Random Thoughts: Eliminations and Close Calls

It was almost a perfect storm for teams like Alabama hoping to get back into the College Football Playoff chase. There were a few upsets but it’s the near upsets that are showing the cracks in some foundations.

ELIMINATED! UNC, TENN, SO CAL, IOWA...

Virginia 31 North Carolina 27 - In perhaps the most astonishing upset of the year so far, the Cavs went toe to toe with the previously 10th ranked Tar Heels. Most people in the know realized that UNC was not worthy of a top 10 ranking. But still, to lose to this godawful team whose only other win came against William & Mary is devastating for Mac Brown’s playoff hopes. Up 31-27, Virginia had a chance to put the game away but fumbled the ball through the end zone for a touchback. Carolina drove the field but lost the ball on downs at the 18-yard line. After a few UVa plays and a punt, UNC got the ball back with 1:12 to go. Drake Maye got his team to midfield but a crushing hit by a defender left the football floating into the outstretched arms of linebacker James Jackson to slam the door on the Heels.

[I have to be honest. When I heard that this game was being broadcast on The CW, I tuned in because I expected to see some Jefferson Pilot s**t to make fun of. However, I was surprised to see a pretty sharp broadcast including the exclusive “ref cam”. When UVa made the game-sealing interception, the officials had to review whether the Cav properly secured the football. The CW showed about four different angles but just by mere chance none of them had a clear shot of the pick as the linebacker took the ball to the ground. But the ref cam did. Glorious.]

Utah 34 Southern Cal 32 - This game punctuates the flaw in a Lincoln Riley program - something everyone east of the Pecos already knew: defense is unimportant to him. Riley is an offensive savant but has little grasp of the other side of the ball and leaves it all to others to handle. So Cal scored a go-ahead touchdown with 1:46 remaining. On the ensuing possession, Trojan DL Bear Alexander stupidly targeted the Utah quarterback on 3rd & 26 giving the Two Utes a first down at midfield. On a 2nd & 15 with 16 ticks to go, QB Bryson Barnes ran for 26 yards ^^^ to the So Cal 19. The Utah kicker booted a 38 yard field goal at the buzzer for the upset win as a touchdown underdog.

Minnesota 12 Iowa 10 - With an all-time low over/under of 31.5, this atrocity was just what everyone expected - piss poor offense from both teams. The biggest moment in the game came with Minnie punting with 1:41 remaining. Hawkeye return man Cooper DeJean seemingly returned the boot for a go-ahead touchdown, but it was negated due to an “invalid” fair catch signal. If you watched the Alabama-Tennessee game, you saw a similar call being made. So, this is not some random obscure ticky-tack call. This ruling is one that was made in two different conferences on the same day. If the return men are not educated on this rule, that is on the coaching staffs. But back to the game. Iowa’s horrific QB Deacon Hill (10/28-116-0-1, 2 lost fumbles, 4 sacks) was intercepted and the Gophers ran out the clock.

Alabama 34 Onessee 20 - It was a tale of two halves. In the first half, Tennessee quarterback Joe Milton was Stephen Garcia. In the second half, he was Jerry Garcia. Milton was incredible for 30 minutes, making some elite passes. The next 30, he was the awful QB we thought he was. If I didn’t know any better I could have sworn the two offensive coordinators switch sides at halftime. Tommy Rees dialed up some rather creative and impressive play-calls to get the Tide back into the game after trailing 20-7 at the half. Bama would score 27 straight points while shutting UT out and down in the second half. EDITORIAL: Jihaad Campbell needs to be a starter.

NEAR MISSES

Florida State 38 Duke 20 - For the first 38 minutes of this matchup, the Blue Devils were in control. They led the Seminoles 20-17 and made their way inside the FSU red zone when Duke starting quarterback Riley Leonard reinjured his ankle. Once he left the game and his sorry ass backup came in, Duke turned into... well, Duke. The ‘Noles rolled over the Dookies like they were a high school team.

Before this game began, there were rumors flying around that Leonard was considering transferring from Duke. Now, it might have just been wishful thinking by Alabama fans that the Mobile native might come back home, but watching his frustration on the sidelines makes one wonder. After his injury he was stretching and running on the sideline, trying to prove to anyone that he was ready to go. He was begging his coach Mike Elko to put him back in the game. But Elko refused much to the visible chagrin of his quarterback. Although the coach’s intentions seem honorable, we have seen more gimpy, worst injured quarterbacks stay in games and win games.

Washington 15 Arizona State 7 - In a #PAC12AfterDark game, the Sun Devils gave Michael Penix all he could handle, frustrating him to 27 of 42 passing with no touchdown tosses, two interceptions and a lost fumble. Some Heisman, huh? In the fourth quarter up 7-6, AzSt got screwed on pass interference no-call ^^^ and then gave up a pick-6 a few plays later. Had a flag come out as it should have, UW would have been down 14-6 with about 9 minutes to go and nothing working on offense.

