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Random Thoughts: A Case of the Blahs

All the College Football news, scores, injuries, gaffes, upsets, derps, and snark that you can handle.

COLLEGE FOOTBALL: OCT 22 Iowa at Ohio State
A historically bad offense.
Photo by Frank Jansky/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images

It was not the most exciting of college football weekends. Several teams had their bye week including five SEC teams. Only 17 of the Top 25 ranked teams were in action. A sparse five games highlighted match-ups of ranked teams. The nailbiters and upset were few and far between.

UNDEFEATED NO MORE

LSU 45 Ole Miss 20 - The Rebs led 17-3 until LSU QB Jayden Daniels (21-28, 248 YDS, 2 TD, 23 CAR, 121 YDS, 3 TD) started to heat up. The Tigers would outscore OM 42-3 the rest of the way as the Shark defense looked more like guppies. OM QB Jaxson Dart (19-34, 284 YDS, 1 INT, 10 CAR, 7 YDS) was pretty lousy. Starting Rebels running back Zach Evans was dressed but did not play due to a leg injury.

Clemson 27 Syracuse 21 - After talking up DJ Uiegelelele all week, Clemson fell behind 21-7 and Dabo benched his crappy overrated QB (13/21, 138 YDS, 0 TD, 2 INT, 1 FUM). Cade Klubnik didn’t really do much (2/4-19-0-0, 6 CAR-15 YDS), but it was enough to spark 20 unanswered points. CU was also the beneficiary of some referee shenanigans (see above).

After the game, Dabo doubled down saying “As far as DJ, DJ’s our starter, DJ’s our leader. Nothing’s changed there.”

Oregon 45 UCLA 30 - Gee. Who saw this coming besides everyone? Chip Kelly returned to Eugene with an overrated overhyped Bruins team and got stomped. It was a tight game until the Dux recovered an unexpected onside kick. Momentum took over and Bo Nix went off passing for 5 TDs on 22-28, 283 yard passing.

SEC

Alabama 30 Mississippi State 6 - Merciful Saban put some scrubs in the game late and blew a chance at three straight Tuscaloosa shutouts against the Bullies.

South Carolina 30 Texas A&M 24 - The Gamecocks scored on the opening kickoff and never trailed. SC jumped out to 17-0 lead but the Aggies kept it close most of the game. When Haynes King was injured in the 4th quarter, highly touted frosh Conner Weigman entered the game and kinda sucked (8/15, 91 YDS). Most of his yards came late when SC was playing prevent defense.

The Aggs outgained the ‘Cocks 398 to 286 and had more first downs 23 to 13. and SCar beats TAMU for the first time in program history. Cocky has won four straight and is a win away from bowl eligibility. A&M is (chuckle) 3-4 overall and 1-3 in the conference. The Aggies will need to win three out of their final five of vs OM, vs FLA, @AUB, vs UMass, vs LSU.

Poll

Will Texas A&M get to six regular season wins?

This poll is closed

  • 31%
    No way.
    (244 votes)
  • 64%
    They will win exactly six.
    (508 votes)
  • 3%
    They will right the ship and win four or five.
    (31 votes)
783 votes total Vote Now

SEC VS CUPCAKES

Tennessee 65 UT Martin 24 - golf clap

PSUEDO SEC

Missouri 17 Vanderbilt 14 - Vandy’s Joseph Bulovas missed field goals of 45 and 27 yards.

MISLEADING FINAL SCORE

Ohio State 54 Iowa 10 - If you had not watched this game (like so many talking heads, AP voters, and Heisman voters), you would have thought this game was just a run-of-the-mill blowout. However, this was a case of two crappy offenses. It just so happens that one of them is crappy on a historic level. Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz has been stubbornly standing behind his belief that defense wins games and championships. The Hawkeyes defense is good but the offense is embarrassingly bad. They are last in FBS in total offense (227.3 ypg) and have scored a total of 73 points through seven games (10.4 ppg). On Saturday, the Iowa defense again outscored the offense with a scoop & score.

Six turnovers by the Iowa offense and a a botched fake punt (see above) gave Ohio State short fields to work with all day long. The Buckeyes had four drives start inside the Iowa 35 that netted only four field goals.

