs based on the "shredding" of Alabama's defense on the first drive. All y'all that think Alabama is one of the worst undefeated national champions and somehow stole our real title and don't deserve it, you got yourself a trophy, too. For everyone that wanted to sneer at the trophy being displayed at Wal-Mart (despite the clear logistical sense it made, as well as precedent), here's one you can display wherever you think is fitting. And just for good measure, for every rival fan that assured us our time was done, we'd never be able to hire a good coach again, we'd never be able to pass Auburn/Tennesse/Florida/LSU in recruiting, and that our mercenary coach would jump right back to the NFL/Notre Dame/LSU/USC (oops, wrong team)/Wherever Will Pay Him More after two seasons, here's a trophy for you.  Make sure and share it with everyone that thinks we ought to be gracious about all this and lay off the taunting, too, 'cause, you know, it's not like we've had to put up with all y'alls crap for a decade or anything.  So enjoy, and us dumb cracker assholes will be down here with our trophy, happy to know we could give a little something back in these troubled times.  Roll Tide.

Update: On further reflection, the following fanbases may join UConn in escaping my scorn; Florida, Utah, Boise State, TCU, and Wisconsin.  Their allotted hate will instead go towards Ohio State.  Y'all want to make fun of us for being rednecks?  Head up there.  They are light years ahead of us in the field of White Trashery.

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Thank you so much, Todd!

This was PERFECT and I’ll be sure to forward a link to this post to all of my A-barn, Tennessee, and Texas buddies!

Roll Tide!

After spending seven wondrous years in the state of Alabama, never in my life have I seen fans, who claim to be loyal to one team, spend more time AUbsessing over the other more so than they do their very own.

by SanFranDude12 on Jan 17, 2010 11:46 AM CST reply actions  

Gorgeous.

Props to the artist.

University of Tennessee : Where Schadenfreude Happens

by rco3 on Jan 17, 2010 12:03 PM CST reply actions  

I imagine it being real small, too...

like the one that everyone gets just for participating in tee-ball…

enjoy...

by SpockJenkins on Jan 17, 2010 12:06 PM CST reply actions  

Although it would be fun to hand it out and say...

…here’s your big baby, you big baby….

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 17, 2010 2:29 PM CST up reply actions  

Priceless.

I always new Tide fans had more class than other fanbases, but the last week or so has really reinforced that notion to me. I hope Saban’s words from yesterday turn out to be truly prophetic, because nothing would give me greater pleasure than continuing to watch all these little bit@%es squirm.

P.S. Instead of THE COACHES’ TROPHY it should read THE WHINY LITTLE BIT@%ES TROPHY

"I don’t care if they put three guys on me," Cody said. "I don’t care about tackles, and I don’t care about numbers. I care about winning games, and we’ve got one more to win." - The Legend of Terrence Cody

by lcase373 on Jan 17, 2010 12:15 PM CST reply actions  

Look at Todd...

…firing missiles on a Sunday morning.

RollBamaRoll.com - Also check out my music blog: Hear the World

by Nico2.0 on Jan 17, 2010 12:25 PM CST reply actions  

Tell me there’s a button on it to make it actually make crying sounds! Oh they taste so sweet!

by d12 on Jan 17, 2010 12:25 PM CST reply actions  

And real tears squirt from the eyes.

LOL ALL DAY!

Beat Auburn? CHECK. 12-0 regular season? CHECK. Beat the #1 Gators for the SECCG? CHECK. Ingram wins the Heisman? CHECK. Tide defeats the Longhorns for the BCS Championship? CHECK!

by UtahBammer on Jan 17, 2010 1:06 PM CST up reply actions  

I'm with you

on Florida. As much as I hate those Gators their fans, at least the ones I know personally, actually pulled for us in the BCSNCG and have nothing but good to say after our win.

I wish they wouldn’t have been so nice because I like to not like them. But Tebow crying has maybe humbled some of them. I just hate the fact that I might have to start pulling for UF.

But I can’t go along with you on Boise St.

