It is probably not an exaggeration to dub Illinois’s improbable win over Wisconsin as the “Biggest Upset of the College Football Season”. First off, there have not been too many upsets this season among ranked Power 5 teams. South Carolina’s upset over Georgia was unexpected but not out of the realm of possibilities. But this Illini shocker... Woo Boy. Consider that the Illini were 30.5 point underdogs and have not had a winning season since 2011, three coaches ago. The Badgers hadn’t trailed all season, and did not trail in this one until the Illinois kicker nailed a 39-yard field goal as time expired. That is the definition of big-time upset.

UPSETS BIG AND SMALL

Illinois 24 Wisconsin 23 - Were you like me, so sick of the national media harping on Wisky because we aren’t giving them “the respect they deserve”? It’s because we’ve been down this road many times. We all knew the Badgers would eventually blow a game. We just didn’t know it would be against a perennial doormat who hasn’t had a winning season since a 7-6 Ron Zook gem back in 2011.

While the announcers were gushing over TayTay, guess who fumbled in the fourth quarter with 7 minutes left. The Illini went the other way on four plays cutting the lead to 23-21. On the next possession, Wisky threw a pick at the UI 45 yard line. The “top defense in the country” could not contain the firepower of the 110th rated offense as Illinois put together a time-devouring drive of 9 plays and 32 yards that ate up the final 2:32, resulting in the game winning field goal from the 21 yard line. Hey, Badjuhs: BUH-BYE.

Vanderbilt 21 Missouri 14 - This is what separates good coaches from really good coaches. Good coaches can get their teams up for big important games like South Carolina and West Virginia. Really good coaches can pump their teams for the Wyomings and Vanderbilts too. Barry Odom is not in the latter category. Former #22 Mizzou went from darkhorse SEC East contender to also-ran status with a bewildering loss to one of the worst P5 team, Vandy, who lost at home to lowly UNLV 34-10 only a week prior. The Tigers could not tackle or execute simple offensive plays. UM (5-2) had a season-high 12 penalties for 120 yards.

BYU 28 Boise 25 - The Mormons have become real Goliaths as of late. They can beat the big boys - Tennessee and Southern Cal - but lose to the Davids - Toledo and USF??? It make sense then that they would ruin the Smurfs perfect record. The Potato-eaters were down to their second quarterback but the Mormons were on QB #3, freshman Baylor Romney who threw for 221 yards and two touchdowns in his first career start.

Georgia Tech 28 Manny, Dan Enos & The ‘U’ is Back Movement 21 (OT) - The Yeller Jackets got the ball first in overtime and scored a touchdown. Miami was not able to score on their possession. L.O.L. Reminder: Ga Tech lost to Citadel at home earlier this season.

THE NEAR MISS

Texas 50 Kansas 48 - Crazy Ol’ Les and his Jayhawks were SOOO close to making so many people happy. In a game played in Austin, the two teams exchanged leads six times. In typical Big XII fashion, the pair combined for 50 fourth quarter points with the final digits coming off the foot of Tejas kicker Cameron Dicker as time expired. Booo.

STILL UNBEATEN... FOR NOW

Clemson 45 Louisville 10 - What a joke of a schedule. The only team on CU’s schedule who is currently ranked is... wait for it... Wake Frickin’ Forest at #25.
Oklahoma 52 West Virginia 14 - One win for Okie against a team with a winning record: Texas at 5-2. Things get much tougher for Jalen’s crew. Of their final five games, four have winning records (@KSU, ISU, Baylor, @OKSt), and TCU is 3-3.
Baylor 45 Oklahoma State 27 - The Bears have already beaten ISU, K-State, and Okie Lite. They get Okie and Texas in back-to-back weeks, but at least the games are both in Waco.
Penn State 28 Michigan 21 - PSU has three big games remaining - all on the road: Sparty, Minnie, anOSU.
Minnesota 42 Rutgers 7 - The only FBS team the G-Gophers have beaten who have a winning record is Nebraska (4-3). Tick... Tick... Tick...
SMU 45 Temple 21 - The AAC is tough this year. The Pony Express still has @HOU, @MEM, @NAVY, and vs TULN. It was fun while it lasted...
Appalachian State 52 UL Monroe 7 - Appy should be favored in the rest of their games, except for a trip to Columbia, South Carolina November 9th - a winnable game for the Mountaineers.

