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Obama Looks to Use Anti Monopoly Laws to Break Alabama's RBs (Satire)

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Barack Obama has always been an advocate of spreading the wealth. Now he's looking into a myriad of laws, such as anti-trust laws, monopoly laws, and even RICO statutes to break up Alabama's running backs, which seem to have a monopoly over the other teams in college football. "It's bad enough to bring back the two that dominated from last year, but bringing in another, (in the person of Eddie Lacey) may just be too much," said Obama this week while discussing NCAA matters and possible playoff scenarios. "Having three game-breaking backs is just too much for one team, especially when there are teams like Northwest Texas State that have none," he said. "Perhaps we should look into sending Richardson to North Texas State and send Eddie Lacey to someplace like Hawaii." "People like Nick Saban and institutions like Alabama are just not good for college football; they want it all to be about themselves and not about college football as a whole," Obama continued. "And there's word from our investigators that Jeramie Griffin, Demetrius Goode, Ivan Matchett, and Jermaine Preyear are also top quality running back and they too are enrolled at Alabama."

Ladies and Gentlemen, your Friday Morning FAIL...

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Funny-random-hilarious-3w-4

Ladies and Gentlemen, your Friday Morning FAIL...

A McEachern High School football standout was killed early Thursday in an apparent murder-suicide...

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A McEachern High School football standout was killed early Thursday in an apparent murder-suicide at his family's Powder Springs home. Police identified the deceased as Rajaan Bennett, who earlier this month signed to play football in the fall at Vanderbilt University, and Clifton O'Neal Steger, a former boyfriend of Bennett's mother and the suspected shooter, police say. A third person was wounded in the shooting.

Atlanta Journal-Constitution: McEachern High School football star's murder stuns community Tragic news this afternoon about Vanderbilt signee Rajaan Bennett. Making matters worse, Bennett did seem to be a pretty dang talented kid. Rivals had him as a four-star, and he was considered by many to be Vandy's best signee. This whole deal is just eerily similar to the death of Kwame Doster.

Andy Staples Proposes Four 16-Team Super Conferences

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Staples proposes the top 64 money making athletic departments breaking away from the NCAA. Interesting idea overall, though 16 teams is way too many per conference and since all I care about is football, I'd hate to see the likes of Vanderbilt, Illinois and Duke get the nod over teams like Utah, Boise State and BYU. Heck, I'd hate to see the likes of Troy and Hawai'i dropped in favor of Indiana and Washington State.

Vanderbilt signee tragically is killed

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I saw this story this morning and it really broke my heart. It sounds like this was a nice, talented young man that could have made difference in this world. It is such a shame.

Arkansas quarterback Ryan Mallett suffered a broken left foot during conditioning drills Wednesday...

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Arkansas quarterback Ryan Mallett suffered a broken left foot during conditioning drills Wednesday and will miss all of spring practice. Mallett's recovery is expected to last three to four months, according to Arkansas' medical staff, which would bring him back in plenty of time for the start of preseason practice in August.

ESPN.com: Mallett breaks foot; out 3-4 months For a guy who already had the mobility of a city bus, this cannot be good news for him. I'm sure he'll be healthy by the time the season rolls around, but even so he needed a fair amount of work, and missing all of spring ball plus being limited during portions of summer workouts won't help.

Asked about Alabama players aside from Cody, Kiper said he sees linebacker Rolando McClain going to...

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Asked about Alabama players aside from Cody, Kiper said he sees linebacker Rolando McClain going to the Dolphins with the 12th pick of the first round, and considers offensive guard Mike Johnson as an underrated prospect would could possibly move into the late second round. "He's the underrated one, the way he hustles downfield," Kiper said. "He can pull, he has athleticism. He could get stronger, but he's a good knee-bender."

Mike Herndon: Cody could still be a first-rounder; Tebow should have skipped Senior Bowl

Another Oregon Starter Arrested

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Oregon starting RB LaMichael James has been booked and is currently at the Lane County Jail having been charged with strangulation, assault and menacing. The Oregon football team is having a really bad time off the field.

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