According to the classy, Aubarn creed abiding Aubarn men over TET, it's official (and is awaiting to be made public), Nick Saban is going to Michigan!!!! And while that does simply put "suck" there is hope on the frontier...
Considering they're reveling in Alabama's sudden loss, I say we return the favor by snatching up their head coach, Gus Malzahn. That's right AUtards, we're coming for Malzahn. Remember the shit-storm you guys brewed the day Gene Chizik was announced as head coach? Well a new one shall brew after he finishes 3-9 next season, because without Malzahn, the defensive mastermind whose defenses at Aubarn have ranked near the bottom of the barrel, cannot and will not win without him having the luxury of Malzahn as OC.
Even if you guys continue buy which players you want, not even Gene Chizik, alone, can coach them up WITHOUT Gus Malzahn.
Even though you're laughing about our loss, we'll be laughing at you when your former coach's offense is hanging 60+ on your seemingly non-existent defense.
Welcome back Mr. 5-19 and you classy Aubarn people who welcomed him in with harsh criticism and middle fingers are once again going to get what you paid for. Brothers and sisters of the incestuous Aubarn family, go ahead and round up all the pitchforks you can find around the Wire Road trailer park(s) and lower those confederate flags, because Mr. 5-19 is back!!!