I hate the NCAA more than UT & AU combined. At least with UT & AU you got a fighting chance.

by 5026 on Jan 17, 2010 12:26 PM CST reply actions  

Florida = Utah

By that I mean, it seems like a good many Florida fans reacted to their ass-whuppin the way a good many Bama fans reacted to our ass-whuppin in last year’s Sugar Bowl. Sure, we had a few what-iffers and whiners, but most of us were like, “Hmm, looks like we got our ass kicked. Congrats Utes, you deserved it.” I mean, what else could we say???

"That rug really tied the room together."

by pantsfucious on Jan 17, 2010 12:29 PM CST up reply actions  

HAHA

Too f’in funny. Bravo.

"That rug really tied the room together."

by pantsfucious on Jan 17, 2010 12:26 PM CST reply actions  

Wisconsin?

From what I can gather, they hate us too.

RollBamaRoll.com - Also check out my music blog: Hear the World

by Nico2.0 on Jan 17, 2010 12:30 PM CST reply actions  

The only Wisconsin fan I know...

likes us, so they’re ok with me.

Roll Bama Roll - The Champagne of Bama Blogs.

by Todd on Jan 17, 2010 12:34 PM CST up reply actions  

There's more than one Wisconsin fan?

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 17, 2010 2:30 PM CST up reply actions  

that's 1 more than the amount of UAB fans

"Yeah, it's Tennessee, that's the way it is sometimes." - Corey Zickefoose, Pulitzer Prize winner and robbery victim

"This is not the end. This is the beginning." - The Great and Powerful Saban

by Thomas Walker Esq on Jan 17, 2010 3:47 PM CST up reply actions  

Sssshhhh...

…Todd’s listening….

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 17, 2010 3:49 PM CST up reply actions  

There are at least seven of us....

….so shut your whore mouth.

Roll Bama Roll - The Champagne of Bama Blogs.

by Todd on Jan 17, 2010 4:13 PM CST up reply actions  

Told ya.

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 17, 2010 4:31 PM CST up reply actions  

Never met any Wisconsin fans, but I like them.

Remember the 2006 Cap One Bowl when Wisconsin handed Auburn their sorry asses? As time expired, Badger fans started up the “Overrated” cheer. They all scored points for the afterlife as far as I’m concerned.

Steers & Queers

by Mr. Kobayashi on Jan 18, 2010 1:25 PM CST up reply actions  

Congratulations

Congrats on the National Title. Texas is pissed because they got their d!ck smashed by Alabama. It’s texas’ s fault that they didn’t get their second string qb enough experience. That’s something a national title team would have done. The best team in the nation has the deepest depth chart; texas doesn’t.

They can’t say “if McCoy wasn’t hurt we would have won!” because it didn’t happen that way. I’m always glad to see Texas lose. It’s even better to see them lose to an sec school. Good luck next season!

by Razorback1477 on Jan 17, 2010 12:39 PM CST reply actions  

Thank You.

Good luck to your squad next year as well, except for 9/25 of course :)

"I don’t care if they put three guys on me," Cody said. "I don’t care about tackles, and I don’t care about numbers. I care about winning games, and we’ve got one more to win." - The Legend of Terrence Cody

by lcase373 on Jan 17, 2010 1:23 PM CST up reply actions  

Its understandable not to have your #2 QB ready...

…but if you haven’t developed a damn running back in the past two years and suddenly need one? Coaching fail.

Roll Bama Roll - The Champagne of Bama Blogs.

by Todd on Jan 17, 2010 2:30 PM CST up reply actions  

Meh

The RB’s have been developed fine. Its an Offensive Line fail, but nonetheless, great win.

Get off your knees Greg, you're blowin' the game.

by kriess on Jan 18, 2010 9:06 AM CST up reply actions  

I guess...

…he meant if you haven’t developed a running game in the past two years…but we know how hard it is to recruit well in Texas.

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 18, 2010 9:25 AM CST up reply actions  

No, I think you're mis-understanding me

We haven’t developed a decent offensive line since the days of 2006. Our RBs are fine, and we certainly have plenty to go around. And Todd is right, it is a coaching fail at the O-Line Coach Mac McWhorter, as we constantly get the best pick out of offensive linemen in the country each year, but do nothing with them. McWhorter seems to be retiring this year, and hopefully we can get back to the good ole days of running the ball.

