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RBR Tailgating: Turkey Leftover Quesadillas

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You did your cooking bit for the holiday. Sit back and make something easy for the game that everyone tells you matters.

I can’t tell you what, but Gary Danielson is going to do something to tick me off to no end during this game.

His typical infuriating in-game comment begins with an “I don’t knoooowwww.” He picks up on something that might seem game changing, waits for the instant replay to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that he’s wrong, and then says “I really don’t know.”

What’s so infuriating about the Gary question moments is that they get ensconced in the lore of opposing fan bases. Mount Cody’s helmet came off after the clock ran out in 2009. Blocked kick number two. Gary left an entire fan base with the - and to be fair they aren’t the most capable thinkers - idea that they were robbed of the game because a nose tackle reacted post game to a great play with an easily falsifiable non-personal foul. How many negatives did I just posit? Damn it, Gary. You turn us right round baby right round.

I’ll admit that I’ve enjoyed Gary more this year than I have in the past. In some ways, I look forward to his calls. Not so long ago, it was Verne charmingly serving up gaffes; saying he was in Fayetteville when he wasn’t and asking about Brittany. Now we get Gary talking about the importance of the eleventh rather than twelfth man in reference to the crowd. He may have been referencing the absence of White in the first half of the LSU game and saying the crowd would fill in, but that’s an extraordinary Christian interpretation of what was said. I believe he recognized, subconsciously, what inanity Verne brought to the show and is doing his damndest to maintain a possibly lost standard. We’ll see.

So there will be a non-hold or a clean pass coverage that on replay rightly doesn’t get a call and Gary will leave a trail of “Wow” and “Hmm” and introduce into the canon of the barners that the game was illegitimate.

Of course, the Aubs could win. Any game is a blah, blah, blah. They have a good defense and a qb with a great arm but seemingly no discipline and his trajectory this year is not encouraging. Gus has shown us time and again that he’s no Crash Davis. Sorry, Nuke La-Stidham. There doesn’t seem to be a Ms. Savoy on the plains. Again, anything can happen. Rose goes in the front big guy.

You likely cooked a bunch this week and have a bit of turkey sitting around waiting to be plied from the carcass. Let’s take this week easy, sit back and nosh with no to little kitchen mess. Giving thanks takes a lot of energy and you deserve a break today ™.

This is relatively fast food from home, but you could make this infinitely complex if you set your mind to it.

Leftover Turkey Quesadillas Made Easy

- leftover precooked pulled turkey, white or dark

- cheese (see below)

- jalapenos, minced and de-seeded

- some cultured cream or crème (see below)

- a salsa or taco sauce of varying quality

- tortillas

- yellow onion, diced

You’ve done your part. You made your thankful bit of national pride and Thanksgiving was a rousing success. It’s time to relax. Why the hell should you work yourself silly over another meal within a week.

The gourmand would have started 24 hours ahead and tainted two cups of heavy cream with two tbsps of buttermilk, left it covered in a not so warm corner of the kitchen and rejoice in the marvel that is crème fraiche. This is not the weekend for the gourmand. Leftovers minus exertion call for sour cream instead. It’s really inexpensive and leaves you not wondering what to do with all that left over buttermilk.

Cheese can be anything you like within reasons of taste, but to paraphrase P.J. O’Rourke for what may be the thousandth time in this series, a nuclear breeder reactor won’t properly melt real cheese. Your best to buy a cheddar with the local market chain’s name on it. Now you’re cooking with gas, as they say.

If you want a salsa that screams fresh and makes someone you pretty much think would spend special romantic time with you tip over the edge, I have that recipe here. But what the hell? You cooked a turkey, mashed potatoes, spiced dressing, cranberried cranberries, and probably heated up some bread. If that didn’t do it, maybe it wasn’t meant to be. So if none of that turned the corner try some of this Taco Bell Hot Sauce instead.

It costs about a buck eighty and you can get it at any grocery store. What exactly do you think will get accomplished this weekend post the 22nd?

So take your large tortilla and put a bunch of the stuff I mentioned above in it.

Grill.

Top with more “salsa” and a whole ton of “crème fraiche.”

Nobody invested much of anything in this week’s tailgate. Just a bunch of stuff we had before.

Save the good stuff for when it’s needed.

Enjoy, No Injuries, and Roll Tide.