Oklahoma 31 Center Florida 29 - It was not quite the reunion Okie QB Dillon Gabriel (or is it Gabriel Dillon?) was hoping for when facing his former team. UCF scored a touchdown with 1:16 left in the game but missed the tying 2-point conversion on an awful play-call (surely Gus dialed up this gem).

UNCONVINCING

Ohio State 20 Penn State 12 - Zzzzz. Is it over? For such a high-profile game, this one was a bit of a snoozer. The loud-mouths will tell you it was a “defensive struggle” but really, these two offenses are pretty meh. Big Ten wonks kept raving about how wonderful PSU quarterback Drew Allar was, but he put up a poor performance (18/42-191-1-0, -23 yds rushing, 4 sacks) under the spotlights. Kyle McCord was slightly better (22/35-286-1-0, -10 rush, 2 sacks) but he gets saved by WR Marvin Harrison Jr. (11-162-1 TD) time after time.

As for the Litany Nylons, this year was supposed to be THE year (when have we heard that before?). This game was suppose to put them over the top. Instead, they look like they are well-ensconced as a second-tier also-ran. They will have to beat Michigan (Nov 11), pray that the Buckys slip up, and bank their hopes on a tiebreaker.

SEC

Ole Miss 28 Auburn 21 - Much like their game with Georgia, the War Tiger Plainsmen kept it a close game throughout in an SEC face-off played in their home stadium. Perhaps dissatisfied with Payton Thorne’s quarterbacking (1 passing TD vs SEC opponents), Hugh Freeze has been giving last season’s main starter, Robbie Ashford, more playing time as of late. Each Auburn signal caller threw a pick with the duo combining for a measly 122 yards. AU’s Jarquez Hunter had 91 yards rushing but 53 came on one scoring dash in the first quarter. The Rebels’ offense struggled as well with Jaxson Dart throwing for 202 yards, a TD, and an interception of his own. OM running back Quinshon Judkins had 124 rushing yards and a score. The Rebs racked up 223 total rushing yards which made up the difference.

Auburn has lost four straight games, all SEC match ups. At 3-4, they will have to win three of their last five (MSU, @Vandy, @Ark, cupcake, Bama) to make a bowl game

Mississippi State 7 Arkansas 3 - MSU playing without starting QB Will Rogers should have been an advantage for the Hogs. The Bullies were 1-10 on third down efficiency, managed only 205 total yards, and missed a 29 yard field goal. Who knew that a 2nd quarter touchdown pass by Clanga-clang would be enough to steal a win? Arkansas committed offensive heresy gaining 200 yards of their own and only 12 first downs and two turnovers. Send these two to the B1G!

Missouri 34 South Carolina 12 - Luther Burden caught 4 passes for 90 yards and a TD but Mizzou did not need to depend solely on their passing game with Cody Schrader rushing for 126 and two scores. He is now the top rusher and rushing scorer in the SEC with 807 yards and 9 TDs. SC’s Spencer Rattler threw a pick and was denied the end zone. He was sacked 6 times.

Mizzou has a week off before they meet Georgia in Athens on November 4.

LSU 62 Army 0 - Ugh. At least Army got a $1.6 million appearance fee.

WORST SPOT OF THE WEEK

Texas 31 Houston 24 - The Coogs gave the ‘Horns quite a scare. With 1:17 remaining, UH needed to get to the 9 for a first down. They seemingly made it but the officials backed the ball up about 18 inches for some reason. Houston could not convert on fourth down and Tejas ran out the clock. A few hours later, the officials were relieved to hear that their wives and children had been released unharmed.

In an interesting development, UT quarterback Quinn Ewers took a hard hit and left the game in the third quarter with Texas leading 24-21.

BEST SPOT OF THE WEEK

Wake Forest 21 Pitt 17 - Pitt fans (what’s left of them) took to social media to complain about this spot. However as we all know, the ball is marked at where a quarterback STARTS his slide, not where he is when a knee touches.

SOAKING IT ALL IN

Minnesota’s victory in Ames was the first one by a Gophers team since 1999. And they did it without scoring a touchdown. LOL

WORST AWARENESS OF THE WEEK

I’ve heard of a lookout block but never a look out tackle.

KEON COLEMAN CATCH OF THE WEEK

It seems every week Coleman is making some acrobatic catch.