Its not a personnel problem. Its a coaching/scheme problem. And yes, it is very difficult to recruit in Texas. ;)

Get off your knees Greg, you're blowin' the game.

by kriess on Jan 18, 2010 10:43 AM CST up reply actions  

Well...

….not developing a good run blocking o-line is the same net result. My point is that Texas hasn’t produced a credible rushing threat outside of Colt McCoy in the last two years and it came back to bite them big time. I’ll amend my statement to “but if you haven’t developed a damn running GAME in the past two years and suddenly need one? Coaching fail.”

Roll Bama Roll - The Champagne of Bama Blogs.

by Todd on Jan 18, 2010 10:56 AM CST up reply actions  

Don't get me wrong, Todd

I’m not disagreeing with you at all. Our piss-poor run block scheme bit us hard against y’all in Pasadena. I was just clarifying, if we had a decent O-Line, we would have one of the most productive running games in the nation in my honest opinion. Just making sure the blame goes to the right folks, ya know.

This is the improvement that every Texas fan desperately wants to see by August.

Get off your knees Greg, you're blowin' the game.

by kriess on Jan 18, 2010 3:12 PM CST up reply actions  

Normally I wouldn't agree with this (and think most of you woudn't either)

But usually the winning team doesn’t have to put up with the bullcrap that we have and we won by a large margin..
Then again we did make Superman cry, so i guess we should expect to hear SOME crying but damn.
Excellent Job Todd ! All of the whiners deserve it.

'Mark Ingram' is the Heisman Winner!

by rmathis on Jan 17, 2010 1:29 PM CST reply actions  

So then we can say...

That McElroy wears kryptonite pajamas?

by 13thBama on Jan 18, 2010 10:30 AM CST up reply actions  

Lex Luthor wears Greg McElroy pajamas....

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 18, 2010 3:05 PM CST up reply actions  

Roll Tide. If any of you need to read some more articles on Bama just look around the nation. But don't post cause then your a troll.

8 or 13 It's more than your school. You can call Bama's fans what you want while your thinking of the national title.

by Destindune on Jan 17, 2010 2:36 PM CST reply actions  

This...

is AWESOME. Thank you for posting it. It’s even better than those posts of the fake Auburn Championship rings…

Best. Losers. Trophy. Ever.

by Queen of the Universe on Jan 17, 2010 4:11 PM CST reply actions  

Thank you!

This was a really satisfying post. I think you nailed exactly what so many of us are thinking. Reading so much negativity about the Tide’s win has me really wondering how much these so called fans truly understand about the game of football. Last I checked it is in fact a contact sport and sometimes it’s more about preparing for the unexpected than it is preparing for the perfect situation.

by sixfoot7 on Jan 17, 2010 4:25 PM CST reply actions  

IMO

This is the single, greatest post I have ever seen on RBR. Even though I have only been reading here for two years. Todd, way to go man. Nobody could have said it better. I have no direct ties to Alabama, but I was raised there and have always pulled for the team that was named after our great state! Roll Tide!!!!

by AlltheGreatQBs on Jan 17, 2010 4:33 PM CST reply actions  

well,

no ties to the University that is…..

by AlltheGreatQBs on Jan 17, 2010 4:34 PM CST reply actions  

you know?

I didn’t go to Alabama either and everybody I know makes fun of me for being such a big fan. “How can you love the team so much when you didn’t go there?” they say…

  It’s a little less annoying now that we won a national title…

by Queen of the Universe on Jan 17, 2010 4:37 PM CST up reply actions  

I didn't go to UA either ...

I got a partial scholarship but still couldn’t swing it. (Big regret, but that’s another story.)

I hate that argument. To me, it’s like saying you can’t cheer for the the Titans unless you live in Tennessee. Who cares if all the fans didn’t go to the school?

"There's no substitute for guts."

by SoundCheckMama on Jan 17, 2010 7:09 PM CST up reply actions  

Hmmm...

…my mom didn’t go to Alabama…I guess I better call her up and tell her she can’t root for the Tide anymore. Dad, too. Man…are they gonna be bummed….

For that matter, CNS never went to school at Alabama…I’ll get to work on a letter explaining to him how he shouldn’t get too emotionally involved in the team. He’ll understand….

