Yet another epic week in the world of meltdown time. With Upset Saturday in full swing, you knew that we were going to have some fun this Tuesday morning. Let's just say there was no disappointment.
There was nothing this week quite of LSU proportions, but lots of good material nevertheless. South Carolina followed up their biggest win ever by choking against a basketball school, Arkansas goes nuts on the defense and the officials, Texas once again choked to Nebraska, Florida is going back to the late 1980's, and Ohio State pulled their typical choke job against a fellow Big Ten program.
The topic list this week includes its usual variety of randomness, such as Les Miles, Bobby Knight, chair throwing, boycotts, Slappies, the Choke at Doak, Tasers, Halloweeen, Arena League football, paraplegics, Wal-Mart, Tyson Chicken, Jesus, Bill Callahan, apple sauce, KY Jelly, Bear Bryant, Chinese Water torture, partial birth abortion, Beef 'O Brady's, Ron Zook, Shreveport, New Coke, Obama, the Rolling Stones, hangings, rapes, 747s, suicide, anthrax, and the Cleveland Cavaliers.
As always, the language gets very, very bad. You've been warned. Enjoy after the jump:
We're back!!
34 years and I've never been this disgusted.
Same old stuff. We will NEVER be contenders.
I have never been so embarrassed to be a Gamecock fan.
Admit it, all we did was beat an overrated Alabama team at home that's probably on their way to a 9-3 season. We didn't beat a #1 team, we just beat a team with the media's lips around their wang
Worst loss I can recall in 26 years as a gamecock....
If Spurrier gave himself a game ball last week, I hope he gives himself a big steaming pile of shit this week
What's there to cry and moan about? If you're not used to this then.you were born this morning.
Oh no, no, no, I thought the light finally came on for Garcia? It didn't have shit to do with him having all day to throw to wide open receivers against an overrated defense, did it?
One last heave to the end zone and we throw it to some slapdick while Alshon goes jogging?
And we're back to reality.
This is why we are who we are.
Vacation over, folks, but it was a fun seven days and six nights, right?
Worst rushing defense in the SEC and we run the ball five times in the second half? Thanks SOS
Spurrier must have gone to the Les Miles school of coaching last week
I was wondering if someone in our secondary had money on the game from what I saw.
I exerted more pressure on my bladder going to the bathroom than the entire defense exerted on UK's offense tonight.
Worst coached end of game ever for SOS!
Our pass rush was much better when we had a quarterback who held onto the ball for 10 minutes
For most of this game our staff made Les Miles, the man that uses "want" as both a noun and a verb in the SAME sentence, look like a genius.
This is just as shitty as the Choke at Doke just without a cool nickname. Clusterfuck in Lexington just doesn't have that ring to it.
Most embarrasing loss in our SEC history
I'd rather taken my chances with Les Miles in that situation. At least if we would have shit the bed with him we'd done it with a fake field goal instead of a shit throw to the 14th string nobody.
Les Miles will think that was bad coaching when he hears it
How the fuck did Les Miles get on our sideline?
Calm down, still two plays to go, we got this FUUUUUUUUUUUCKKKKKKKKKKKK
Fuck you Carolina, all you ever do is give me false hope
I never believed the "New Carolina" shit. It took SOS almost five years to get a big-time win, that told you all you needed to know there
CBS = Cam Bitch-Slapped Us
We just won Cam Newton the Heisman. Don't want to hear any more shit about how Arkansas has never produced a Heisman winner.
We couldn't have stopped him if Petrino would have given our defense tasers
I'm starting a fire Penn Wagers petition
Penn Wadgers for Heisman
Never has there been a figure that has affected more college football games than Penn Wadgers. Not Bo Jackson, Not Tim Tebow, not Tony Dorsett.
Until LSU, Ark, MSU, and OM demand that the SEC office clean up officiating, expect that when playing in the state of Alabama you get hosed! There too many SEC officials from the state of Alabama!
What happens when Alabama plays Auburn? Do they flip a coin to see who gets the breaks?
I, for one, will never chant SEC again... I'm ashamed to... We all should be...
We need 2 withdrawl from this conference immediately!
send a message, they have disabled their telephone. what is the email?
Those fucking pussies at the SEC office aren't accepting phone calls
Suggestion for Willie next week: practice tackling
We're the fucking champions of Arena league football
Only good thing from today is that we showed that Mallett is replaceable. Any QB with pubes can post big numbers in our offense. Problem is half the sororities on campus could put up 28+ against our defense
Our defense got lit up like the White House Christmas tree. It's time for Willie Robinson to join the ranks of the unemployed.
Here's a Halloween idea, our defense could pretend to be football players
65 points? My fucking 9 year old kid doesn't even give up 65 on Heisman mode
We just need to leave the SEC, and that has nothing to do with officiating. We've been in this conference for almost 20 years and through that time we have proven time and again we cannot win here. Go to the Big 12, CUSA, whatever, but we need to leave
He's right. This was our year to win it all and we're going to probably finish 9-3 at best and fourth in the SECW. Failure.
Check list for joining the WAC... high scoring finesse offense, check. High scoring allowing defense, check. Goofy uniforms, check. Guess that covers it, let's roll.
Penn Wagers and his crew are now 2-0 vs Arkansas. This is worse than old SWC officiating. We got fucked and didn’t even get kissed
Where are some chairs that we can throw on the field? I don’t like Bobby knight but this is unbelievable.