SEC

Florida 38 South Carolina 27 - This game was much closer than the score indicates. It was a 24-20 UF lead when QB Ryan Hilinski was sacked and fumbled giving the Gators the ball at the SC 29. Florida would score four plays later 31-20. On the next Gamecocks possession, Will Muschamp opted to go for a first down on 4th & 2 on his own 38 and 7:12 remaining, but turned the ball over on downs. The Gators again drove to the goal line and this time executed one of the most obviously pick plays you will ever see for another score with no hankies thrown. Earlier in the half, UF had a guy hold a Gamecocks defender for a good 40 yards during a long touchdown. No flags. Muschamp has every right to be volcanic. Gators fans are back to being delusional and full of themselves.

Alabama 35 Tennessee 13 - Give UT coach Jeremy Pruitt credit - he had his team fired up and ready to play Alabama. They just don’t have the talent that the Tide has.

Every person in the solar system and most of the people on Proxima Centauri b are aware that Tua sprained his ankle and missed a good portion of the game. The silver lining is that his departure from the game seemed to wake his teammates up and make them work harder. The defense was flying around like days of yore, and the offensive line was blowing Vols off the line, while Najee Harris and Brian Robinson were running angry. No matter who the quarterback is, when a Bama team plays like that, they are unstoppable.

LSU 36 Mississippi State 13 - Joe Burrow. That is all.

Georgia 21 Kentucky 0 - An awful game on a wet sloppy day saw UGA fail to cross the 50 yard line until 6:20 to go in the third quarter. Finally, Coach Bowlcut wised up and decided to just pound the rock with D’Andre Swift (21 carr, 179 yds, 2 TD). Jake Fromm was 9 of 12 passing for 35 yards for the game.

Kentucky QB Sawyer Smith warmed up and looked ready to play, but Mark Stoops foolishly thought his gamble of using WR Lynn Bowden at quarterback would pay off two weeks in a row. He finished 2/15 passing for 17 whole yards and 99 yards rushing... and a donut on the scoreboard.

THE REST OF THE SEC

Texas A&M 24 Ole Miss 17 - This game was not one of the better moments in SEC history. TAMU QB Kellen Mond was his typical crappy self (16/28, 172 yds, 1 TD, 2 INT) but it was enough to beat the SharkBearPigThings. OM’s Matt Luke continues to randomly rotate his two QBs so neither can get in a rhythm. Bravo.
Auburn 51 Arkansas 10 - Nothing to see here. Move along.

OTHER STUFF

Indiana 34 Maryland 28 - Yikes, has any team crashed harder than Mike Locksley’s Terps (3-4, 1-3)? Indy on the other hand is all of a sudden 5-2.
Liberty 59 Maine 44 - Yeah, it’s Maine, but Hugh Freeze has dialed up his fifth win of the season. Three of his last five are easy pickings - Rutgers, UMass and N. Mex St.
Wake Forest 22 Florida State 20 - Name to know: Sage Surratt. The Demon Deacons wide receiver has 53 catches for 881 yards and 9 touchdowns in seven games. Folks are already predicting who will replace Willie Taggart at FSU.

WILD ONE

Virginia Tech 43 North Carolina 41 (6OT) - FBS enacted new overtime rules designed to shorten games that go into extra frames. Beginning this season, teams will begin attempting one-play two-point conversions beginning in the fifth overtime. Why does the NCAA have to get all cute? JUST BACK THE BALL UP TO THE 30 YARD LINE!

VaTech and UNC were the first pair to get this far this season. After a 31-31 tie in regulation, both teams made field goals and then scored touchdowns in the first two extra frames. Then they both missed field goals in the next two OTs. Time for 2-pointers: Fail-Fail-Fail-Convert. This is just plain silly.