"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban

by NiceLittleSaturday on Jan 17, 2010 7:31 PM CST up reply actions  

As the lone pickup alum at RBR...

…that argument infuriates me as well. I could have gone to UA (applied and was accepted), but it made better sense financially and logistically for me to stay in Birmingham and go to UAB. Had I gone to UA, my parents would have had to support me financially and I’d have likely had to take out student loans as well. At UAB, I was able to stay at home, work full time, and pay my own way. As much as I would have liked to have spent my college years in Tuscaloosa, basing four (ok, five) years of my life on my football fandom didn’t make any sense. I’d rather have the satisfaction of knowing I worked my butt off and paid for my own education.

Roll Bama Roll - The Champagne of Bama Blogs.

by Todd on Jan 17, 2010 7:43 PM CST up reply actions  

Sidewalks

It’s mostly Barner fans that make that accusation. A Barner coworker recently said that “Most Bama fans are sidewalks,” like that was something clever. When I asked for an explanation, he made that ridiculous accusation we are discussing here. I explained to him that Barners say that shyt because they are bitter that 90% of the state are Bama fans, not Barners, not that it really makes any f’ing difference whether you went to school at The Capstone or not (I did, and I LOVE calling it The Capstone when talking to Barners). Of course, Barner had the great comeback of “You can have ’em.” So, I said, “Thanks! We’ll take them and their money for games and merchandise and stuff and we’ll hire a better coach than yours. Oh, wait; already did! And, we’ll also build a better stadium and better facilities so that we can recruit better players than yours. Oh wait, already did! …” Well, by this point, he was headed down the hall to get away from me, and I was yelling across the office, so I just let him go.

Dr. BamaFrazier is IN!

by BamaFrazier on Jan 17, 2010 8:20 PM CST up reply actions  

Hey Alabama is a nation

not an alumni base. One of my favorite Bama fans of all time was a university student at Phnom Phen University in Cambodia. The kid had never even been to America, but he spoke English, he had the internet, and he loved Alabama. He even had Bama gear he wore to college. I hope someday he makes it to BDS to actually see a game live.

My family has had several go to Alabama (but not me for financial reasons) but if you have a Bama hat on I say ROLL TIDE.

I hate the NCAA more than UT & AU combined. At least with UT & AU you got a fighting chance.

by 5026 on Jan 17, 2010 8:39 PM CST up reply actions  

So,

you guys have gotten that response from other fans (Barners) as well, huh? They also tell me that I shouldn’t pull for the Patriots since I am not from Boston. I tell them that since Alabama does not have a professional football team that I had to pick someone. As a kid, I always pulled for the underdog, and that was New England. It just stuck with me, but I am sure you guys won’t hold that against me……

by AlltheGreatQBs on Jan 18, 2010 1:22 AM CST up reply actions  

Awesome.

St Louis Game Time: Let's Go Blues!
Block U: a blog about the University of Utah

by BoylenOver on Jan 17, 2010 4:48 PM CST reply actions  

Better mass produce those.....

because they’ll be in demand as long as the Tide is on top, and that figures to be a long time. We’ll also need a 4th place heisman runner-up trophy for next year since Ingram, Richardson, and Julio will take the first 3 spots.

by JMusso22 on Jan 17, 2010 5:44 PM CST reply actions  

My parents had always told me when I was younger about the extreme hate that other fans had for Bama back in the glory years. Only now do I understand what they meant and how pathetic the hate truly is.

Bring on the hate because that’s how I know Bama is on top.

by brandonh on Jan 17, 2010 6:12 PM CST up reply actions  

I have a hard time figuring out why people automatically associate white trash with Alabama...

I’m not from Alabama (originally), but I’ve got a lot of family members who are; and I have lived there for quite some time. I’ve also visited almost 15 states over the course of my lifetime and NOT A SINGLE ONE is any better or different than Alabama.

The only differential between them and Alabama is the accents.

But if you’ve talked to anyone who has visited Alabama, they think differently. It’s the people who’ve never visited the state who stereotypes everyone to be white trash hillbillies who have never even seen a paved road. It’s pathetic.