Even though the Buckeyes scored 54, they only managed 16 first downs and 360 yards of offense. OSU running back TreVeyon Henderson gained only 38 yards on 11 rush attempts and the team had 66 in 30 carries for a paltry 2.2 ypc. Media darling C.J. Stroud was 20-30, 286 YDS, 4 TD, 1 INT, and a lost fumble. But SHHHHHHH! Don’t tell anyone!

OTHER STUFF

Duke 45 Miami 21 - The Hurricanes tied an FBS record with EIGHT turnovers - 5 fumbles by 4 different players and 3 interceptions, one of which was returned for a score. The Blue Devils are now one win from bowl eligibility with four games remaining, including winnable games at Boston College and home vs Virginia Tech. The ‘U’ is still not back as they fall to 3-4.

TCU 38 Kansas State 28 - The Frogs remain unbeaten.

Tulane 38 Memphis 28 - The Green Wave is 7-1.

INTERIM FEVER MIXED RESULTS

Wisconsin 35 Purdue 24 - Jim Leonhard is 2-1 with Wisky.
Virginia 16 Georgia Tech 9 - After two wins over halfway decent teams (Pitt and Duke), Brent Key and the Yeller Jackets fell flat to lame-o UVa.
Oregon State 42 Colorado 9 - After beating Cal the previous week, the Buffs got back to their sucking ways.

LANDON DICKERSON BIG GUY MOVE OF THE WEEK

WORST TIME CLOCK AWARENESS OF THE WEEK

Les Miles approves this play.

NAME OF THE WEEK

Miami (OH) punter Dom Dzioban. College kicker, amirite?

MOST FAMILIAR NAME OF THE WEEK

This week, Christian McCaffrey was on the lips of every blithering sports personality across the country. Perhaps they should be talking about his kid brother Luke McCaffrey. The RS sophomore languished for two seasons at Scott Frost’s Nebraska as a back-up running back. He transferred to Rice and was again a reserve. Everything changed when he was moved to wide receiver where he has flourished. Against Louisiana Tech, he collected 10 balls for 171 yards and 2 TDs. He added 31 rushing yards and another score. On the season, he has 43 receptions for 555 yards and five TDs

MOST CARTOONISH HELMET OF THE WEEK

MOST BLASPHEMOUS HELMET OF THE WEEK

NCAA Football: Minnesota at Penn State
Stop trying to be Alabama.
Matthew OHaren-USA TODAY Sports

Penn State broke with tradition by putting numbers on the sides of their helmets. I’d say Joe Pa turned over in his grave but you know he is in some deep dark pit of despair waiting on his roommate Sandusky.

BEST TREND OF THE WEEK

All glory to TCU’s Hypnotoad.

KAYSHON BOUTTE/JORDAN ADDISON PEACE OUT WATCH

LSU receiver Kayshon Boutte was targeted 7 times versus Ole Miss and had 4 catches for 43 yards. He was again denied the end zone. His only score this year came against FCS/HBCU Southern University.

Jordan Addison’s Southern Cal Trojans did not play.

WACKIEST EXTRA POINT OF THE WEEK

LAMEST FAIR-WEATHER FAN BASE

MOST OBVIOUS OMEN OF THE WEEK

2022: The Boilmakers lost to Wisconsin 35-24.

STATIONARY RUNNING BACK OF THE WEEK

  • Ohio State running back Miyan Williams had 10 rush attempts for 19 yards against Iowa. That is 1.9 ypr average.

STATS OF THE WEEK

  • The Indiana Hoosiers are the first FBS team to reach 700 defeats in program history. Something for Auburn to strive for.
  • In the last five Alabama-MSU games, Clanga-clang has scored a total of 22 points.

GAMEDAY SIGN OF THE WEEK

THE WACKY WORLD OF DESI

Some weird Island of Dr. Moreau stuff going on here.

Again, I didn’t watch. Guest picker was some women’s basketball player. Did you know there was a pro women’s basketball league?