THE WACKY WORLD OF DESMOND HOWARD

Whoda thunk that Corso would be the most accurate so far?

Teams in BOLD below already have one loss. Teams with a strikethrough have more than one loss.

• DESI - 1. Georgia (SEC Champs), 2. Clemson (ACC Champs), 3. Oregon (PAC Champs), 4. Wisconsin (B1G Champs); Iowa State (B12 Champs); Clemson over Georgia in the CFP final.
• CORSO - 1. Alabama (SEC Champs), 2. Clemson (ACC Champs), 3. Utah (PAC Champs), 4. Ohio State (B1G Champs); Oklahoma (B12 Champs); Alabama over Utah.
• HERBIE - 1. Alabama (SEC Champs), 2. Clemson (ACC Champs), 3. Ohio State (B1G Champs), 4. Texas (B12 Champs); Washington (PAC Champs); Alabama over Clemson.

MY PICKS

• 1. Clemson (ACC Champs), 2. Alabama (SEC Champs) 3. Ohio State (B1G Champs), 4. Georgia; Oklahoma (B12 Champs); Washington (PAC Champs); Alabama over Georgia.

BAMA STRENGTH OF SCHEDULE

No help from these guys.

• Duke (4-3) - The Blue Devils got trampled by UVa 48-14. The Dookies turned it over five times while the Wahoos had five scoring drives of 40 or fewer yards. Next is the hatefest @UNC.
• New Mexico State (0-∞) - All your wins are belong to us.
• Southern Miss (4-3) - The Screaming Eagles got waxed by Louisiana Tech 45-30. A sure win comes their way at Rice. [Side Note: LaTech has won six straight after an opening loss to Tejas. They are coached by Skip Holtz, so we cannot adopt them]
• Western Carolina (1-6) - The Fightin’ Cupcakes really REALLY suck. After scoring on the first play from scrimmage, they gave up 59 straight points to mediocre Wofford.
• BONUS: SC lost.

ADOPT-A-TEAM

• Iowa State (5-2) - The Cyclones win at Texas Tech 34-24. One more tune up against Okie Lite before they upset Okie on Nov. 9.
• UL-Laf (5-2) The Ragin’ Napiers won a big road game at Arky Lite 37-20. An off week, then an easy one against Texas State.
• K-State (4-2) The Wildcats scored a late TD to nip TCU 24-17. Big bad Oklahoma comes a-callin’.

Potential Adoption

• Tulane (5-2) The Green Wave got whooped at Memphis 47-17. At Navy.
• SMU (7-0) - The ‘Stangs win again, 45-21 over Temple. They are at Houston on Thursday.

Adoption Probation

• Wyoming (5-2) The Cowpokes would have been disowned if they had lost to New Mexico. But they won 23-10. They should get No. 6 against Nevada.
• Hawaii (4-3) - The Rainbow Warriors were whooped by Air Force Academy 56-26.

COUSINS

• Troy (3-3) - The Trojans defeat USA 37-13. Bad Team Beats Really Bad Team. Film At Eleven. Next @GaState.
• South Alabama (1-6) - One loss away from purgatory. Next up, Appy State! Yep, that oughta do it.

THAT ANNOYING STEP-BROTHER WHO CLIPS HIS TOENAILS IN YOUR BED

UAB (6-1) - Of course, the Blazers obliterated Old Dominion (when did ODU become FBS, much less C-USA? They just let anybody in FBS these days) by the score of 38-14. ODU put up a grand total of 150 yards. Now it’s a week off to prepare for Tennessee!

SALUTE TO OUR TROOPS

The Academies flexing their muscles.

• Army (3-4) - The Black Knights have dropped three in a row including this 28-21 heartbreaker at Georgia State in the driving rain. Hopefully, they get right hosting San Jose Canseco State.
• Navy (5-1) - The Midshipmen are a win away from bowl eligibility after a dominating 35-3 win over the drowning South Florida Bulls. Navy had 434 rushing yards for an average of 7.4 per carry. Next is a tough home test against Tulane.
• Air Force (5-2) - The Falcons put up some squiggly numbers on Hawaii scoring three touchdowns in the second and fourth quarters alone for an impressive 56-26 battering in Honolulu. They will host Utah State late Saturday night on ESPN2.