PICK 6 OF THE WEEK

OTHER STUFF

Miami-FL 28 Clemson 20 (2 OT) - With ailing Miami QB Tyler Van Dyke sitting this one out, both head coaches tried their bests to give the other team the win. The Tigers built a 17-7 advantage after three quarters. The Hurricanes tied it up in the fourth quarter with 1:51 to play. At their own 25, Clemson’s Cade Klubnik threw three straight incompletions that took only 25 seconds off the clock and was forced to punt. Miami had the ball at their own 28 with 1:26 to go. Mario Cristobal made very little effort to score and meekly ran the clock out. Fortunately for the ‘U’, it worked out. Both teams kicked field goals in the first OT. Mia scored a TD and two-point conversion in the second extra frame. CU could not answer.

Clemson hopes to lighten the bandwagon a little more with @NCSU, Notre Dame, Ga Tech, UNC, and @SCar still to meet.

Nebraska 17 Northwestern 9 - At 4-3, the Cornhuskers are two wins away from bowl eligibility in Matt Rhule’s first season as head coach. Former coach Scott Frost had wins of 4, 5, 3, 3, and 1 in his five season in Lincoln and never went to a bowl. The next two UN games are vs Purdue and at Michigan State - both winnable.

Oregon 38 Washington State 24 - The Dux had two 100+ yards rushers. Bo Nix was good for an old man (18/25-293-2-0) but not spectacular.

Michigan 49 Dumpster Fire 0 - Can things get any worse in East Lansing?? Sparty is 2-5 overall, 0-4 in the B1G, and 0-5 vs P5. They finish @Minn, Nebr, @anOSU, @Indy, PSU. Not much chance of a bowl game here.

UNLV 25 Colorado State 23 - Vegas kicked a field goal with 3 seconds to play for win number six. Coach Barry Odom earns a $50,000 bonus for leading the Rebels (6-1) to their first bowl appearance in 10 years. It is their best start since 1984, when Randall Cunningham was the starting QB.

FAT GUY TOUCHDOWN OF THE WEEK

Wisconsin 25 Illinois 21 - Backup offensive tackle Nolan Rucci had to put on a jersey with an eligible receiver number to make the first and probably last reception of this college career.

LI’L DUDE OF THE WEEK

Photo by Katelyn Mulcahy/Getty Images

Ya know how they say football players look bigger in real life? I’m guessing So Cal kicker Denis Lynch (generously listed at 5’ 8”/ 190 lbs.) is just the opposite. He looks like a LOTR extra.

RULE CHANGE COMING

We saw this sort of thing in the Alabama-Tennessee game as well with a Vol practically trotting in place as he shuffled onto the field. Some call it “brilliant” or “gamesmanship”, but what it really is is manipulating a rule meant to help the defense in the first place. It’s right up there with flopping. I doubt you’ll ever see Saban pull this stunt.

DISS OF THE WEEK

Former Bama WR Javon Baker and a UCF teammate got called for unsportsmanlike conduct after the score but he was NOT flagged for this obvious taunting that should have negated the score. Good riddance.

WORST TAKE OF THE YEAR

He has since deleted the Tweet.

A NEW ANNUAL TRADITION

FAN BASE OF THE WEEK

You don’t have to be a Gump to appreciate how lit Bryant-Denny Stadium was on Saturday. But AS a Gump, you also have to appreciate that the Tide fans are not going to let politically correct pearl clutchers ruin what has become a great Alabama tradition. There is no other crowd participation song in sports that I can think of it that can even approach Bama’s version of Dixieland Delight. Oh, and F**K AUBURN!

NAME OF THE WEEK

This is a little unconventional, but I get a kick out of Kenyan runners who adopt vintage American names. Bama best female runners are Doris Lemngole and Hilda Olemomoi. One of the best men’s runners is Hillary Cheruiyot (yes, Hillary used to be a man’s name).

GET YOURSELVES AN AUSSIE LIKE EVERYONE ELSE!

MOST CARTOONISH HELMET OF THE WEEK

These are so goofy, but they are so hilarious. Tune in tonight,

MOST CARTOONISH HELMET OF THE WEEK, RUNNER UP

A natural tie-in with Buc-ee’s, don’t you think?

CALEB PEACE OUT WATCH

More sour body language from So Cal QB Caleb Williams. The Trojans QB lingered on the bench long after the game had ended with a “F this s**t” look on his face. Shoulda stayed in Okie instead of following the Pied Piper.

STATS OF THE WEEK

• Utah has beaten Southern Cal four straight times, three of which are on Lincoln Riley.
• Dabo Swinney is still stuck on career win number 165 in a tie with Frank Howard for the most by a Clemson coach.
• Five of Arkansas’ six losses this season have been by a touchdown or less.
• South Alabama’s last punt came at 8:36 mark of the 3rd quarter against JMU - three games ago. They have won their last two games (ULM, USM) by a combined 110 to 10.
• Oregon State WR Silas Bolden has had the most targets without a drop this season at 48. NOTE TO SABAN: Go get this guy if he doesn’t turn pro!