PICKER CFP CFP CFP CFP SEMI SEMI FINAL
DESI TAMU PITT BAYL MICH TAMU MICH TAMU
HERBIE ALA OSU UGA BAYL BAMA OSU OSU
POLLACK ALA OSU CLEM UTAH BAMA OSU BAMA
CORSO ALA OSU UGA UTAH BAMA OSU OSU
CB969 ALA OSU UGA CLEM BAMA OSU BAMA

This just in: Desmond Howard is still a moron.

ADOPT-A-TEAM NOMINATIONS

  • James Madison (5-2) - So.... the Dukes lost to Marshall 26-12. We may just have to go the rest of the year without an adoptee.

COUSINS

  • Troy (6-2) - The bowl eligible Trojans defeated South Alabama in an ugly ass game 10-6 and lead the Sun Belt West (4-1). Next is a trip to ULL in two weeks.
  • South Alabama (5-2) - The Jags head to Arkansas State as a -12.5 favorite. Butch fixin’ to get fired.

THAT ANNOYING GUY WHO BLOWS HIS LEAVES INTO THE STREET KNOWING THEY WILL END UP IN YOUR YARD

  • UAB (4-3) - The Dragons blew a 17-7 lead and fell to Western Kentucky 20-17 . A trip to FAU! (+5) is next on the docket.

SALUTE TO OUR TROOPS

NCAA Football: UL Monroe at Army
Army celebrates win number three on the season.
Danny Wild-USA TODAY Sports
  • Navy (2-5) - The Midshipmen predictably lost to Houston 38-20. Next is a winnable game against Temple (+13.5).
  • Army (3-4) - The Black Knights doubled up ULM on points 48-24 with 441 rushing yards. They have a week off before Game 2 of the Commander-In-Chief Trophy against Air Force.
  • Air Force (5-3) - The Falcons struggled against Boise and lost 19-14. A late TD makes it look closer. AFA has the week off as well.

Odds/lines are provided by DraftKings and subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.

boxers

ELIMINATED FROM PLAYOFF CONTENTION

Eliminated: all non-Power 5 incl. Houston, Cincinnati, BYU, FSU, Pitt, Boston College, Virginia Tech, Duke, Virginia, Miami-FL, NC State, Louisville, Georgia Tech, Notre Dame, Illinois, Purdue, Nebraska, Iowa, Wisky, Minnie, Maryland, Northwestern, Sparty, Rutgers, Indiana, Okie, Baylor, Iowa State, Kansas, West Virginia, Texas Tech, Texas, Kansas State, Cal, Stanford, Oregon State, Colorado, Arizona State, Arizona, Utah, Washington State, Washington, Mizzou, Vandy, Florida, Auburn, South Carolina, Missy State, Arky, Texas A&M, LSU, Kentucky. NEW: UCLA, Syracuse.

Premature Elimination: none

Endangered: Wake, UNC, Oregon, Alabama, Southern Cal, Okie Lite, Penn State. NEW: Ole Miss,

A way WAY WAY too early look at the College Football Playoff (CFP) picture:

DraftKings NCAAF Championship Winner 2022-23 Odds:

  1. Georgia +180
  2. Ohio State +180
  3. Alabama +340
  4. Michigan +1500
  5. Tennessee +1600
  6. Clemson +1600
  • ACC - And of course, Syracuse folded like Superman on laundry day.
  • Big 12 - Unless Okie Lite can go on some kind of a tear, TCU is the last hope for the B12.
  • Big Ten - Ohio State will eliminate Penn State this weekend.
  • PAC-12 - Oregon is looking good but it’s hard to forget that debacle back on Labor Day weekend.
  • SEC - Georgia plays Tennessee in two weeks as Alabama waits in the wings.
  • Indies - Nobody left.
  • Non-Power 5 - No undefeated non-P5s remain.

RANK ‘EM IF YOU GOT ‘EM

Strange things going on in the Palmetto state. Clemson got one first place vote in the AP and South Carolina managed to sneak in at No. 25. Seven SEC teams are ranked.

1. Georgia
3. Tennessee
6. Alabama
15. Ole Miss
18. LSU
19. Kentucky
25. South Carolina

LET’S GO BOWLING!

  • Of the 130 FBS teams, only six are still undefeated after five weeks: Clemson, Georgia, Michigan, Ohio State, fTennessee, and TCU.
  • 27 FBS teams are bowl eligible for 84 slots.