ELIMINATED

PREVIOUSLY ELIMINATED:

NEWLY ELIMINATED:

• Wisconsin - Sorry, nobody comes back from losing to Illinois.
• Michigan - The Wolverines are staring straight down the barrel of 8-4.

ENDANGERED

• Clemson
• Oregon, Utah
• Minnie, PSU
• UGA, Fla, Aub
• Baylor
• Notre Dame

A way WAY WAY too early look at the College Football Playoff (CFP) picture:

• ACC - Clemson needs to be getting more rat poison. Keep telling them how awesome they are!
• Big Ten - Wisconsin is toast. PSU won’t go away. Ohio State - no change.
• Big 12 - Winner of Baylor-Okie doke.
• PAC-12 - Oregon thinks they are in the running because of a win over a mediocre Washington. But who have they beaten or are going to beat that impresses you? The only currently ranked teams on their schedule are Auburn (lost) and #24 Arizona State who they play in late November. Utah’s only ranked opponent is also Az State. The Utes actually trail Southern Cal for the divisional lead at this time. lol
• SEC - Alabama, LSU...
• Indies - Notre Dame is going to need a bunch of others to lose.

SPOILERS?

• ACC - Can NCState or Wake beat Clemson?
• Big Ten - Iowa, Wisky!
• Big 12 - Baylor, ISU
• PAC-12 - not applicable
• SEC - Auburn
• Indies -

RANK ‘EM IF YOU GOT ‘EM

The Southeastern Conference makes up half of the Top 10.

#1 Alabama
#2 LSU
#7 Florida
#9 Auburn
#10 Georgia

Here is my after-seven-weeks-half-ass Top 5+ rankings.

1. Ohio State
2. LSU - Haven’t blinked yet...
3. Alabama - prove me wrong, Tide.
4. Oklahoma
5. Clemson/Penn State

LET’S GO BOWLING

• 40 bowl games; 126 eligible teams (add one more if Mizzou unlikely wins their appeal).
• Rice, New Mexico State, and Akron are each 0-7.
• UConn, Rutgers, Old Dominion, South Alabama, and UMass are a defeat away from joining them on the December sidelines.
• 23 teams have at least 6 wins. Another 23 (incl. Mizz) are a win away.

STATS OF THE DAY

• Tim Tebow’s “Freak of the Week” was Kylin Hill who proceeded to gain 34 yards on 15 carries against LSU. Please, Tim. Don’t pick any Bama players.
• God’s Gift to the World threw his seventh and eighth interceptions of the season. Only five FBS quarterbacks have more.
• 4,749 days (13 years and 1 day) since Tennessee has beaten Alabama.

Krazy Kristi’s “SHUT UP!” of the Week goes to the SEC officials. Not only did they lose the game for South Carolina, they are simply throwing way too many ticky-tack flags this season.

HEISMAN HYPE

With the exception of TWO YEARS, the Heisman Trophy voting is basically a hype award. Often times voters fall in love with someone and refuse to REALLY look at what a player has accomplished.

WHO WILL WIN

CLARIFICATION: This section is not who deserves to win. It is who the slobbering press and other voters will callously crush on (see last year).

The national press must be SO relieved. Now they have a reason to not laud Tua.

• Joe Burrow (QB LSU Sr.) - The Tigers QB has been pretty awesome. Saturday was no exception (25-32, 327 yds, 4 TD, 0 INT). If I am going to nit-pick, LSU started slow, he did fumble again but recovered, and was sacked three times.
• Jalen Hurts (QB Oklahoma Sr.) - Jalen continues his run (16/17, 316 yds, 3 TD, 0 INT; 10 car, 75 yds, 2 TD) but we are still waiting for him to face a decent defense. K-State could pose a challenge. Next four are vs ISU, @BAY, vs TCU, and @OKST.

