Your Friday Hoodoo Thread │Eating For Three

The sweetheart is deployed.

Our weekly attempt to curry favor with the Football Gods by admitting our moral, intellectual, and cultural shortcomings in a very public manner.

I'm sitting in the Atlanta airport waiting on to board my flight to Sakarlina, so I gotta make this short and sweet.

Previous Submissions

Recorded myself singing a Miley Cyrus song AND ate oatmeal ...

Ate a raw Habanero pepper...

Submitted an a poop filled embarrassing admission...

Promised to get a manicure for a win against Ole Miss..

Admitted I had problems on my honeymoon

Added pedicure to the already embarrassing manicure for UK.

Admitted to foolishly subjecting myself to physical and emotional pain to impress a lady friend.

Admitted to missing a TSIO to watch a light show at Stone Mountain Georgia and helped spread the word to finally #StopFallWeddings

Openly confessed to self tweezing my eye brows while watching football..

Mississippi State Admission

When I use to be a fatty (like 100+ lbs ago) I would stop and get McDonald's on the way home for me and the wife. Though eating McDonald's is embarrassing all by its lonesome, I took the deed to a whole new level.

I would buy three meals— One for my wife, one for me and one FOR THE DRIVE HOME. I would literally eat two separate value sized meals, yes I said value sized, with-in a thirty minute time frame and discard the evidence before entering the house. And she was none the wiser..

What's even better, is that when I would order the three meals, I would fake having a phone call on my cell, acting like I was getting multiple people's orders..

Sorry, not sorry.

Sweetheart Alternative- Shay Mitchell



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