You know the routine...
1. Ohio State: I know you probably hate Ohio State and the Big Ten in general, but if you can't see this is a very good football team, you're just being naive.
2. Boston College: Said it for weeks, they'll choke. They were out-choked by arguably the King of the Choke-Job on Thursday night, but they'll choke somewhere along the line. This is the least crappy team in a crappy conference.
3. Arizona State: Another impressive performance from the Sun Devils. If they can beat the Quack Attack this Saturday, this team suddenly has a great chance of being Bourbon Street-bound. And you have to know that ol' Dennis wants to erase the painful memories of the last time he was in town for the Sugar Bowl.
4. LSU: Their off-week wasn't too quite, unfortunately, with Perrilloux and Odom getting in a big fight at a campus area bar. As if this week didn't need any more background noise...
5. Oregon: Dennis Dixon will win the Heisman at this pace, and they looked great against USC. If LSU slips up, look out, these guys are very, very good. They have played consistently the best football of any one-loss team all year long, and they have some big-time quality wins (USC, Michigan, etc.). The truth of the matter is that if it weren't for a fluke finish against Cal, these guys would be undefeated and getting a lot of first place votes.
6. Oklahoma: An off week to prepare for Man Boobs. Hopefully it will be 77-0: Part Two this Saturday.
7. Kansas: Ah, yes they're undefeated, but they didn't exactly look all of that great against a pretty crappy Texas A&M team. I figure they lose a game or two on down the stretch. Still, you have to give the Jayhawks some credit, they have done very well.
8. Missouri: These guys didn't look too good against Iowa State, but the Cyclones have been scrappy the past two weeks, so perhaps they are improving. At this point, it's all about a showdown with Kansas in the regular season finale. Chase Daniel and company should roll through Colorado, aTm, and K-State with no major trouble.
9. West Virginia: After annihilating Rutgers on the road, suddenly these guys are the clear-cut favorite to get into a BCS game. I know the Big East blows and all, but if so that will put the Mountaineers in two BCS games in three years, and that's impressive stuff. Fear the Sombrero.
10. Michigan: I never thought these guys would be here, but whatever. I figure the Wolverines lose at home to Ohio State, but it's hard to rank them any lower. You cannot ignore the fact that they have won seven straight, and that they are one win away -- at home -- from going to a BCS bowl.
11. Georgia: They're up, then down. Up. Down. Up. Down. Make up your mind people! Either be good or suck, I don't care either way. Just pick one and stick with it. And I'm sorry, if there was a Classless Team of the Year Award, it would go hands-down to Georgia in 2007. After taunting the 'Bama student section, stomping on the Vandy logo, and that Miami-esque celebration penalty, that's plain ridiculous. Look, if you need to get the benches cleared with celebrations just to get motivated -- in a rivalry game with major SEC East implications, at that -- you've got major problems.
12. UConn: They're 7-1, and if they can beat West Virginia they may be BCS-bound. So, uh, whatever.
13. Auburn: It was a close victory over the 2007 Moral Victory Champions, but a win is a win. This is a pretty good football team, but they'll drop at least one of the games against Georgia and Alabama. I don't care if this is the best team in the country, karma will dictate that they lose at least one more game after that chickensh*t block on Glenn Dorsey last weekend. And you can just go ahead and mark it on your calendar: some Bayou Bengal will exact revenge for that crap come next year, and it will be deserved revenge at that. Gig 'em.
14. Florida: The Gators were flat-out beaten by UGA, but they are still alive in the East. They'll likely beat South Carolina, and with the tiebreaker over Tennessee, they just need the Vols and UGA to lose again and they may end up back in Atlanta. Considering it's likely that UT and UGA lose at least one more conference game, and that Florida will likely have a better divisional record, they are in pretty good shape on the tiebreakers. If Tebow stays hurt though, they could crash and burn.
15. Texas: Jamaal Charles ran for 200+ yards in the fourth, and I'm honestly not sure anyone got a finger on him on his three long touchdown runs. The 'Horns should have annihilated the Huskers, but they didn't, and they are obviously not that good. But the schedule is pretty easy from here on out, and they'll probably go at least 9-3 or so.
16. Alabama: 'Bama had about the best off-week you could, no one was injured and no one was arrested. And apparently we're about as healthy as you can reasonably expect at this point, so that's all good news. Our match-up with Idle U went pretty well.
17. Virginia Tech: These guys suck, and that was one of the best choke-jobs I've seen in ages. You've got to give them credit though, these guys can choke with the best of them, always have. That said, in the crap-tacular ACC, the odds are that they win their division and make the ACC Championship Game. They aren't very good, but in the ACC you don't have to be.
18. USC: Something is amiss with these guys. No one has underachieved anywhere near like these guys have, and now they may very well end up in the Holiday Bowl. That's a helluva long way from where, in terms of talent and depth, where they should have been at season's end. I'm telling you, something is not right in La-la land.
19. Boise State: Ah, why not? They had an impressive win over Fresno State, and I imagine a worst-case scenario has them losing to Hawai'i and ending up 10-2 and in a bowl game.
20. Tennessee: After the game against South Carolina, the Vols may qualify as the luckiest team in the country. And the win did likely end the chances of an outright collapse down the stretch, but it's still hard to see these guys doing better than 8-4, and they very well may still struggle to get there. The truth of the matter is that ol' Rocky Top has been nothing special since at least 2001, and as long as the Fat One remains they won't be anything special. The Volunteer fans who expect Fulmer to lead them again to the Promised Land, despite much evidence to the contrary, are about on the same level as the 'Bama people who expected Shula to bring a BCS trophy back to Tuscaloosa.
21. Arkansas: Keep in mind this is coming from the author of "Hogwash": The Hogs have the best player in the country, the best rushing attack in the country, and one of the best defenses in the SEC. They led Alabama with 15 seconds left, led Auburn with less than a minute, and led the majority of time against Kentucky. They've got games upcoming against South Carolina, Tennessee, and LSU. You can rest assured they will win at least one of those games, and possibly two. This isn't that bad of a football team, and all of the aforementioned will get them a big win or two.
22. Hawai'i: Undefeated, so whatever. This bunch isn't all that good, but considering Boise isn't as good as a year ago, and that Washington is probably the worst team in the Pac-10, they may just go undefeated. It's not like they have to beat any real quality teams. And they get both of those teams at home, which is probably a real advantage for the Warriors just because of the forever-long flight, the disruptions in practice schedules, and the distractions that are all inherent with a trip to Hawai'i.
23. Virginia: Yep, they choked against a crappy NC State team. But again, as crappy as the ACC is, they could very well find themselves in the ACC Championship Game with a win over a so-so Virginia Tech team.
24. Kentucky: I'll keep the Wildcats ranked for the hell of it, though they really don't deserve it. I've said it for weeks, these guys aren't that good. Their big win over LSU was about the Bayou Bengals struggling, not about Kentucky being that good.
25. Vanderbilt: After a win over Miami (Ohio), I give these guys my Mr. Irrelevant pick for the second week in a row. A bowl game likely looms.