GAMEDAY SIGN OF THE WEEK

THE WACKY WORLD OF DESI McAFEE

Pat McAfee sent out an indecipherable tweet about his future with College GameDay. The short of it is that he has not re-signed with ESPN to participate past this year due to fan backlash. There is a place for him but apparently it’s not on mainstream sports coverage.

GD will be in Salt Lake City for Oregon v Utah. FOX Noon Kickoff will be covering Kansas-Oklahoma in Lawrence, KS. SEC Nation will be at the World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party.

ADOPT-A-TEAM

• Jamey Chadwell (38-6 over the last four seasons ) Liberty (7-0) topped MTSU 42-35. #MaybeJamey
• Tulane (6-1) blew a 28-7 lead as North Texas stormed back to the tie the game. However, a 19 yard Michael Pratt scramble for a TD with 2:42 left saved the Green Wave from a potentially devastating defeat.
• Wyoming (5-2) had a bye, plays Boise on FS2.

COUSINS

• South Alabama (4-3) - The Jags beat the ever-living crap out of Southern Miss like Jada on Will 55-3. At halftime, USA had more points scored, 31, than USM had yards gained, 26. Next, the Mobile Marauders (-10) host ULL.
• Troy (5-2) - The Trojans (-6) had a week off to prepare for Texas State with bowl eligibility and first place in the Sun Belt West on the line.
• Jacksonville State (6-2) - The Gamecocks upset WKU 20-17 on a last second 41-yard field goal in which the kicker slipped and still made the kick. JSU has six wins but due to an idiotic senseless NCAA rule, they are not eligible for a bowl game. The ‘Cocks (-8) travel to godawful FIU.

THAT ANNOYING GUY WHO DOESN’T EVEN PUT HIS DIRTY DISHES IN THE SINK

• UAB (2-6) - Going without QB1 Jacob Zeno, the Dragons tried three different replacements and none of them could affect Memphis’ defense. The 45-21 loss puts oo-ab one loss away from being out of bowl eligibility. A week off before FAU! comes to town.

SALUTE TO OUR TROOPS

Air Force takes the lead in the Commander-in-Chief’s Trophy, Round 1 with a win over Navy 17-6. Both defenses were on display. The Falcons had only 8 first downs and the Middies netted only 124 total yards. AFA’s explosive plays and a pick-6 by their defense was the difference.

• Air Force (7-0) - Troy Calhoun is three wins away from three straight seasons of double-digit Ws. AFA (-12) heads to Colorado State.
• Navy (3-4) - The Midshipmen have a week off before a trip to play woeful Temple.
• Army (2-5) - The Black Knights got smoked by LSU 62-0. Next for the Gold and Black (-10) is a home game against ghastly UMass.

ELIMINATED FROM PLAYOFF CONTENTION

Eliminated: All non-P5s, Notre Dame, Clemson, Boston College, Louisville, Miami-FL, NC State, Syracuse, Virginia, Wake, Pitt, Virginia Tech, Georgia Tech, Baylor, Houston, Iowa State, K-State, Kansas, West Virginia, BYU, Cincinnati, Center Florida, Oklahoma State, TCU, Texas Tech, Rutgers, Sparty, Maryland, Minnie, Nebraska, Northwestern, Iowa, Purdue, Illinois, Indiana, Wisconsin, Arizona State, Arizona, Colorado, Stanford, Cal, UCLA, Wazzu, South Carolina, Kentucky, Vanderbilt, Missy State, Arky, Auburn, Florida, Texas A&M NEW: Tennessee, Southern Cal, Duke, UNC

Endangered: Alabama, Texas, Oregon NEW: Washington (vulnerable), Okie (vulnerable)

Extremely Endangered: Oregon State, Utah, Ole Miss, LSU, Mizzou, NEW: Penn State

A way WAY WAY too early look at the College Football Playoff (CFP) picture:

DraftKings odds to win the 2023 National Championship:

1. Michigan +800 to +750 to +700 to +475 to +400 to +340 to +280 to +225 (bet $100 to win $225)
2. Georgia +220 to+240 to +230 to +300 to +260 to +280 to +275
3. FSU +2000 to +1100 +1000 drop to +1200 to +800 to +900 to +800 to +700
4. Ohio State +700 to +750 to +900 +1200 to +1000 to +800 to +750 to +900 to +800 to +700
5. Washington to +1500 to +1200 to +800 to +1200
6. Alabama +600 to +550 to +2500 to +4000 to +4000 to +2500 to +2000 to +1400
7. Oklahoma +1400 to +1200 to +1400
8. Texas +2200 to +1000 to +800 to +750 to +1800 to +2200
9. Oregon to +1600 to +1400 to +2500 to +3000
10. Penn State +2200 to +1800 to +1600 to +1400 to +1200 to +5000

• LSU +1100 to +3500 to +3500 to +3000 to +4000 to +15000 to +20000 to +15000 to +8000
• Southern Cal +1500 to +1600 to +1500 stays at +1400 to +1600 to +1800 to +2500 to +7500 to +30000

Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.

