FanPost

What the ……. IS Happening to This Place Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the RBR Shenanigans and the Banhammer…..

"Now we could do it with conventional weapons, but that could take years and cost millions of lives. No, I think we have to go all out. I think that this situation absolutely requires a really futile and stupid gesture be done on somebody's part!"

Was it the lurking just behind the shadows or was it the ESPN awe inspiring gridiron write-ups that have brought this fledgling pre-Dark Lord Blog to the forefront of the Mother Ship’s Banner? Many would justifiably argue that the hiring of Our Dark Lord has energized the population to heights not seen since pre-1981 but how does that correlate to the meteoric rise of the RBR Lords Dominion and the jubilant Commentarial Underling Masses? The prolific answer may very well be the recognition and wanton desire to be a part of the Blog by members of the outside sports world that funds the indentured servitude of our fine student-athletes thru the very members who support it by legal FCC Regulations.

"I have to tell you, I have some real problems with this whole thing despite how much we need it. I'm concerned that too much power will end up in the hands of too few. It's always in somebody's best interest to promote enemies real or imagined. I see this as America's eyes and ears; I don't want it to become its heart and soul. So I told the president for this to work there is going to have to be some kind of civilian oversight."

"Oh, he's very popular Ed. The sportos, the motorheads, geeks, sluts, bloods, wastoids, dweebies, dickheads - they all adore him. They think he's a righteous dude."

You, the fine reader must wonder and I ask to wonder out loud (LOUD I SAY… LOUDER DAMN YOU) the magnitude of emotion that must come from one to profess such a fandom for ODL and these fine Warriors as to admit to urinating on shirts, sitting on glass tables, eating oatmeal, stealing into the night into enemy territory to paint rocks, twittering countless hours, assault with a deadly weapon, or marrying the enemy just to honor the Lords of Bama Hoo Doo.

"The mental facility to detect conspiracies and betrayal are the same qualities most likely to corrode natural judgment. Everything that seems clear is bent. And everything that seems bent is clear. Trapped in reflections, you must learn to recognize when a lie masquerades as the truth and then deal with it efficiently, dispassionately."

"You want answers? I think I’m entitled to. You want answers!?!? I want the truth!! You can’t handle the truth!!"

Going forward how does the Champagne of Blogs fulfill the needs of all FANS? Several Lords have graciously given of their time, energy, and money to highlight the "other" BAMA sports and to bring to the forefront the young men and women student-athletes who bring the highest accolades and just rewards to the University. The young men and women who strive daily for excellence in the classroom and on the field of battle with no taxable income or expense accounts, who only have our cheers and words of encouragement to fulfill their wants and needs for success in their endeavor to persevere. Several of the members of the Commentarial Underling Masses give of their free time and work time (of course – I mean why work when you can post on RBR – "Looks like you've been missing a lot of work lately. I wouldn't say I've been missing it, Bob") to give thoughtful, insightful responses to the writings of the Lords and in turn to the Warriors of the Realm. These responses which elicit such deep feelings from within each and every one of us – the collective US - must be heard. But these voices clamoring for the podium of the internet must also realize the inherent responsibilities this immense chasm affords each and every one of us. It is our duty, our responsibility, to skate the thin ice between freedom of expression and moral responsibility without subjecting those that follow to the minute cracks in the ice that our ramblings have left behind. Which of you would want to be the one who dodged the hammer only to it to crack the ice and forever trap fellow brethren beneath the frozen waste?

"Have you ever had a single moment’s thought about my responsibilities? Have you ever thought, for a single solitary moment about my responsibilities to my employers? Does it matter to you at all that the owners have placed their complete confidence and trust in me, and that I have signed a letter of agreement, a contract, in which I have accepted that responsibility? Do you have the slightest idea, what a moral and ethical principle is, do you? Has it ever occurred to you what would happen to my future, if I were to fail to live up to my responsibilities? Has it ever occurred to you? HAS IT?"

As I have stated previously on this internet site that several key words must and I repeat MUST not be spoken, written, uttered, or whatever because of the Nineteen Eighty Four effect, you know,

"The National Security Agency. Ah. You're the guys I hear breathing on the other end of my phone. No, that's the FBI. We're not chartered for domestic surveillance. Oh, I see. You just overthrow governments. Set up friendly dictators. No, that's the CIA. We protect our government's communications, we try to break the other fella's codes. We're the good guys, Marty. Gee, I can't tell you what a relief that is... Dick"

So I will repeat the list and remember it is an ongoing list that can be updated daily: anything concerning tinfoil, tools, weapons, raycism, bewbs, under-bewbs, side-bewbs, couches, cacti, drugs, sex, politics, Christmas trees, squirrels, militant squirrels, religion, numbers, bullets (the kind that looks like a floating dot and no not LSD, dang stay on track here will you?), curse words, vulgar innuendo, rock and roll, music that make cats scream, helicopters, blue pills, imaginary numbers, height tags, pay-for-play, Drexel, Northwestern, Unions, and random movie quotes.

"Hold on. You have to slow down. You're losing it. You have to take a breath. Listen to yourself. You're connecting a computer bug I had with a computer bug you might have had and some religious hogwash. You want to find the number 216 in the world, you will be able to find it everywhere. 216 steps from a mere street corner to your front door. 216 seconds you spend riding on the elevator. When your mind becomes obsessed with anything, you will filter everything else out and find that thing everywhere."

Also all the so-called glitches that have been occurring on this site and have been for quite some time are not due to your ineptness or any single act of tomfoolery or haberdashery. I previously tried to attribute it to General User Error, but it seems as if it is really coming from either the heartbleed virus, the use of federal lands for profit, electric cars, solar panels, or the death-rays from the distant planet of Erkzoid.

"Well, I don't really think that the end can be assessed as of itself as being the end because what does the end feel like? It's like saying when you try to extrapolate the end of the universe, you say, if the universe is indeed infinite, then how - what does that mean? How far is all the way, and then if it stops, what's stopping it, and what's behind what's stopping it? So, what's the end, you know, is my question to you."

SPOILER ALERT - THIS IS A PARODY POST



FanPosts are just that; posts created by the fans. They are in no way indicative of the opinions of SBN and the authors of Roll Bama Roll.

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