Which Bama Starting Linebacker Would You LEAST Want to Be Hit By?
by kleph on Sep 1, 2011 10:20 AM CDT
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Spencer Hall's 100 Absolutely Certain Thoughts about the upcoming college football season includes this humorous listing concerning Don'ta Hightower:
21. You stir in your sleep sometime around three in the morning sometime this fall. Dont'a Hightower glares at you from outside your bedroom window, and mouths "YOU." Don't be worried. He does this to everyone.
20. By "this," I mean "is waiting outside your window to kill you."
19. This is the least frightening thing about Dont'a Hightower.
Which is properly terrifying but, personally, I'd be much more worried if it happened to be Courtney Upshaw due to the evidence you see in the video above. Of course, I'd decline any opportunity to take a full-speed lick from one of the Crimson Tide's starting linebackers because, well, I'm not crazy.
But it does make me wonder... if you had to get hit by one of them for some enormous monetary compensation (and it would have to be really enormous) or to atone for doing something awful (and it would have to be really awful) who would you LEAST want it to be?
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Upshaw spends his off seasons pulling boats into the cold dark depths of the sea
People who live in glass houses should not hang out with Charles Barkley.
Was Upshaw the inspiration of the Kracken mascot?
Mark Barron, y'all.
by twominutedrill on Sep 1, 2011 2:03 PM CDT up reply actions
Hans Zimmer's inspiration: #41
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMU1b7AX5nM
Listen, enjoy, release the Kraken!!!!
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
Vivian, why do you have a girl's name
-(p)rick
"I'm champagne and you're shit." - Jon Lovitz in Happiness
Oi you! Sha'up!
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
What about the 2010 Tennessee game
I think it was like 2 minutes into the game or something and a huge hit was made. I believe it was by Milliner on a wide receiver. Knocked the dude completely stupid and he was down for a few minutes. Does anyone remember that beautiful hit ??
Yeah, it was Dee.
The dude was slipping as he got hit, so it was more of a luck of the draw thing, but it looked amazing in real time.
"Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that." - George Carlin
by Slice of Life on Sep 1, 2011 10:31 AM CDT up reply actions
Crappp
thats right, I forgot about the slip.
Well heres ( raises glass) to more beautiful slipping this year my friends
My DVR is set to implode in the first three days this year.
by lastmilefire on Sep 1, 2011 10:34 AM CDT up reply actions
My favorite quote concerning Upshaw comes from TR
“That dog shows up mad EVERY day”
"If wanting to win is a fault, as some of my critics seem to insist, then I plead guilty. I like to win. I know no other way. It's in my blood." -- Paul "Bear" Bryant
by GeauxCrimson on Sep 1, 2011 10:29 AM CDT reply actions 1 recs
What, no love for Jerrell?
If Auburn was in New Mexico and we never played them I would still hate them and their dumb coach and their cheating players.
spontaneous implies "unexpected" or "for no apparent reason"
They will know exactly why they are defecating on themselves
People who live in glass houses should not hang out with Charles Barkley.
by Wallacewade04 on Sep 1, 2011 11:14 AM CDT via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
Quit now. Before you get real hurt up.
Proud mini-Saban.
by Tidee Whitee on Sep 1, 2011 11:55 AM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Dont'a is making up
for a down year last year having to give in to his knee. He’s going to be excited, angry, AND 100% this year. For that reason, I choose him over Courtney.
Meet it is I set it down that one may smile, and smile, and be a villain--Hamlet, I, v
all of the above should be a choice
Roll Tide!
They are all choices.
'There are two pains in life. There is the pain of discipline and the pain of disappointment. If you can handle the pain of discipline, then you'll never have to deal with the pain of disappointment,'- Nick Saban
Crushed by Hightower?
Or trucked by Trent?
Discuss…
by SoFla Tideroller on Sep 1, 2011 11:39 AM CDT reply actions
Ill take option 3 please
the one where I instead try to stop a Semi- Truck instead. Yes yes that would be preferable
by lastmilefire on Sep 1, 2011 11:43 AM CDT up reply actions
That MSU defender in the CapOne Bowl does not want Trent, part deaux fo sho.
by SoFla Tideroller on Sep 1, 2011 12:00 PM CDT up reply actions
My two sons and I were in the mall last year
and they see Dont’a and Robert Lester. My boys take off in a sprint to meet them. Turns out, both of them were SUPER nice. Never met Upshaw, but I don’t think I would want my kids running up to him, dude scares the crap out of me.