• ACC - Even if UNC runs the table, I don’t know if they can come back from losing a home game to a historically awful Virginia team. It might be Florida State or bust, and the ‘Noles have looked vulnerable at times.
• Big 12 - Okie and Texas both looked wobbly on Saturday.
• Big Ten - Penn State is not out yet, but it’s a long and treacherous road for them. Still waiting on Michigan to play a team with a pulse. anOSU plays at Wisky on Saturday.
• PAC-12 - The PAC is kinda looking a little shaky these days. Washington is still undefeated but has to play @SoCal, Utah, and @Oregon St in consecutive weeks in November.
• SEC - Dang! I coulda sworn everybody was saying Alabama was dead.
• Indies
• Non-Power 5

RANK ‘EM IF YOU GOT ‘EM

Tell it like it IS, Herbie! In reality, the polls mean nothing anymore - unless we get some jackass in charge of the CFPC. Currently, it is NC State athletic director Boo Corrigan for what that’s worth. The first college football playoff rankings release is less than a week away on October 31.

It must have been SO painful for the national media to move Alabama up to #9 and drop PSU to #10.

1. Georgia (38) 7-0
2. Michigan (19) 8-0
3. Ohio State (3) 7-0
4. Florida State (3) 7-0
5. Washington 7-0
6. Oklahoma 7-0
7. Texas 6-1
8. Oregon 6-1
9. Alabama 7-1
10. Penn State 6-1
11. Oregon State 6-1
12. Ole Miss 6-1
13. Utah 6-1
14. Notre Dame 6-2
15. LSU 6-2
16. Missouri 7-1
17. North Carolina 6-1
18. Louisville 6-1
19. Air Force 7-1
20. Duke 5-2
21. Tennessee 5-2
22. Tulane 6-1
23. UCLA 5-2
24. Southern Cal 6-2
25. James Madison 7-1

LET’S GO BOWLING!

• 32 teams are now bowl eligible for 82 bowl slots.
• Of the 131 FBS teams eligible for the post season, only eight are still undefeated. JMU is also unbeaten but a stupid NCAA rule says they cannot play in the post-season for a reason nobody seems to know.
• Michigan is the only 8-0 team, but believe me PAAWWWWLLLL. They ain’t played nobody.

• It was announced this week that the Bahamas Bowl will be played at “an alternate location” due to construction efforts. I am no expert on the island nation, but I seriously doubt there is another stadium in the country that can accommodate an American football game. A one year move to Florida seems likely.

LET’S GO BLOWING!

• Great God Almighty, Nevada is off the schneid! The Wolf Pack snapped a 16-game losing streak by winning AT San Diego State by the ridiculous and ugly score of 6-0. If Nevada wins out, they are bowl eligible.
• Sam Houston is the only winless team remaining.
• Sam Houston, UMass, Akron, and Kent State have 7 losses each. 14 teams sit at 6 losses including Arkansas and Vanderbilt.
• All power 5 teams have won at least one game this season. After Virginia’s unlikely win over UNC, only six still have yet to beat a fellow P5. They are Arkansas, UCF, Michigan State, Vanderbilt, Indiana, Arizona State.
• Arizona State is 1-6 with their sole victory coming against 2-4 FCS Southern Utah 24-21.
• Indy and Sparty are eliminated from any chance of winning the the Big Ten East. Auburn and Arky are out of the running for the SEC West.

Krazy Kristi’s “SHUT UP!” of the Week goes to whiny post-TSIO Tennessee fans. Before the Bama-UT game, they were all up on Twitter LOL-ing that “Alabama fans are out here complaining about officiating from last year’s game.” After the game, can you guess what they were doing?

These people are straight up lunatics. And dumb lunatics at that. Whoda thunk there are two guys named Ken Williamson in the world?

HEISMAN HYPE

This is how stupid the Heisman is. Michael Penix - whose Huskies have only played one legit team in Oregon - almost lost to a REALLY BAD Arizona State team at home. He had three turnovers and 0 touchdowns. Yet, he only fell one spot because the game started late and lazy ass sportswriters who make a decent salary to cover such things didn’t watch. JJ McCarthy moves up to the top spot because gollygeewhillickers they beat up big bad Michigan State and they’re numbah wun. Seriously, I think Auburn could have handily beaten the calamitous Spartans. UGA’s sketchy Carson Beck moves into the top 8 by sitting at home doing nothing.

Marvin Harrison Jr., is the first non-QB to crack the top 20. He is a fine wide receiver and will make a fine NFLer someday. However it is my humble opinion that he is not even the best at his position. That honor would go to Mizzou’s Luther Burden. But daggumit, an Ohio State is 7-0! We gotta put some Bucky in dere!