WHO SHOULD WIN

CLARIFICATION: This section IS for who deserves to win it.

1. Burrow
2. Tua still deserves consideration, though many have written him off.
3. Justin Fields (QB anOSU Soph.) Had four four scores through the air, but he’s not really getting anyone’s blood pumping. We’ll see how he does against a pisst off Wisky on Saturday.
4. Jalen - God bless him, he is still the same QB he was a year ago.

Runner-Ups

• Tua Tagovailoa (QB Alabama Jr.) - Except for the baffling thrown interception, Tua completed all of 11 his passes before exiting the game. He would have to do something amazingly heroic against LSU to get back in this race.
• Jonathan Taylor (RB Wisconsin Jr.) - The “Wut about TayTay??!?!?!” campaign has hit a roadblock. Over 100 yards rushing (although 4.7 ypc) but he lost a fumble deep in Illinois territory up 23-14 that could have been the knockout punch. Instead, it turned into a monumental upset that nobody is going to forget anytime soon.

If I had a vote:

• I hate to say it but Burrow has been pretty darn good. But it’s still October...

THE SICK REPORT

• Just in case you just recently came out of a coma, Alabama QB Tua Tagovailoa has a right high-ankle sprain and will miss the Arkansas game. Tom Brady 2.0 Mac Jones is the projected starter. Third-teamer Taulia Tagovailoa has participated in just two games this season and could possibly get snaps and still retain his redshirt.
• Kentucky will be without Key & Peele All-Star RB Kavosiey Smoke (333 yds, 3 TD) against Missouri after being sidelined with a shoulder injury.
• Oklahoma has lost starting LB Jon-Michael Terry to season-ending “lower-leg” injury.
• Former UGA and Miami head coach and all-around good guy Mark Richt had a heart attack early Monday but he anticipates a quick recovery. He has been working at the ACC Network (not that anyone noticed since nobody gets or watches the network).

DRAMA

• The Sooner Schooner took a spill on Saturday (it wasn’t the first time, and won’t be the last). No horse was injured, so it’s okay to laugh. Oh, yeah. The people were okay too. Ya know, it may be time to retire this silliness.
• Urban Meyer pushed a busload of orphans off a cliff to see if they would bounce. They did not.
• Recently, a Taiwan bridge collapsed, killing as many as six people. The whereabouts of Fat F*** Phil Fulmer at the time of the incident have yet to be substantiated.

EYEBALLS

Last week’s Alabama-Texas A&M game on CBS drew 6.11M viewers. It was surpassed by only Texas-Oklahoma (7.25M) and Florida-LSU (6.45M), but beat out games such as Penn State-Iowa (3.7M), SC-UGA (3.25m), Southern Cal-Notre Dame (3.16M), and FSU-Clemson (2.54M).

THIS WEEK

College GameDay is ridiculously going to South Dakota State for some stupid FCS game. How quaint. The guest picker will be Farmer Jeff since nobody famous ever came from South Dakota. More appropriately, SEC Nation will be in Red Stick this weekend for Aub-LSU.

(Below is an abbreviated list of games of interest. If you REALLY need to know about the big UConn-UMass-UMad showdown, you can find the details here.)

Thursday, October 24

SMU at Houston 6:30/7:30 ESPN - Can the Mustangs keep things rolling against the Quitters?

Friday, October 25

Southern Cal at Colorado 7pm/8pm ESPN2 - Get to bed early. It’s a big day of CFB watching tomorrow.

Saturday, October 26

SEC:

Bye weeks for Fla and UGA before the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party. Vandy and Ole Miss will rest as well. It’s getting down to desperation time for several of these SEC teams.

Mississippi State (3-4) at Texas A&M (4-3) 11am/noon SECN - DESPERATION GAME I!
South Carolina (3-4) at Tennessee (2-5) 3pm/4pm SECN - DESPERATION GAME II! Who will better get over their hangover?
Missouri (5-2) at Kentucky (3-4) 6:30/7:30 SECN - DESPERATION GAME III!