I absolutely LOVE Alabama. It’s not my native state, but one day I plan on moving back and settling down there and referring to myself as an “adopted native”. There is no place like it on Earth and that’s a fact. The people are great. The women are beautiful. The people there still have high morals. The state is beautiful. And lastly, Alabama football is a lifestyle and I want to be in the state of Alabama, around Alabama fans, during football season every year.

After spending seven wondrous years in the state of Alabama, never in my life have I seen fans, who claim to be loyal to one team, spend more time AUbsessing over the other more so than they do their very own.

by SanFranDude12 on Jan 17, 2010 6:41 PM CST reply actions  

Well said.

I hate the NCAA more than UT & AU combined. At least with UT & AU you got a fighting chance.

by 5026 on Jan 17, 2010 8:40 PM CST up reply actions  

I'll be honest

I’ve lost a lot of respect for the Texas program due to their fans carping about the loss. Even Mack Brown’s comments afterward were totally weak.

But more than that think of how the rest of the team feels. All the Texas fans act like McCoy was the only thing good about that team. Like it was no surprise they lost when Cupcake McCoy went down.

Nobody says Bama would’ve lost had Ingram or Julio or McElroy or whoever got hurt. A championship team is built to handle attrition and the fact that Texas couldn’t tells me all I need to know about that team. Flukey, lucky, and poorly built.

This trophy is perfect, engrave it to Mack Brown and mail it to him.

by 13thieves on Jan 17, 2010 7:39 PM CST reply actions   2 recs

Rec +1

Your temper brings dishonor to my happy mooshu palace.

by mulletover on Jan 18, 2010 11:02 AM CST up reply actions  

Welcome to our world

as an Oklahoma fan, this is what we get all the time. Ask any texass fan, and they will tell you they have never lost a game in the entire history of their program.

This cry baby trophy is great and spot on!

Congratulations Alabama for winning the National Championship! You have the REAL trophy and 10 years from now, no one will be asking who #2 was.

"You have been banned from the Purple Row, for Inappropriate conduct, profanity, (&) telling site authors their articles are crap."

by Redhawk on Jan 20, 2010 10:59 AM CST up reply actions  

The Crystal Crybaby

atop “The Tears Trophy”.

I know the real thing hasn’t been called The Sears Trophy since 2001, but it’s just too good to pass up.

by zeke2029 on Jan 18, 2010 9:06 AM CST reply actions  

The Crystal Crybaby

atop “The Tears Trophy”.

I know the real thing hasn’t been called The Sears Trophy since 2001, but it’s just too good to pass up.

by zeke2029 on Jan 18, 2010 9:07 AM CST reply actions  

Todd your by far, my hero....

This write up is perfect. You put into words what I’ve been thinking since January the 8th. It’s great to feel like we Bama fans are on the inside looking out. I no longer have the need to explain anything to opposing fans. I’ll just say,,,,,,,here ya go, an award, just for you! Roll Tide Guys,,Roll Tide!

Your temper brings dishonor to my happy mooshu palace.

by mulletover on Jan 18, 2010 11:00 AM CST reply actions  

I have heard ALL the hate from across the nation...and right hear at home...

At first I wanted to choke every turd with each ridiculous turd statement that was made, from the Texas cry turds to the barner “inferiority at its plymoth complex” turds. But then I thought, this is great…everyone hates UA b/c they are on top, and appear to be going no where quick, and they know it. Most psychologist…errrr shrinks will tell you hate is born of fear and frustration in your ability to change the object of focus…in this case, The U of A. After all, I don’t recall much hate from many when Shula was at the helm…hell, most barn fans thought Shula was “a great guy”…and he was, just not a great coach. So after consideration, all this hate and Bama bashing is a compliment of sorts. So to all you Capstone hating turds far and near…Thank You, you’re anger is a gift (RATM)…here’s your trophy!

by String30 on Jan 19, 2010 10:37 AM CST reply actions  

Comical, to say the least

And, for me, it matters not what Texas says. There is no proof that having McCoy would have made any difference in the outcome. Their defense didn’t prevent points being put on the board and didn’t prevent UA from coming through in the clutch. Congrats!

DWWD -- WDE!

by ATL_AU_FAN on Jan 19, 2010 2:30 PM CST reply actions  

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