Below are just some of the top Heisman picks in order of the money lines. Odds are provided by DraftKings and many more options can be seen at that link under the AWARDS tab. [Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.]

1. QB JJ McCarthy (JR, Michigan) out of nowhere up to +1000 to +240 for beating doormats.
2. QB Michael Penix (6th YR, Washington) from +1600 to +900 to +550 to +400 to +380 to +200 to -140 to +320
3. QB Jayden Daniels (5th YR, LSU) +1100 to +3000 to +2200 +1800 to +2500 to +3500 to +1400 to +340
4. QB Jordan Travis (6th YR, FSU) from +1400 to +900 to +1500 to +1200 to +1500 to +1600 to +1200 to +800 to +1100
5. QB Dillon Gabriel (5th YR, Oklahoma) +1200 to +1000 to +1100
6. QB Bo Nix (5th YR, Oregon) +1000 to +900 to +600 to +2000 to +1600
7. Marvin Harrison Jr. (JR, anOhio State) +2000 to +1600

• QB Drake Maye (JR, UNC) +1800 to +5000
• QB Caleb Williams (JR, Southern Cal) +450 to +400 to +380 to +400 to +180 to +220 to +2000 to +8000
• QB Jalen Milroe (RS-SO, Bama) +12000 to +10000 to +9000 to +5000 to +8000
• QB Quinn Ewers (RS-SO, Texas) +1300 to +900 to +700 to +600 to +900 to +3000 +5000 to not listed
• QB Sam Hartman (6th YR, Notre Dame) fell from +1600 to +2000 to +1100 to +2200 to +6500 to +8000
• QB Shedeur Sanders (JR, Colorado) +1800 to +8000 to +12000 to +20000
• RB Jase McClellan (SR, Bama) +12000 to +15000 to +20000

THE SICK REPORT

• Texas QB Quinn Ewers hurt his shoulder on a big hit from a defender. It is very reminiscent of another Texas QB who was knocked out of a big game. “If only Colt hadn’t-uv gotten hurt...” Ewers is considered day-to-day, but UT seemed about the same with backup RS-frosh Maalik Murphy taking snaps. [SIDE NOTE: 2023’s #1 recruit and God’s gift to the world Arch Manning has yet to take a college snap. Hmm. Do ya think maybe he was a smidge overrated because of the name on the back of his jersey??]
• Penn State lost their defensive leader edge rusher Chop Robinson to a concussion in the second quarter of the Ohio State game.
• Already without starting QB Cade McNamara, Iowa has lost tight end and leading receiver Erick All (21 rec, 299 yds, 3 TD) for the season as well.
• Utah now stands at 6-1 and still in the running for the PAC title. Remarkably, they have done so without star quarterback Cameron Rising who tore multiple ligaments in January’s Rose Bowl loss to Penn State. After the Utes win over Southern Cal on Saturday, coach Kyle Whittingham announced that Rising will take a medical redshirt, ending any chance for a return this season. Personally, I would have waited until the end of the season to make such announcement. Why not make opposing teams prepare for him as well?

R.I.P.

• This has nothing to do with Alabama or football, but if you are a Twin Peaks fan you’ll remember Piper Laurie as the conniving Catherine Martell who ran the mill. She also starred in the excellent 1961 Paul Newman film The Hustler and as the abusive mother to Sissy Spacek’s Carrie in 1976 among other roles. She was 91.
• Also passing this week was Chrissy Snow, aka Suzanne Somers (age 76) from Three’s Company.

DRAMA

• If you haven’t heard by now, news broke last Thursday that the Big Ten approached Michigan’s impending opponent for Saturday, Michigan State, with what they described as “credible evidence” that Michigan had successfully stolen signs of opposing teams this season. According to a report by Yahoo Sports, Michigan allegedly had people attending games of future opponents as well as possible College Football Playoff opponents to gather information on signs used to call plays on offense and defense. A suspended Michigan staffer at the center of the NCAA’s sign-stealing probe, purchased tickets in his own name for more than 30 games over the past three years at 11 different Big Ten schools, including this past Saturday’s Penn State-Ohio State game on both sides of the stadium. Stealing signs itself is not against the rules. But sending a person to scout is. So, Jim Harbaugh is not on the up and up? Shocking, I know. The ridiculous thing is that the Wolverines have played one of the softest schedules by a Power-5 to date. Why did Harbaugh think he needed to stoop to this level against this array of cupcakes? The Michigan foes to date were vs East Carolina (W 30-3), vs UNLV (W 35-7), vs Bowling Green (W 31-6), vs Rutgers (W 31-7), @ Nebraska (W 45-7), @ Minnesota (W 52-10), vs Indiana (W 52-7), and vs Sparty (W 49-0). I am pretty sure Arkansas or Missy State could have run that table too - without cheating. The NCAA still has an open case on Harbaugh and UM dating back to 2020 on other violations. The sad thing is that he’ll just skip off to the NFL with no punishment. More to come...
• Harbaugh on a radio show proclaimed “If we go undefeated, I’m going to get a 15-0 tattoo. Probably on the shoulder. And a block ‘M’ over it.” Arrogant.
• Sam Pittman fired his OC Dan Enos - and with good cause! Arkansas has a talent in quarterback KJ Jefferson but he has not being utilized to his capabilities. Arky is 121st in total offense averaging 305.9 ypg.