ELIMINATION GAME!

Auburn at LSU 2:30/3:30 CBS - Is this one of those games where Aubie shows up and ruins everything? LSU is favored by 12!

NATIONAL:

The national picture will clear up a smidge before Alabama kicks off in the evening.

Wisconsin at Ohio State 11am/noon FOX - Can Wisky recover from their embarrassing upset? I’m guessing no.
Oklahoma at Kansas State 11am/noon ABC - Can K-State be a spoiler? They are giving up only 18.7 ppg.
Penn State at Michigan State 2:30/3:30 ABC - PSU is overdue for a stupid loss.
Notre Dame at Michigan 6:30/7:30 ABC - Either the Wolverines eliminate the Irish once and for all, or Jim Harbaugh gets nudged a little further out the door.

TO SLEEP, PERCHANCE TO DREAM:

Cal at Utah 9pm/10pm FS1 - The Utes still think they are in the playoff running. Bless their hearts.
Utah State at Air Force 9:15/10:15 ESPN2 - A sneaky tough game for the Falcons as they look for their magical 6th win.
Washington State at Oregon 9:30/10:30 ESPN - Could the Dux be looking ahead to their game with Southern Cal? Prolly not.

#ALABAMA

FROSH

• Freshmen starters included LB Shane Lee (4 solos, 2 asst, 0.5 sack, QBH), LB Christian Harris (3 solos, 5 asst, sack, forced fumble), defensive tackle DJ Dale (2 solo, 1 TFL), offensive guard Evan Neal and the first start for DE Byron Young * (3 asst).
• RB Keilan Robinson - (5th game, no redshirt) 3 rushes, 6 yards .
• DB Jordan Battle * - 2 solos.
• DE Justin Eboigbe (5th game, no redshirt) - no stats.
• WR John Metchie * - no stats.
• DB DeMarcco Hellams * - no stats.
• P Will Reichard (5th game, no redshirt) - 33 yard punt.
• P Ty Perine (first game) - 51 and 42 yard punts, asst tackle.
• Marcus Banks, King Mwikuta, and Darrian Dalcourt have participated in 5 games but did not play against Tennessee.

* 7 games played.

CLASSIC MACK

A classic Mack Brown moment on Saturday occurred in the third overtime on UNC’s possession after the Hokies had missed a field goal. The Tar Heels had 4th & 12 at the 17 and a chance for 35 yard field goal attempt for the win, when Brown calls... a timeout!!?!!???!?!?! If it was his intention to ice his own kicker, it worked. The kid missed and overtime resumed. Bravo.

Nick Saban increases his lead in career wins as a FBS/I-A coach over Brown and others. If you haven’t heard, he has beaten his former assistants a lot.

X

Xavier McKinney has been named one of 14 Thorpe Award semifinalists. Of course they will give it to Grant Delpit because he gets all the hype despite an average performance this season.

HOMECOMING

• Former Tide wide receivers Tyrone Prothro and Prince Wimbley will be signing autographs at 4pm at the Chevrolet Tent.
• Former LB Derrick Oden and DB Antonio Lanham are honorary captains and will sign autographs at the Hibbert Sports tent at 5pm.
• Signing at Denny Chimes at 5pm will be the reigning SEC Champs and World Series Final Four Softball team. BTW, that is superstar pitcher Montana Fouts in the little red dress. (⊙L⊙) (◉.◉)

GAME 7: Saturday, October 26, 2019

Arkansas at Alabama

Bryant-Saban Stadium, Tuscaloosa, AL ~ 6:00pm/7:00pm, ESPN

• Announcers: Dave Pasch and Greg McElroy with Tom Luginbill (not blonde).
• Eli Gold on Alabama Radio.
• Alabama is 22-7 all-time against the Hogs. The Tide have won 12 straight in the series. The last loss by Bama to Arky was in Mike Shula’s final season.
• Bama is favored by 32½ with an over/under of 55.
• The next Saturday is a bye week before LSU comes to town and the circus that will follow. Man, the season is just flying by! Savor it!

#RollTide

POLL