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Mr Crimson: 2013 Week 2

What we know is nothing. We know nothing and won't really know much of anything until around week 4 or 5, and won't know anything borderline specific until week 7. I don't believe any poll counts for dookie before week 7, and I don't think any team that hasn't played at least 7 games is worthy of being called National Champion (I'm looking at you, 1869 1-1 Princeton).

That said, you can still show how silly polls are by actually posting a Top 25 in Week 2 based on team's strength of schedule (the average of your opponent's w-l average and your opponent's opponent's w-l average) and the margin of victory converted (a touchdown a la "7 pts on the scoreboard" = 10 pts).

1) Baylor (2-0)- Art Briles, 62.97. Baylor has beaten absolutely nobody (Wofford and Buffalo), but they've scored 139 pts and only given up 16. They're the most impressive looking of the Big 12 teams (so far). One wonders how good they'll look when they play an actual Big 12 team (not named Kansas).

2) Oregon (2-0)- Mark Helfrich, 61.87. Oregon hasn't beaten anyone either (Nicholls St and Virginia), but they've done it with the same aplomb as Baylor. At the moment, the two teams might as well be identical, but Oregon does this high scoring thing for a living, so they get the #2 ranking in the "real polls", while Baylor has to settle for... honestly, I have no idea if Baylor's even ranked.

3) Georgia Tech (1-0)- Paul Johnson, 60.41. They beat Elon 70-0. Let 'em have it. Lord only knows what'll happen when they face Duke.

4) UCLA (1-0)- Jim Mora, 55.26. They looked pretty good against Nevada, one of those teams it's impossible to tell how will look against anyone else they play from year to year (was that a complete sentence?).

5) Marshall (2-0)- Doc Holliday, 55.08. See, the funny things is, at the beginning of the season, the good teams play bad teams, so if you wanna be high up in the rankings, just pile a lot of points on the board. Since who you're playing is probably only playing teams that will beat them, they'll have a ridiculously high strength of schedule, which helps you out. Marshall played Miami of Ohio (outscored 52-14) and Gardner Webb (outscored 55-0). Are these teams good? Not even close. Does it matter? Not right now, it doesn't. There's no data!

6) Washington (1-0)- Steve Sarkisian, 51.69. Everybody was thinking the same thing when Washington german suplexed Boise St 38-6: "Oh good, we don't have to pretend we care about the smurfs anymore... thanks, Sarkisian!" ESPN, you realize it's been 7 years since Boise St beat Oklahoma? You can kindly give up on them now.

7) Louisville (2-0)- Charlie Strong, 51.65. Everyone who's high in the rankings right now are just waylaying crappy teams. It's possible a couple of these guys will bear out, but more than likely within the week and into conference play, they'll be replaced by better teams that can put up good numbers against worthy competition. Almost every single team in FBS has played a team in FCS already. The first two weeks of college football is basically like that state fair that puts an old car on the grounds and charges guys money to beat it with a sledgehammer. (In Kansas State's case, the old car still worked, and somebody slipped behind the wheel, started it up, and ran K-State over while they were talking to their friends about how close they were last season. "Who saw Baylor coming, amirite?" said Bill Snyder, as he didn't see North Dakota State coming). I leave Louisville completely out of this paragraph because lol Louisville.

8) UCF (2-0)- George O'Leary, 51.20. Central Florida, at the moment, is averaging 38 pts/gm. That's pretty cool. They did it against Akron and Florida International, but still, give them a round of applause. Pretty soon they won't be around anymore.

9) Maryland (2-0)- Randy Edsall, 49.99. Maryland has looked equally good, albeit against Florida International and Old Dominion. The pattern continues. What can you do?

10) Wisconsin (2-0)- Gary Anderson, 48.83. 93-0 against UMass and Tennessee Tech.

11) Arizona St (1-0)- Todd Graham, 47.60. 55-0 against Sacramento State.

12) Arizona (2-0)- Rich Rodriguez, 47.32. 93-13 against Northern Arizona and UNLV.

13) Alabama (1-0)- Nick Saban, 45.98. Yup, beating Virginia Tech 35-10 is enough to get us into the Top 25 and make us the highest ranked SEC team at #13. Will we climb up to #1 with a win against Texas A&M? Sure, at the end of the season when ours and A&M's wins start speaking for themselves.

14) Utah (2-0)- Kyle Whittingham, 45.80. 100-33 against Utah St and Weber St. Yeah, the majority of those pts were against Weber St.

15) FSU (1-0)- Jimbo Fisher, 45.00. 41-13 against Pittsburgh.

16) LSU (2-0)- Les Miles, 44.05. 93-44 against TCU and UAB.

17) Michigan (2-0)- Brady Hoke, 43.65. 101-39 against Central Michigan and Notre Dame.

18) Oklahoma St (2-0)- Mike Gundy, 43.61. 77-38 against MSU and UTSA.

19) Bowling Green (2-0)- Dave Clawson, 42.98. 75-29 against Tulsa and Kent St.

20) Troy (2-0)- Larry Blakeney, 42.42. 100-34 against UAB and Savannah St.

21) Texas Tech (2-0)- Kliff Kingsbury, 42.31. 102-36 against SMU and SF-Austin.

22) Penn St (2-0)- Bill O'Brien, 42.27. 68-24 against Syracuse and Eastern Michigan.

23) Tennessee (2-0)- Butch Jones, 42.09. 97-20 against Austin Peay and Western Kentucky

24) Ohio St (2-0)- Urban Meyer, 41.51. 82-27 against Buffalo and San Diego St

25) Nebraska (2-0)- Bo Pelini, 41.42. 93-47 against Wyoming and Southern Miss.

At the end of the year, the best teams will be on top. Right now, we're just talking out of our seat-cushions.

Roll tide.

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