Emergency Hoodoo

Yeah, we need one of these to make sure Loki is appeased. This post is going to be short and sweet but worth it.

First story:

My friend and I went to check out the new engineering building that South Alabama had built. We graduated the year before it was finished. Beforehand we decided to get some mellow mushroom before we toured the building, hoping it was open.

We downed a large pizza and I was three root-beers deep. We parked all the way across campus; stupid idea. About half way to the building my stomach started acting up. I could tell that things were about to get dicey.

We hurried to the building hoping and praying it was open. Thankfully it was open. I ran in the bathroom and held on for dear life. After what seemed like an eternity I emerged, unscathed. My friend had been in the hall the whole time and said "I could hear that from out here".

Second story:

My sophomore year in college I cam down with a pretty bad fever for a few days. Afterward I contracted the stomach bug. Unfortunately for me, I was unaware of this since I didn't feel bad at all. So I am standing in the hall of my parent's house, right out side the bathroom, and go to let out a fart....being discrete as possible. Well that fart turned out to be more than that. So I basically shit myself 5 feet from the toilet.

Third story:

Back in 2011 we moved by grandparents to Mobile since they were getting on up in age. My gf (wife now) and I were driving one of their cars back from Selma, AL. We had stopped at McDonalds to get a bite to eat and then hit the road. Well a few hours out, in the middle of nowhere, my stomach started feeling some extreme pain. Like someone trying to punch their way out. Finally we found a gas station out in the middle of nowhere. I almost lost it getting out of the car, all the while my gf was laughing herself silly. I can't type what happened in the bathroom but it was a good thing that no one else was in there. Crisis adverted.

Those are my humble stories I offer up as a sacrifice to Loki. May the Tide roll in Atlanta this weekend and vanquish the bulldogs. RT!

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