I commend every one of you who is able to speak about this game without breaking a vacuum in the front lawn amid a frenzy of foul words because i sure as hell can’t
65 points? 65 points? I bet there are some guys on our team who cannot even count to 65
65 points could have been worse. They would have scored 650 had they had enough time
The only way we were stopping Auburn is that if they sent in the paraplegic team
We couldn't have stopped the paraplegics. We would have needed the second coming of Jesus.
A competent defense... can't find that at Wal Mart, and apparently you can't buy it with Tyson Chicken money either
All I want for Christmas is Turner Gill
As much as I hate it...Texas absolutely owns us. If you can't beat 'em, switch conferences.
This team performed today as if it were still coached by Bill Callahan
COMPLETELY out-coached!
We are their bitch, glad we're getting the fuck out of here
We would choke on apple sauce, if served by Texas. Disgusting.
The brutal part is that we leave the conference with Texas pretty much legitimately saying we were not in there league anyway.
Our receivers couldn't catch HIV from a cheap hooker
Somebody replaced the stickem with K-Y Jelly.
This game was chinese water torture. Drop drop drop drop drop
I could live to see 218 and nobody will ever offer a valid explanation for that onside kick
You couldn't fucking pay me to go read Shaggy Bevo right now
Dammit….I are pyssed. And drunk. Mother f’n Texas. I hate those asshats.
fucking crappiest craptastic ever fuck you bastards, shit asss.
My grandfather gave me some advice on fights: if you see you cannot win them, run like a motherfucker. That's basically what happened with us, Texas, and the Big Ten move.
And people wonder why we cannot get a big time RB....joke
Gee, why didn't Trent Richardson sign with us? Definitely those Bammer boosters right?
I bet we have many transfers this offseason
The football team is turning into the hoops team after Billy's flip-flop.
Our OL was yet another partial birth abortion.
Every time I see Cam Newton killing people wearing orange and blue I want to puke
A Gator QB is going to win the Heisman. Oh, wait...
Looks like our staff is pulling the mad hatter clock management trick.
Did anyone else see Meyer almost collapse at the end? Looked like a lost child in a crowd at Disney
if we handed out loaded guns to all the spectators im sure some of the bullets would help the team
I think our coaching staff should start getting drunk before games.
Full-time Urban = Bear Bryant. Part-time Urban = Ron Zook
The last time we lost three straight I was still in my daddys nutsack
You guys are right, we really should stop booing. Definitely time to start throwing shit
The ghost of Ron Zook has returned
Urban Meyer has officially sent us back to the 1980's
Does the SEC still have a Shreveport tie-in? Relevant question at this point
I hear Shreveport is lovely in December.
My prediction is the Beef O' Brady's bowl against UCF
Fuck this, if I were into this sort of pain I'd just be a Magic fan
We're at Defcom 1 folks, I doubt we can even beat Georgia
Bowl game? Bowl game? We're 4-3 and we have games left against Georgia, South Carolina, and FSU. Can a 6-6 team even make a bowl game?
Appalachan State will beat us
Urban 2.0 is like the new Coke
This Addazzio shit is stupid, the real question is can we win with a part-time coach?
I seriously think Urban's therapy for his health is to smoke a hell of a lot of marijuana. How else can you explain what is going on.
Urban's return is about like the Rolling Stones return circa 1985
I think they have gone to the Obama school of bullshit. We are on the "right course". "We are on track". I'm guessing Brantley will rate out as a "Champion" this week too.
I bet we don't sign a single recruit who attended this game
7 points against MSU? 7 points? This time a year ago I would have bet our recruiting class could have scored more than that against this bunch even as high school seniors
10+ 5-star recruits and 7 points against MSU. Shit don't add up folks And you dumb dicks pay to read that recruiting shit?
You want your "insider" recruiting news? We're going to sign a bunch of overrated, overhyped pussies who aren't going to do shit but get arrested when they get on campus
All of this recruiting speed garbage is a problem. We play football, not run track. The two are not the same.
It's like waiting all morning for Christmas and when you wake up its just a big bag of dicks
It's time for the Pryor era to end.
We should hang the special teams coach immediately
Exposed again, as always. Why bother?
Consider me happy, I'd rather lose now than sit through another raping by an SEC school
It's a dead program nationally. We're just consistently the tallest midget in our own conference, nothing more
Wonder if Purdue will annihilate us again?
Im debating on cutting my wrist with a butter knife or just lop it off with a hatchet.
You could have landed a 747 in some of the holes Whisky's offensive line created. I couldn't have gotten my dick in some of the ones we made
Did someone tell our defensive line that their OL had anthrax or something?
Denard Robinson will make a highlight reel out of this shitty defense
Deal with it, Ohio State is a finesse program now.
I bet Woody is rolling in his grave with these pussies scared shitless they may actually have to touch someone
THIS TEAM SUCKS!!!! I HATE HEACOCK, TRESSEL AND OUR ENTIRE PUSSY DEFENSE. OUR DEFENSIVE LINE HAS NO SPEED OR TALENT
Defense is like fucking swiss cheese
Better to get exposed now than in the NC game
Maybe kickoff was just past Tressel's bed time?
This is who we are, beating Michigan and hoping to get to the Rose Bowl. Anything above that is out of our league
5 star players with 1 star coaching equals what you saw tonight.
No analysis needed, we pissed down our leg tonight
3 stars making 5 stars look like bitches
You really thought we were NC bound? Based on what? Our QB that cannot throw? Our defense that plays like pussies? Our close win over a shitty, overrated ACC team at home? Get fucking real. Cavs winning the NBA Finals this year too?