I haven't seen a beatin' like that since somebody stuck a banana in my pants and turned a monkey loose!
Were you in the RV?
'There are two pains in life. There is the pain of discipline and the pain of disappointment. If you can handle the pain of discipline, then you'll never have to deal with the pain of disappointment,'- Nick Saban
Yep, that was me...
wait, what are we talking about again?
I haven't seen a beatin' like that since somebody stuck a banana in my pants and turned a monkey loose!
One of the great philosophical questions of this age
Hightower immediately came to mind when I saw the question, but that’s because I think of Upshaw as a DE instead of a LB. Well, officially, he’s an LB, so that makes it a close question. I voted for Courtney, but Dant’a is a knock-knock-knocker, that’s for sure.
here's the rebuttal to hall's observation
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
Upshaw's sacks
in the Iron Bowl is the only way I’ve kept my sanity…
Alabama Football = Legal Physical Abuse
Sounds like a male escort service.
'There are two pains in life. There is the pain of discipline and the pain of disappointment. If you can handle the pain of discipline, then you'll never have to deal with the pain of disappointment,'- Nick Saban
by J Tadpole on Sep 1, 2011 12:08 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
If I wasn't totally incompetent at posting .gifs...
I’d put up Htower trucking Fluker in A-Day, and he was backing up. I sure wouldn’t want to be standing still!
"It's not the size of the cat in the fight, it's size of the fight in the cat"
"Pep talks... only work when they touch that ember of truth learned the hardest possible way on the field.-Kleph
this one of him
doing the same thing to a florida lineman is much more fun to watch.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
THANK YOU
for properly checking the ‘open link in a new window’ option.
SERIOUSLY wish i had mentioned this in the ‘how to RBR’ post, but it is quite the annoyance for all us ‘z’ users when a link opens in the same window due to the fact that when you come back to the original post page, your read vs. unread spot is gone.
yes, i know i can hold down the ‘ctrl’ button when clicking on ANY link and it open in a new window but more often than not i have an adult beverage in my non-mouse hand so two handed clickage is a pain in the ass (not to mention completely dangerous to my keyboard – just ask the booth owner at the french market in nola what happened when i adorned my beer drinking hand with a bracelet and then turned my wrist to look at it – wasn’t pretty)
/stepsoffsoapbox
"You have to create 6 seconds of hell each play..."
Coach Nick Saban
i always do it
but i also post a lot more links than other people. the sb nation interface is extremely helpful in that it simplifies posting for folks who have very little technical savvy. but one result of that is you have a lot of folks on the learning curve with the niceties of the procedure. so have a little patience and keep offering constructive reminders to help us all along.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
The one on the backside of the play
Whoever that is. You know, when you ran screaming from the first one, and didn’t see the second one coming? Yeah, I don’t want to get hit by that guy.
by Steven Mitchell on Sep 1, 2011 12:34 PM CDT reply actions 1 recs
100% Dont'a is the most frightening force on this planet.
Inanity @gothlaw
"Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is." -Sir Francis Bacon
by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 1, 2011 1:04 PM CDT reply actions
I voted Hightower, but my all-time LB is probably Derrick Thomas. He hit many a fool in his day. We miss ya, big guy.
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
All time I've definitely gotta go with Rolando McClain.
But I’m a youngin.
Dave Robertson is growing up to be the new Mariano Rivera. My two universes of fandom can finally unite!
by SoGladILeftTheACC on Sep 1, 2011 2:04 PM CDT up reply actions
all time?
biscuit. no question.
Remember the Rose Bowl: The Story of the Alabama Crimson Tide & the Grandaddy of Them All
by kleph on Sep 1, 2011 2:21 PM CDT up reply actions 1 recs
Biscuit would scare the Christ out of me if I were an opposing QB.
But Derrick was faster than any nightmare-induced villain. If memory serves me correctly, NO ONE escaped his pursuit in 1988.
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
1988 PSU game may have been
the greatest individual defense effort I ever saw in person only rivaled by the 1963 Orange Bowl where Jordan had like 100 tackles. But, in the 63 Orange our offense played pretty good that day too. Vs. PSU In 88 it was just Derrick.
If Auburn was in New Mexico and we never played them I would still hate them and their dumb coach and their cheating players.
I would LOVE to have seen Leroy Jordan play.
Alas, I was born in ’77. Naturally, I had to buy the 1988 game where DT raked in 5(?) sacks against A&M. Thanks for reminding me about the ’88 PSU game, I cannot believe I forgot about that one.
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
I'd vote Bennett, too.