LET’S GO BLOWING!

  • There are no bowl games set for Jan. 1 because New Year’s Day falls on a Sunday and that sucks. F the NFL except for former Bama players.
  • College Football parity is here to stay. I cannot recall a time when there was not at least one winless FBS team while still in October. Only six teams have one win. Colorado is the only P5 in that category.

Krazy Kristi’s “SHUT UP!” of the Week goes to Greg Sankey and the other P5 Commissioners for doing nothing to discourage fans from rushing the field. This week it was the idiot LSU fans who stormed the field after a win. For beating Ole Miss. Yes, Ole Miss. (Wow. 2019 seems like centuries ago.) The Corndogs’ silliness should be an eye-opener when we see this sort of thing over such a humdrum win by one of the more elite programs over an overranked historically mediocre program. We’re also seeing an increase of idiots walking or running onto the field during play (and then whining when they get body slammed). I know what you are going to say. It’s a great spectacle. It’s kids having fun. BlahBlahBlah. It is only a matter of time before someone dies.

How to fix it? Fining a school as the SEC does is like stealing a nickel from Elon Musk. Even more so, fining the school does not deter the students in any way. It’s like a rich boy getting a speeding ticket and Daddy will pay for it. It won’t stop Junior from speeding. Threaten the students with worse seating, like upper deck. Or how about no alcohol sales in the student section? Even better, start arresting a few people. Just that visual would stop a lot of kids.

HEISMAN HYPE

You gotta love those short memories.

ODDS

Below are the top Heisman picks in order of the money lines. Bryce is ridiculously still fifth.

Odds are provided by DraftKings and many more options can be seen at that link including OM QB Jaxson Dart at +30000. [Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.]

  1. QB C.J. Stroud (JR, Ohio State) +220 to +350 to +260 to +140 to +160 to -130 to +110 to +100
  2. QB Hendon Hooker (SR, Tennessee) +4000 to +1600 to +1200 to +1100 to +450 to +200
  3. QB Caleb Williams (Soph, Southern Cal) +700 to +600 to +320 to +600 to +500 to +1300 to +800 to +1400
  4. RB Blake Corum (JR, Michigan) ???? to +1800 to +1800 to +1200 to +1400
  5. QB Bryce Young (JR, Alabama) from +400 to +300 to +340 to +350 to +800 to +1500 to +1800 to +2200
  6. QB Bo Nix (SR, Oregon) from ???? to +3000
  7. QB Stetson Bennett XIV (8th YR SR, UGA) is tenth highest: +1800 to +1400 to +1800 to +1800 to +2800 to +3000 to +3000
  8. RB Jahmyr Gibbs (JR, Alabama) +3000 to +3000 to +3500 to +4000 to +2000 to +2200 to +2200 to +4000
  9. QB Drake Maye (Soph, UNC) ???? to +4000

DROPPING

  • QB Dorian Thompson-Robinson (RS-JR, UCLA) ???? to +1800 to +2500 to +15000!
  • QB DJ Uiagelelei (Clemson) ???? to +2200 to +9000!
  • QB Adrian Martinez (9th YR SR, Kansas State) ???? to +1800 to +2500 to OFF THE BOARDS

PERCEPTIONS

  • Bryce Young had another solid game but the voters have that anti-repeat bias.
  • C.J. Stroud started the game with a ball thrown right into the numbers of a Hawkeye safety but it was dropped. On his next possession, he was sacked and fumbled with the ball returned for a score. In the first half, he led four field goal drives of 1, 4, 17, and 24 yards. In other words, Stroud was given several short field opportunities thanks to the defense but was not able to do much with them other than hand the ball over to his kicker. In the second half, he began with a pick and had a 3 & out. Another Iowa turnover gave OSU the ball at the 15 and Stroud threw a TD to make it 33-10. He would pad his stats after that. Had they been playing someone like Michigan or a upper tier SEC team, the score would have been reversed. But ya know what? The lazy ass voters are going to look at the final score and just assume Stroud had a big day.
  • It would have taken an epic meltdown against UT-Martin for the new flavor of the month Hendon Hooker to drop off the charts of doe-eyed sports types.

