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NSFW: It's Meltdown Time! Week Ten XXL Edition

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Another edition of our shameless revelry in the misery of others.

John David Mercer-USA TODAY Sports

Welcome to the Week Ten XXL edition of Meltdown Time, everyone. November typically produces some explosive meltdowns as fans of teams in contention have had the opportunity to get themselves all worked up and believing that they might just get to experience the euphoria that a championship would bring. When reality strikes, it strikes hard.

Leading off we have the LSU fans who had somehow convinced themselves that the best defensive line college football has seen in some time would wilt at the very sight of the great Leonard Fournette. I think this fellow sums up their feelings quite well:

LSU Fan leaving The State of Tuscaloosa Alabama After that BEAT DOWN laugh out loud

Posted by Arthur Davis Show on Sunday, November 8, 2015

Ah, that's some sweet music.

Following LSU we have the Aggies who simply had to be included since I inexplicably overlooked them after their beat down against Ole Miss. Their expectations were certainly lowered after that one, but not to the point of accepting defeat to a bad Auburn team. Next up are the Michigan State fans who blame their defeat on the officials for failing to call a penalty for the receiver going out of bounds before the catch, but perhaps their guy could have made a play on the ball? Even better, how about not being within one score of a three-win team to begin with?

Next up are TCU fans who produced a decent meltdown, albeit in limited quantities. Last but not least, the Ole Miss faithful who likely saw their SEC Championship dreams go up in flames on just about the most improbable 4th and 25 play you will ever see. Karma's a bitch, Rebs.

As always, the language in this post is horrific. If you are offended by such things, read no further. You have been warned. Otherwise, enjoy and tell us who won.

LSU

Deer Antler Spray
Bama's linemen were on it or some other performance enhancer - period. There's no other explanation for our O-line stacked with future NFL players to get blown off the ball all night that way in a game they were hyped to play in as well.
Why didn't Bama's line do the same to Tennessee's or Ole Miss's? They used it 1/9/12 and they used it 11/7/15.
I'm not one to start rumors or controversies but it's the only way it could have happened

Les is Saban's beotch...we will never beat Bama until Saban retires

Bruh.. I'm getting some angry p***y tonight.... Holes in the wall are gonna need fixing

A solid beating makes me feel better than some game decided by a bullshit penalty.

I really hate seeing happy Bama people on TV.

What makes it miserable to watch isn't losing so much as it is the announcers jizzing on every Alabama play of 15 yds or more.... The few LSU had they were "incomplete...oh, did he catch it?"..... Those homers can suck it

frustrating how they decide to call holding with the game out of reach and not when it actually fucking matters

Lane Kiffen has kicked Cameron's ass today. P.S. Die gumps.

you're fucking hilarious if you actually get emotionally attached to college football. fucking creepy if college aged males are your thing bruh. i'm way more concerned with finding nice pairs of tits for example.
LSU wins? fuck yeah it was fun.
LSU loses? fuck yeah it was fun.
i'm not on the fucking field

Any FUCKING bama fan that comes here after this shit is getting my fucking foot up there ass. Fuck those guys.

well at least it's a blowout
no last second heartbreaker. We are a long , long way from overtaking Bama. Nothing fans say or do will ever affect an outcome of a football game. We will have to be content with hopefully a ten win season. SEC or National titles aren't in our future any time soon.
Vern, that short fat fucking pussy, couldn't even bring himself to acknowledge Leornard's TD.
God they suck!

Shitty ass Ole Miss can beat Bama, but our super WR recruits get shut down. Our big time OL recruits get manhandled. Our savior QB recruit has a crap game. Somebody please show me the positives. We don't belong in the playoff, just like Bama didn't deserve the 4th spot. Well, we don't deserve the 4th spot either. We aren't the best team in the conference. We're stuck hoping another team takes care of business for us again. Because 5 times in a row, we haven't been able to do it ourselves. Root for State to take care of our failure.

I have been a Miles supporter. but I'm beginning to tilt the other way, especially when this type of game is standard fare. Of course, I'd much rather Nick Saban retire. College football might actually be fun again.

Fire the Strength and Condition team The WHOLE team. They are obviously not getting it done against the only fucking team that matters.

Let's all have a moment of silence for the iron bowl this year and how Auburn will get fucked in the ass.

Verne and Gary are fucking homicidal rage inducing when your team is shooting itself in the face.

You know, Gary, lots of teams rotate linemen in to keep them fresh, it's not an Alabama invention. Maybe you've heard of the Chinese Bandits?