KOACHES KORNER

• Many major news outlets are reporting that unless Jimbo Fisher performs some kind of miracle, that he is out after this season - gigantic buyout be damned. It is said that boosters “will find” the $77,562,500 that he will be owed. Ed Orgeron may have a new drinking buddy real soon.
• Kevin Sumlin coached six seasons with the Aggies and finished 51-26. Now in his own sixth season, Fisher is currently 43–24 with five games to go in the regular season: SCar, @OM, MSU, cupcake, @LSU. Speaking of Sumlin, the Maryland OC was arrested for DUI in Florida over the weekend. The Terps had a bye.
• Last week it was reported that South Carolina coach Shane Beamer got ticked off after his Gamecocks pissed away the game against Texas A&M and kicked “something” and broke a bone in his foot. He laughed it off in a pathetic self-deprecating way, but why not use it as a way to fire your team up? That program needs a little anger in them. Beamer is just too nice of a guy to ever win big.
• Not to be outdone as the biggest dope in the Palmetto State, Clemson’s Dabo Swinney said some pretty stupid things last week after barely beating Wake Forest: “We’re at a point where if you don’t go undefeated, you are losers, you’re terrible .... and that is just such a terrible mindset. Honestly, maybe we need to lose a few games and lighten up the bandwagon. Sometimes the bandwagon can get a little too full.” I guess he wasn’t kidding about losing because his Tigers did just that in a game that Miami was trying so hard to hand them. The #NeverDabo bandwagon will never be too full.

• Lincoln Riley is becoming a regular in this section. This time, the overrated thin-skinned Southern Cal coach did not make players available for the press after the loss to Utah which ticked off many in the L.A. press corps. For many of the long-time scribes, it is the first time they can recall such a thing happening from the Southern Cal program. Earlier this season, Riley banned a reporter for innocently talking to a player outside the structured interview time. Influential writer Bill Plaschke of the LA Times is calling him a “bust”. SEC Network’s Peter Burns calls him “soft”. And many others are starting to call him “West Coast Jimbo”. On Tuesday, he ducked out of his weekly appearance in a radio show, claiming to be “under the weather”. Losing the fan base is one thing. When a coach loses the press pool, that spells trouble. He’ll probably be joining Harbaugh in the NFL soon enough.
• Urban Meyer is stocking up on apples and razor blades.
• A Minnesota man was disqualified from the world’s largest pumpkin contest when it was discovered it was just Fat F*** Phil Fulmer. Looks.just.like.him.

TEEVEE

THIS WEEK

(Below is an abbreviated list of highlighted games of interest with lines provided by DraftKings. If you REALLY need to know about the big Western Michigan-Eastern Michigan showdown, you can find the details here.)

Tuesday, October 24

New Mexico State at Louisiana Tech (-2.5) 6pm/7pm CBSSN - Aggies going for win number six.
Liberty (-2.5) at Western Kentucky 6:30/7:30 ESPNU

Wednesday, October 25

Jacksonville State (-7) at FIU 6pm/7pm CBSSN
UTEP at Sam Houston (-2) 7pm/8pm ESPN2 - Will SHSU get that elusive first win?

Thursday, October 26

Syracuse at Virginia Tech (-1.5) 6:30/7:30 ESPN - ‘Cuse is riding a 3-game slide.
Georgia State at Georgia Southern (-3) 6:30/7:30 ESPN2

Friday, October 27

FAU (-6.5) at Charlotte 6:30/7:30 ESPN2

Saturday, October 28

SEC

South Carolina at Texas A&M (-14) 11am/Noon ESPN - Two teams desperate for a win.
Georgia (-14.5) at Florida 2:30/3:30 CBS - The World’s Largest Outdoor Cocktail Party
Mississippi State at Auburn (-6.5) 2:30/3:30 SECN - MSU almost a TD underdog?
Tennessee (-3.5) at Kentucky 6pm/7pm ESPN - Who has the biggest hangover?
Vanderbilt at Ole Miss (-25.5) 6:30/7:30 SECN

* Alabama, LSU, Miz, and Arky are off this week. With the exception of Vandy, no more bye weeks for SEC teams after this Saturday.

