We have it on good authority from our well placed sources in Tuscaloosa that AD Moore has serveral candidates at the top of his list. We firmly believe that negotiations with Tulsa head coach Steve Kragthorpe are under way, and that there is still an outside possibility that Steve Spurrier is a viable candidate.
Below is a transcript of our discussion with a source close to the university that wishes to remain anonymous:
Roll Bama Roll: Thank you for sharing this information with us. Can you tell us how it came into your possession?
Unnamed Source: Well, I was here at the [REDACTED], when I saw a grey hairded fella pull in. He looked right sharp and was driving one of them fancy new cars with all the bells and whistles. I don't much care for such things, my old Buick gets me around just fine, but it seemed like a fine automobile and I was real surprised when he put in the cheap stuff. I know gas being what it is and all lots of folks use it, but I reckoned a fella that could buy such a fine automobile could also buy the good gas. But that's none of my business so I didn't say nothing to him.
RBR: Is it safe to assume that this "gray hairded fella" was Alabama AD Mal Moore?
US: Oh, I don't know, I didn't know him from Adam. I've seen this Mal Moore fella on the TV from time to time, but ever since they run off that nice Stallings boy I ain't been too keen on keeping up with all the goings on over at the university. Martha, she reads the papers and keeps up with it, but I just try to watch the games on Saturday and not get too worked up over it. Dr. Barton told me I needed to watch my diet and keep away from too much stress since that last string of dizzy spells, so I keep away from those things.
RBR: From your best guess, though, would you say it was AD Moore?
US: My memory ain't what it used to be, but it seems to me there was an Alabama tag on the car. I suppose it could have been.
RBR: What was AD Moore doing while he pumped his gas?
US: At first it looked like he was talking to himself, kinda crazy like, but then I seen one of those little plastic things sticking out of his ear, like a hearing aid, and I thought he might have been talking into it.
RBR: Was it a bluetooth headset?
US: No sir, his teeth were pearly white, whatever else you can say about the fella you can say he sure took care of his choppers, that's for sure. I've been sporting store boughts for years now, so I've learned to appreciate a man that takes good care of his own God givens.
RBR: What was he talking about?
US: I tend to mind my own when folks is talking around me, but since it was a slow day at the [REDACTED] it was hard to not catch some of his conversation. Seemed he was going on and on about what "Steve" wanted and making sure he got it right this time, something about a "fiasco" last time and he didn't want to go through that again.
RBR: Did he happen to mention "Steve's" last name?
US: No sir, he just kept on about him coming to visit and bringing the family and trying to find the right presents for the kids.
RBR: So is it reasonable to assume that AD Moore is in serious negotiations with a coaching candidate named Steve, possibly Kragthorpe or even Spurrier?
US: Oh, I don't really know such things.
RBR: Well thank you very much for your time.
US: Any time, young man. That'll be $35.12 for the fill up.
Ol' Jim down to the filling station wishes to remain anonymous.