Leonard "One yard" Fournette everybody.

"how do you like your defense?"
"just fuck my shit up fam"

This is Fucking pathetic. Year after year is the same Fucking thing

Yeah, I'm just going to kill myself

Well we crossed the 50, so suck on that Bama.

Bama holds every play...

Season is fucking over. Fuck you, Alabama. Fuck you Saban. Fuck you, LSU O-Line. Fuck you, referees. Fuck you, SEC. Fuck you again, Saban, you worthless piece of shit. I'm fucking done. I fucking hate this shit. Every fucking year. EVERY. MOTHER. FUCKING. YEAR. I JUST FUCKING CAN'T. I. AM. SO. FUCKING. DONE. Even when you beat them, they just get a free pass to the championship anyway. I'm done with this shit.

At least our women look better.

fucking fat fuck fuckhead Morpheus!

When are Verne and Gary going to die or retire? I'm ok with either one really. It just needs to happen already.

I imagine the ATT girl farting in the bed next to me. Her cheeks turn rosy from being embarrassed. I say, "that's okay, love." Then I turn her over and bone her.

I want to fucking hang myself

fuck bama fuck saban fuck their offense fuck their d line fuck cock fuck fuckin fuck lsu fuck cfp commitee fuck les miles fuck our offense fuck the defense fuck my hopes fuck my dreams fuck your cousin bama fucks fuck life fuck football. I dont know why i even try.

AGGIES

Fuck we are terrible

Can't help but laugh at this shit.

I'm here, my sword ready for seppuku, only honorable way out.

Sumlin is such a fucking fraud. Go back to Houston bitch.
Sorry but had to get that out before the vodka completely took over. What a dumb fuck he is.
One of you current students needs to go on a hunger strike
No food until Jake Spavital is revoked of his coaching duties. We will not stand for this injustice any longer

I told y'all two weeks ago we'd still the same shitty offense and that we would look improved and win just because it was SC. 3 points against auburn this half. 3. Let that sink in.

Offense is decrepit across the board against a shit defense.

I wanna burn it down.

Hellen Keller saw this coming. Even a deaf dummy knows Spav is out. Not sure why a "reliable source" is needed after the third crap fest in the last four games.

MIZZOU BLACK PLAYERS BOYCOTTING
Until their president resigns. Too bad we don't play them this year. Although we'd probably still lose to 'em.

Texas A&M - ruining 5-star recruits since 2012

For over 55 years, I have been a faithful fan of Aggie Football. Thru thick and thin, I have remained steadfast in my loyalty and support for the coaches and athletes.
How have I been rewarded? Mostly with anguish and disappointment. Every time it feels like we are close, we fold. We are truly the Charlie Brown of major college football. Lucy will always pull the ball away.
It is time to end this insanity. I will no longer follow or support Aggie Football. You have been a cruel b**ch and like my ex-wife I must now leave you to follow higher pursuits.
Good luck to all on TexAgs

In honor of the end of racism at Missouri I am conducting a posting strike effective immediately and will remain until Spav is fired or resigns from the position of Offensive Coordinator at Texas A&M. Changes need to happen. History will thank us in the end. It will be tough, but we all will prevail and be better off at the end.

Swag has been pretty cool. Swag, #wrts, Kanye, alternative uniforms and #whosenext were fun and they helped us past the truth that we were an above average team. Of course, that was when we had JFF. Now, sans JFF, this whole swag thing stinks to hell. We are now just a bad team with a bunch of smoke and mirrors. We have become the laughing stock of the SEC.

And you are figuring this out NOW? I was one of the few guys on this board that criticized SWAG & WRTS and all that other SH*T when it started to take hold 3+ years ago and I got stabbed for that. I don't care about playing music at practice, I don't care about freaking fireworks when the team enters the field or blowing smoke onto the field (we sure as hell blow a lot of smoke around here, don't we?). Don't care about all that; don't care about 20 different types of uni's. OK, so maybe I am older than most on this board, but back in the day teams were scared to come to Kyle Field, teams didn't want to play us, because they knew Kyle Field was the meanest, bad assed college stadium in the nation. RC didn't shoot rockets in the air, we didn't blow smoke all over the tunnel; we just ran out there and played football and won games. Don't want to relive the past, but gosh damn, we aren't cutting it right now. And of all things, we do a stupid halftime card trick to inform the world that we are going to raise $4BILLION for what? $4BILLION? Perfect timing to start a drive to get $4BILLION!