OTHERS WORTH A PEEK

Oklahoma (-10) at Kansas 11am/Noon FOX - The Sooners proved vulnerable.
BYU at Texas (-17.5) 2:30/3:30 ABC - So did Tejas ^^^. Will Ewers play?
Oregon (-7) at Utah 2:20/3:30 FOX - CFP eliminator.
Ohio State (-14.5) at Wisconsin 6:30/7:30 NBC - Could this be the week anOSU poops the bed?

“SLEEP, PRETTY DARLING, DO NOT CRY/AND I WILL SING A LULLABY” ~ Golden Slumbers, The Beatles

Oregon State (-3.5) at Arizona 9:30/10:30 ESPN - Don’t be surprise if the Wildcats upset the Beavs.

SABAN vs. POP & BEAR

Below is a count of career FBS/Division I-A win totals for coaches.

For those of you new to RBR Random Thoughts, we count all on-field wins at the FBS/Division I-A level. So, before you go squawking about Frank Beamer, 42 of his wins came at Murray State. Mack Brown had six victories in one season with Appalachian State when they were still in what was known at I-AA (FCS today). Brian Kelly won 118 games with something called Grand Valley State. So, let’s stop talking about his win record with such reverence. In addition, we don’t recognize NCAA sanctioned forfeits. If you won on the field, it counts in our books.

Mack Brown loses ground to Saban.

#ALABAMA

• For his performance against the Vols, Jihaad Campbell was named SEC Co-Defensive Player of the Week. The sophomore had a career-high 10 tackles and the ol’ scoop & score.
• Will Reichard was again named the SEC Specialist of the Week. He connected on field goals of 42 and 50 yards to extend his streak of consecutive field goals to 28. He also converted three extra points for ten total points on the day to put him four behind NFL bust Montee Ball.

1. QB Keenan Reynolds, Navy 530 (+34)
2. RB Kenneth Dixon, Louisiana Tech 522 (+26)
3. RB Montee Ball, Wisconsin 500 (+4)
4. PK Austin Seibert, Oklahoma 499 (+3)
5. PK Will Reichard, Alabama 496
6. PK Zane Gonzalez, Arizona State 494
7. PK Christopher Dunn, North Carolina State 491
8. PK Daniel Carlson, Auburn 480

• Last week, the Associated Press released a Midseason All-American list. Three Alabama players were named to the first team: Kool-Aid McKinstry, Dallas Turner, and Reichard. Notre Dame defensive tackle Howard Cross III also made the list and still to this day I don’t understand why Alabama did not recruit him, like, at all.
• Bama safety Caleb Downs made the 247Sports Midseason All-True Freshman team.
• According to Nick Saban, CB Terrion Arnold suffered a “slight concussion” but was ably replaced by Trey Amos. With Alabama having this Saturday off, it should give Arnold ample time to recover.
• LB Trezmen Marshall has “bruised ribs” and did not play against the Vols. Saban expects him to be okay for the LSU game. Which is great but daggumit, Saban, just start Jihaad Campbell already!
• OG Jaeden Roberts started his third straight game over human turnstile Darrian Dalcourt and has been playing really well. It would have to be assumed that he holds onto that role going forward.

Aye Ell Dot Com can go f**k themselves sideways but this is a pretty good montage ^^^.

BYE WEEK: Alabama has an off week to prepare for a big SEC West showdown.

IN TWO SATURDAYS - GAME 9: Saturday, November 4, 2023

Alabama Crimson Tide (7-1, 5-0) vs LSU Tigers (6-2, 4-1)

Tuscaloosa, AL ~ 6:45/7:45 CBS

• In accordance with the SEC-CBS agreement, CBS is allowed doubleheaders on Oct. 14 and Nov. 4. With a slate of Alabama-LSU, Georgia-Missouri, and Texas A&M-Ole Miss as the marquee games, it seemed likely that Bama would fill one of those two slots with UGA-Miz (2:30/3:30) taking the other. It’s just a matter of figuring out who the announcers will be.
• Alabama is an astonishing 117-18 in SEC play since Nick Saban was hired. Excluding the lost first season of 2007, the Tide is 113-14 (.890). Tennessee has 15 conference losses 2020-today. LSU has 13 in that same time span. Auburn has 15 SEC defeats from 2021-2023.
• Have you been listening to Eli Gold on Alabama Radio. A few regular listeners have told me they find him to be... less than sharp. Also hearing Chris Chris Stewart has not been exactly great, but a little better than Eli.
• No point spread has been released from DraftKings for Bama-LSU as of yet. I’m no big city bookie but my wild blind dart-throwing suggests it will open around Alabama -4.5. What do you think?

Odds/lines subject to change. T&Cs apply. See draftkings.com/sportsbook for details.