One of my all-time favorite hits, though, is still Jeremiah Castille against Illinois in Bryant’s last game. He punched the receiver’s clock, just outside the end zone, and caused a fumble. We watched that on VHS over and over.
WHY IS THIS NOT GREEN!!!!
Inanity @gothlaw
"Imagination was given to man to compensate him for what he is not; a sense of humor to console him for what he is." -Sir Francis Bacon
by Stuck in the Plains on Sep 2, 2011 5:43 PM CDT up reply actions
'Cause some of us liked DT better?
'There are two pains in life. There is the pain of discipline and the pain of disappointment. If you can handle the pain of discipline, then you'll never have to deal with the pain of disappointment,'- Nick Saban
Does it feel like Friday to anyone else?
"The first person I would like to thank is the good Lord, for giving me the ability to play the game of football. Because without the ability to play the game I would have been at Auburn." - Marty Lyons
its been friday all week...
www.DIY-Fitness.com My 100 lb Weightloss Journey.
Follow on twitter @thelyell
Hadn't noticed till today
"The first person I would like to thank is the good Lord, for giving me the ability to play the game of football. Because without the ability to play the game I would have been at Auburn." - Marty Lyons
by crimsonpride19 on Sep 1, 2011 3:21 PM CDT up reply actions
just check the
calendar..you do the math.
www.DIY-Fitness.com My 100 lb Weightloss Journey.
Follow on twitter @thelyell
to menny days.
'There are two pains in life. There is the pain of discipline and the pain of disappointment. If you can handle the pain of discipline, then you'll never have to deal with the pain of disappointment,'- Nick Saban
Dude, yes.
It felt like Friday yesterday, but today it feels even Fridayier
"Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that." - George Carlin
by Slice of Life on Sep 1, 2011 3:12 PM CDT up reply actions
I picked Upshaw and then went back to find out that Upshaw (6’2’’ 265) is SMALLER than Hightower (6’4’’ 260)…..thats just not right.
www.DIY-Fitness.com My 100 lb Weightloss Journey.
Follow on twitter @thelyell
how do you define "smaller"
Shorter and stouter is not smaller in my book (at least not when discussing who’s going to run into me full force)
"Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that." - George Carlin
by Slice of Life on Sep 1, 2011 4:34 PM CDT up reply actions
im 6'2''
235 and pretty solid….a dude 30 lbs heavier AND 2 inches taller is a big dude…
www.DIY-Fitness.com My 100 lb Weightloss Journey.
Follow on twitter @thelyell
...and a dude your height and 35 lbs heavier is also a big dude...
…even if he eats a lot of oatmeal….
"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban
by NiceLittleSaturday on Sep 1, 2011 6:22 PM CDT up reply actions
My tactic is to out-run all o y'all.
Chinese proverb once eloquently say…
“It is better to flee a larger opponent than to stand your ground and twisted into a friggin’ pretzel.”
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
I have a 110# great pyrenees named "Biscuit"
he was already named when we got him, but I’ve decided to retroactively name him after cornelius. I’d love to find a #97 jersey big enough for him.
Who was talking about hard hitters at media days last year...?
Saying Hightower? Upshaw? hit even harder than McClain? words to the effect that “it’s something no one should have to experience…”?
Gotta appreciate the brilliance of Spencer Hall....
5. The coaching leader in audible and lipreadable televised profanities for the fifth year in a row will be Nick Saban. Hint: his favorite word rhymes with “goddammit.”
I lol’d
For any Bammers with kids, you can thank Coach Saban for doing your in-game cursing for you.
" Don’t worry, you’ve been lumped." -- so sayeth Todd, 30th August in the Year of Our Lord 2011, 9:10PM
at the ATL-Ravens game last night
my youngest told me that Mike Johnson was on their jumbotron as he greated Cody with an obvious ‘hey you big ass mther-fcker’. haha! said cody is down to 320.
"You have to create 6 seconds of hell each play..."
Coach Nick Saban
Chris Jordan should be on that list.
Injury kept him out of most games last year but the hardest hits I saw were given out by #36.
by callmedeaconblues on Sep 2, 2011 2:48 PM CDT via mobile reply actions
His...
…is the first name I thought of before I saw the ‘starting’ designation. He’s bad….
"High standards come from passion within...." --Coach Nick Saban
by NiceLittleSaturday on Sep 2, 2011 11:52 PM CDT up reply actions
I chose Courtney
because all of em will knock your dick in the dirt. Only difference is when Courtney hits you, you will be digging for a week to get it out.
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