PUT IN JOHNNY!!
Here's there... Just sayin

Maybe they'll dial up the Statue of Liberty at some point, just to mock us.

I muat be a masochist because i am still watching this ****.

Andre Ware last week saying how great Kyler is and how he is better than JFF just sounds so stupid right now.

See ya'll next season. Neat.

i hope every time spav walks by a table he stubs his toe. Fuck you spav

I hate everything. Thanks for throwing away the hype I had for this season, offense. I would appreciate if you could at least make the necessary changes to salvage what you can, instead of being complacent with this trash.

At least LSU is getting fucking steamrolled, I can always take pleasure in that.

That's it, sorry guys. I'm done with this team the rest of the season. This is the most disorganized, discombobulated A&M team I've ever seen and we look fucking embarrassing. I'm fucking done.

Does Spav have pictures of Sumlin snorting coke off a Chippendale dancers cock or something? That's the only reason I can think to maintain that motherfucker who is squandering this much talent on offense and ruining multiple quarterbacks

Well, I'll see you peeps for the first half of next season

I'm switching to straight, hard liquor.

For once, I'm glad I'm at a wedding and can't watch the game. Now to get embarrassingly drunk and upset my fiancée.

Well we may not be able to move the ball, but at least we make up for it by not giving a shit

It blows my mind how much fucking talent we have, and how much we just piss it the fuck away.

The Aggie guide to tackling:
Step one: Curl your arms against your own chest.
Step two: Hurl your body at the runner.
Step three: Fall down.

*puts down beer bottle, opens the bourbon.

Wheel route. God no.
PTSD BAS.

Geez I feel bad for chavis, it's like he left a nice cruise ship for the titanic

SPARTY


BURN IN FUCKING HELL EVERY LAST ONE OF YOU FUCKINGPIECE OF SHIT CORNFUCKERS. I PRAY TO GOD THAT YOU ALL GET TRAPPED IN A CAGE WITH JOE PATERNO. YOU ARE ALL FUCKING PATHETIC. YOUR TEAM WILL FOREVER BE IRRELEVANT. YOUR ENTIRE STATE IS TRASH. YOU WILL NEVER BE IN ANOTHER BOWL GAME. YOU WILL NEVER WIN A BIG TEN CHAMPIONSHIP. YOUR ENTIRE SEASON HAS BEEN TARNINSHED, I KNOW DAMN WELL THAT EVERY ONE OF YOU ARE JACKING OFF RIGHT NOW AND YOU FUCKING. KNOW. THAT. YOU. DO. NOT. FUCKING. DESERVE. THIS. WIN. YOU. FUCKING. INBRED. CORN. FUCKER
C O R N F U C K E R O R N F U C K E R

Wife offered to find my prostate to cheer me up but I can't even take her up on that because I stress ate Taco Bell.

Our D got exposed and it hurts. I felt bad going into this game and it's been justified. Fuck.

WAS IT THAT GOD DAMN MUCH TO ASK TO HAVE OUR COLLEGE FOOTBALL PLAYOFFS HOPES DASHED BY OHIO STATE.

Well, it's been fun. I'm going to go jump off Hubbard now.

VOID THIS FUCKING GAME. CALL IT A TIE. REFS FUCKED US SO FUCKING HARD.

FUCK YOU. ZEBRAS FUCKING STOLE THIS FROM US. FUCK THE REFS, THIS IS THE BIGGEST FUCKING TRAVESTY EVER. FIRE ALL OF THE REFS, THEY DESERVE TO BE UNEMPLOYED

GOOD FUCKING GAME REFS. ZEBRAS UPSET SPARTANS

I can understand if we lost to MSU.
I can understand if we ended up losing to OSU.
But this was such horseshit I don't want to watch any more sports ever again.

I am dead inside.

Hurray for hoops season!
So much better than football — a single loss doesn't end the season.

stick a fork in them
the coaches ARE CLUELESS. THEY SAT ON THE BALL WITH 1;47 LEFT INSTEAD OF TRYING TO GET A FIRST DOWN. PLAY NOT TO LOSE SOME MORE DANTONIO.....MORON!

 I'm going to complain about the refs and there's nothing any of you can do to stop me.
No, we weren't winning a championship with this secondary. They are absolute dogshit, and the coaches have to take some blame for being too stubborn to adjust their system to their players' limitations. But something has to be done about the ongoing marathon of incompetence that is B1G officiating. Absolutely inexcusable. I'm going to break out the emergency whiskey. You all have a good night doing whatever it is you do to cope with cosmic bullshit such as this.

what's the opposite of the dance of joy?
stomp of despair?
trot of misery?
saunter of hopelessness?