WHO SHOULD WIN

  • It is ridiculous to not have Bryce Young in the top three.
  • C.J. Stroud has been good not great. He still makes mistakes but halftime shows are only going to show so many highlights.
  • 24-year old Hendon Hooker deserves to be among the finalists.
  • I keep waiting for TCU QB Max Duggan to falter but he is hanging in there.
  • No running back or wide receiver has been overly impressive.

THE SICK REPORT

  • Miami quarterback Tyler Van Dyke injured his shoulder on a sack in the second quarter of the Canes’ embarrassing loss to Duke on Saturday and did not return to the game. After an impressive freshman campaign, he has really had a rough time under the Mario Cristobal regime. It would not be surprising if he transfers in the off-season.
  • Texas A&M will be without a three offensive linemen for the rest of the season. Bryce Foster (who was not bought) and Aki Ogunbiyi (also not bought), who have four starts apiece this season, are out with knee injuries. Jordan Spasojevic-Moko (definitely not bought), who has started two games, is out with an ankle injury.

R.I.P.

  • Mississippi State freshman OL Samuel Westmoreland was found dead on Wednesday at a church in Starkville according to TMZ. No cause of death has been released. Officials had “no reason to suspect foul play” at this point. He was two days away from celebrating his 19th birthday.
  • San Jose State football player Camdan McWright died Friday morning in a traffic crash when he was hit by a school bus while riding an electric scooter. The Spartans postponed their game with New Mexico State. He was 18 years old.

DRAMA

  • LSU was fined $250,000 for a third offense of fans on the field. (Way to waste that on Ole Miss.)
  • According to TexAgs.com head honcho Billy Liucci: “at least three and perhaps four A&M players have been suspended indefinitely by Aggie head coach Jimbo Fisher, all from the true freshman ranks.” In other words, players from that celebrated No. 1 recruiting class that Jimbo Fishy definitely did not buy.

KOACHES KORNER

  • Will Healy has been fired at Charlotte amidst his fourth season. The 1949ers are 1-7 thus far and one of the WORST teams in FBS this season. Healy was 15–24 at UNCC. It would be hard to imagine him getting another FBS head job.
  • On his off days, Urban Meyer enjoys going to the airport and dropping handguns into the purses of unsuspecting travelers.
  • NASA recently shot Fat F*** Phil Fulmer into space to deflect a meteor that was projected to hit Sanford Stadium on November 5.
Black and White TV

TEEVEE

Alabama-Tennessee averaged a 6.1 rating and 11.56 million viewers on CBS, the teams’ most-watched game on record (dating back to 1987) and the highest rated and most-watched game of the season. The previous highs were a 5.7 and 10.60 million for Alabama’s win over Texas on FOX in week two. The Tide has now played in three of the five most-watched games thus far, with their other being the W over Texas A&M.

THIS WEEK

(Below is an abbreviated list of highlighted games of interest with lines provided by DraftKings. If you REALLY need to know about the big Boston College at UConn showdown, you can find the details here.)

Thursday, October 27

Virginia Tech at NC State (-13.5) 6:30/7:30 ESPN - The Pack should roll.
ULL at Southern Miss (pick ‘em) 6:30/7:30 ESPN2 - Both teams are two wins away from bowl eligibility.
Utah (-7.5) at Washington State 9pm/10pm FS1 - #WeeknightPacAfterDark

Friday, October 28

East Carolina at BYU (-3) 7pm/8pm ESPN2 - The Mormons have lost three straight (ND, Ark, Lib); ECU has two wins in a row (Memphis, UCF).
Louisiana Tech (-6.5) at FIU 7pm/8pm CBSSN - yuck

Saturday, October 29

SEC

Alabama has the week off. If you absolutely MUST get married in October, this is is the only acceptable Saturday.

Arkansas (-4) at Auburn 11am/noon SECN - Loser is in last place in the West.
Florida at Georgia (-22) 2:30/3:30 CBS - Gonna be a lot of drunk-ass Dwags in Jax.
Missouri at South Carolina (-5) 3pm/4pm SECN - Trap game? Mizzou straight up sucks but SC is getting a tad full of themselves.
Kentucky at Tennessee (-13) 6pm/7pm ESPN - Will fUT get caught looking ahead to UGA?
Ole Miss (-2.5) at Texas A&M 6:30/7:30 SECN - This game could go any which way.