I am unhappy.

FROGS

GettyImages-496169146.0.0.jpg

Fuck
That's all

We need to change our uniform color to some variant on red. Appears to make losing a positive with this whole cfp crowd.


Reminds me of an Anne Frank movie I saw once...
The family was sitting at the table and could hear the Germans breaking down the door. The Father said, "We can stop living our lives in fear and start living them with hope..." I think that will all the close games and injuries, the fans and the team have lived with the fear that this day would come. Hats off to the Cowboys, they played with fire. I think that Boykin tried too hard to carry the team; the 4 picks were tough, but the dude still had 2 TD's and 518 total yards. I think that the Frogs should start playing like they have nothing to lose since they don't. OSU and OU look like teams to beat (not sold on Baylor anymore after the game with KSU; OU is going to use their running backs and I don't think Baylor can stop them; and we know the Bear record in Stillwater); we need to prepare for OU and then Baylor; not dead yet. Lots of adversity, especially if Doctson is out, but might as well go down swinging...

So, this is how the world ends.

Just poured out my whole drink
need to go fill it up and then pour it out again.

Hello darkness, my old friend. Chick fil a Peach Bowl, here we come.

My only consolation is that OSU will rip Baylor a new asshole too.

Well, at least i'm about to get my life and weekends back.

Building character is more important than national championships.

Does anyone have 15 ft of rope and a footstool I can borrow?

Headed to Hulen bridge to end it

Kill me now

Welp... How are you guys spending the evening?" "Grocery shopping

I think tonight qualifies as a bed crapping.

It's never too late. I'm thinking about buying purple and gold leisure suit and going on a corndog diet.

We need to change the sheets
The bed is full of shit

no amount of fucking profanity is good enough to cover this dogshit
fuck these short DBs

fuck that shit
That call was OBVIOUS FUCK EVERYONE ON DEFENSE.
PUT IN THE 3RD STRINGERS

Gosh damn this defense is a fucking clown show

Landshart

fuck this goddamn useless defense
why do they keep biting on play action why sweet baby ballsack

Fuck this shitty fucking piss ass junior high dick sucking defense
And the shitty coaches that fucking coach it

MAN FUCK THIS DEFENSE SO HARD WITH A RED HOT POKER FUCK IT ALL

That's WAOM for anyone that didn't know and we will lose this game

Welp, bye.
Gonna watch Glee. Fuck all of football in its entirety.

fucking goddamn motherfucking bullshit

Fire that mother fucking whole god damn staff fuck high freeze that buck tooth fuckkmg shitty fucking coach
And fuck this entire team

ONLY ......
Ole Miss can do it up like this.
And fuck all you fans for sitting on your asses expecting to win/or lose.
Why not cheer, you are at a football game.
Our fanbase, would have never attended the Coliseum in Rome.

Anybody still want to change the mascot to the Landsharks?
If so, fuck off.

Woe is we...

God fucking damnit shit balls this shit is infuriating. Fuck football. I'm done watching Ole Miss football. I would rather cover my ass in honey and sit in a fire ant bed, than have to watch that shit again. Where the Fuck is the Ole Miss defense. Why did they miss so many fucking tackles. Wtf is this bullshit. Fuck this bullshit.

Yeah i'm salty the Ole Miss defense looked like a bunch of toddlers waddling around their play room looking for their teddy bear.

I hate my life.

Did Ole Miss just recruit some guys to run around in the general vicinity of wide recievers?

My kid just asked me "what's fucking timeout mean"
What I just witnessed confirms that God hates us. Are you FUCKING kidding me on that 4th and 25 conversion!?

After the Auburn game last year I converted to nihilism and haven't looked back. I'm serious.

I highly recommend it btw. There is no God, everything is nothing, and Ole Miss doesn't matter, outside of the mold of the social event mask that you out on to stay on an even keel until the great void consumes you, as it consumes all.

I feel like a psychopath.

It will be OK. We'll get another shot at maybe getting into the West Championship game in 10 or 15 years.

I'm just glad we open next season against FSU. All our best players will be gone and we will get gutter raped on national TV. Gets me all warm and fuzzy on the inside.

There is more top NFL talent on this team than any of us are likely to see again in our lifetime. And we are about to win 7 games this year.

Get a warrant you fat fuck

Fucking titty Sprinkle

One of the top WAOM moments of all time