* Alabama, LSU, Vandy, and MSU have the week off.

OTHERS WORTH A GANDER

Notre Dame at Syracuse (-3) 11am/noon ABC - Who would have ever imagined that the Irish would be underdogs against a basketball school?
Ohio State (-15.5) at Penn State 11am/noon FOX - This will be a beatdown.
Oklahoma State at Kansas State (-1) 2:30/3:30 FOX - Winner is in line for the second slot of the B12CG.

NIGHTY NIGHT

Wyoming (-10.5) at Hawaii 10:59/11:59 PineappleTV - Hawaii is SO bad. They are going to regret hiring Timmy Chang.

Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.

SABAN vs. MACK, POP & BEAR

Below is a count of career FBS/Division I-A win totals for coaches.

For those of you new to RBR Random Thoughts, we count all on-field wins at the FBS/Division I-A level. So, before you go squawking about Frank Beamer, 42 of his wins came at Murray State. Mack Brown had six victories in one season with Appalachian State when they were still in what was known at I-AA (FCS today). Brian Kelly won 118 games with something called Grand Valley State. So, let’s stop talking about his win record with such reverence. In addition, we don’t recognize NCAA sanctioned forfeits. If you won on the field, it counts in our books.

Rank Name Years Wins Losses Ahead/Behind
1 Joe Paterno 46 409 136 128
2 Bobby Bowden 40 346 123 65
3 Bear Bryant 38 323 85 42
4 Pop Warner 44 319 106 38
5 Nick Saban 27 281 68 -
6 Mack Brown 33 265 135 -16
7 LaVell Edwards 29 257 101 -24
8 Tom Osborne 25 255 49 -26
9 Frank Beamer 33 238 121 -43
10 Lou Holtz 30 236 115 -45

Mack Brown and UNC had the week off. The Heels host Pitt this Saturday.

#ALABAMA

  • After the MSU game, Nick Saban mentioned wanting “to build on the chemistry of how we competed in the game today.”
  • The Crimson Tide had a few personnel changes against MSU. Namely, Eli Ricks got the start at corner over Terrion Arnold. In addition, Darian Dalcourt was back at center with Javion Cohen and Emil Ekiyor at the guards, though Tyler Booker did get plenty of snaps with the ones.
  • Saban also spoke of having a bye week to get healthy and “get some guys back”. DL Jaheim Oatis, DL DJ Dale, LB Deontae Lawson, and LB Kendrick Blackshire did not dress out for the MSU game for unannounced and unknown reasons.
  • DL Justin Eboigbe (neck) is out indefinitely and reserve LB Demouy Kennedy (knee) is out for the season. Freshman WR Aaron Anderson (knee) has not played this season.
  • Bryce Young could use a week off, as could Jahmyr Gibbs who took some pretty tough hits against MSU.
  • Tyler Harrell made his first appearance of the season and caught a 12 yard pass on 3rd &10.

GAME 9: Saturday, November 5, 2022

Alabama Crimson Tide (7-1, 4-1) at LSU Tigers (6-2, 4-1)

Baton Rouge, AL ~ 6:00pm CT/7:00pm ET, ESPN

  • Bama and LSU both have a week off before their suddenly HUGE SEC West showdown.
  • It is the same Saturday as Tennessee at Georgia. CBS has already announced that UT-UGA will be blessed with Gary’s color commentary on CBS at 2:30/3:30. The Tide and Tigers are looking at a night game in Def Valley and another loud crowd on ESPN. Announcers are TBA.
  • The early sneak peek line provided by DraftKings has Bama opening as a -16.5 favorite. The Over/Under is TBA.

Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.

Poll

Upsets?

This poll is closed

  • 7%
    UT too full of themselves loses to UK.
    (39 votes)
  • 13%
    It’s Fla’s Super Bowl and they shock a flawed UGA.
    (72 votes)
  • 8%
    Both UT and UGA are upset.
    (45 votes)
  • 71%
    LOL, none of the above.
    (394 votes)
550 votes total Vote Now